DH wfh

[Feellikedancingyeah]

Like many other families it's been hard with DH WFH since March. I am doing my best to occupy DS (14) so DH can concentrate on work. DS occasionally comes into the living room if I am in there, to ask me for help with technical issues with his phone etc. He does get excited on the phone sometimes when playing minecraft.
DH always tuts loudly and says "God why can't he be quiet". Today I reminded DH that I have again taken out DS all morning to am activity and he snapped and said "you can piss off too".
DH can't move his computer upstairs as there is no wired connection and he won't use a wi fi only connection. The hub is in the living room. Sky won't move it as they won't come into the house for that job due to Covid. DS can't use wi-fi in his bedroom as it does not work properly, even with the booster from Sky.
AIBU to think DH is being unreasonable with his attitude?

Can you get a really long ethernet cable and run it up the stairs? You could cable clip it to the skirting board. They're only a few quid a meter from Amazon.

Drill one hole through the floor and run an Ethernet cable upstairs. Cable is surprisingly cheap even for really long runs. No way would I wfh in the main living space. It isn’t fair to anyone, including the worker.

That’s rude of you husband but you should just focus on sorting the problem out.

Why won’t he use the WiFi only connection?

Also, for your son, you need a WiFi repeater. They are very simple to set up.

I don’t recommend that for your husband because I need a wired connection too. WiFi can’t handle the load I put on the system.

Get tp links for the bedrooms.

They are brilliant and turn your plugs into Ethernet connections

www.tp-link.com/uk/home-networking/powerline/

Just tell them both to work it out between them. A grown man and a 14yo don't need you to fix their problems, or keep them entertained. At 14 can't he go out with his friends?

DH works downstairs in the dining room for the same reasons. The difference is, he is aware that while he is working, this is also our home and he cannot expect the deathly hush he enjoys at work.

I will tell the girls to tone it down, but he's also got head phones to drown out the noise, and by crikey, if he told me to piss off, when I was pointing out that considerable efforts had already been made by me and the children to mitigate noise and disturbance for his superior self, he'd find himself listening to the soundtrack of 'Chess' on loop, at a dull roar, until he came to his senses. (And believe me, if I break out 'Chess', people duck for cover. . .)

@Feellikedancingyeah

Like many other families it's been hard with DH WFH since March. I am doing my best to occupy DS (14) so DH can concentrate on work. DS occasionally comes into the living room if I am in there, to ask me for help with technical issues with his phone etc. He does get excited on the phone sometimes when playing minecraft. DH always tuts loudly and says "God why can't he be quiet". Today I reminded DH that I have again taken out DS all morning to am activity and he snapped and said "you can piss off too". DH can't move his computer upstairs as there is no wired connection and he won't use a wi fi only connection. The hub is in the living room. Sky won't move it as they won't come into the house for that job due to Covid. DS can't use wi-fi in his bedroom as it does not work properly, even with the booster from Sky. AIBU to think DH is being unreasonable with his attitude?

DH needs to pull his finger out and sort out the wired connectivity issue if he insists on being so precious about it.

Wtf won’t your DH use the WiFi?

He sounds very precious and “me me me”.

Yes he’s working but it doesn’t mean he’s the only person who counts. It’s a tricky time for everyone just now.

On the other hand, 14 is old enough to know not to disturb someone who’s working.

But your DH does need to get out of the communal room if he wants quiet.

WFH is hard with kids about but god it's his DS too. Not fair to take it all out on you at all. YANBU

Your husband is unreasonable. He can't dominate the main living areas when you are at home.

We both work from home - I'm part time. Early in lockdown we said this is a home first and foremost, and a makeshift workplace second. It has saved arguments with two noisy kids as it is not unreasonable to make noise in your own home. We work in a bedroom upstairs and try to keep the kids away. The WiFi is sometimes patchy but we use a hotspot on our phones when that happens...

I don’t know why people are suggesting technical solutions. Your husband is choosing to act the cunt - treat him like one.

I just read this DH can't move his computer upstairs as there is no wired connection and he won't use a wi fi only connection. The hub is in the living room. Sky won't move it as they won't come into the house for that job due to Covid. DS can't use wi-fi in his bedroom as it does not work properly, even with the booster from Sky.

Don't talk to anyone in Sky with this. They are totally useless. DH and I are very technical, and all the engineers from BT, Sky and Virgin are useless. Try finding a local IT guy who come to your home and set up a proper wifi or wired network for you.

To properly support a home with a lot of wireless devices, you should have a mesh network. I think BT is offering them now, but you can buy your own off amazon. Just google wireless mesh network.

If you want to just have another wired connection upstair, get a pair of ethernet over power adaptors. Again off amazon.

It sounds like your situation can be solved with better internet!!

Your poor son... and what a way to speak to you too!
DH needs

1. learn some manners and not be so precious and self important.
2. to sort out wifi, he can easily get a wifi link that plugs into your electric plug socket and keep his wired link to his PC/Laptop. He could also get a phone hotspot set up .

@JoJoSM2

That’s rude of you husband but you should just focus on sorting the problem out.

And why is that OP’s problem? Her husband is the one WFH, he can be the one who sorts out the problem rather than snipping at family members who are already trying their best to accommodate him.

It's not always possible to use a wifi connection, for various reasons. BUT there is absolutely nothing stopping him from getting a cable and running it up the bloody stairs. It isn't hard!

@Namechangearoo ‘you’ the family and not the OP.

I don’t understand why he can’t use WiFi

I currently work from home, I got a 30m ethernet cable from work and i work in the play room, the kids take the toys they want out and they can change thrm when i have a break if they want to

The technical issues are easier to fix than your husband’s shitty attitude.
I WFH in our main living area - did pre Covid do, but was mostly home alone then.
I’ve managed to never tell any of my family to piss off.
Cos I’m not a prick

I feel your pain OP. Mine's taken over the kitchen. Not ideal...

DS has mild SEN and is easily over-excited. He does not have the capacity to be out roaming free

We're a family of video game fans, my dd is 15 and knows she can't shout at games when I'm working. I don't shout at mine when she's studying.

What do you mean by a bit excited? The occasions "noooo" if you're son has died is one thing but if it's regular commentary and raised voices (which I'm guilty of myself when I'm playing) when dh is trying to work I can see why he's frustrated.

We sort have got into a pattern where video games are not played in a room where someone is working, dd would find me playing distracting when's shes studying for example and work and school take priority.

Saying that, our PC and consoles are not in in the living room, your dh can't expect silence if he's working in the living room. You son should be able to speak to his mum in his own living room without feeling like a pest. An extra long Ethernet cable and drill holes so dh can work upstairs would be a solution.