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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my nephew in the house at weekend?

30 replies

BugCatcher879 · 17/08/2020 13:28

My nephews school (teenagers) is part of a covid cluster. He is in year below but has had passing contact with at least 1 of the pupils in question. They have been told there isn't a risk to other pupils. The cluster number is growing.

We have vulnerable family members and I also have health conditions.

We were due to have them over for dinner next weekend, I want to say we cancel that and rearrange when we have clearer answers about the cluster spread.

Am I over reacting? I have been told I am.

OP posts:
Palavah · 17/08/2020 13:28

Is he having a test?

Redred2429 · 17/08/2020 13:30

I would do the same op if it's the cluster I'm thinking of I think there may be more cases

HollowTalk · 17/08/2020 13:31

As far as I'm concerned, we are still in lockdown and so I'd say that the dinner would have to be put off until later in the year. You'd be unreasonable to just ban him if you then accept others in his household, because if he has anything, they will, too.

vanillandhoney · 17/08/2020 13:32

Nope, YANBU.

I wouldn't want someone who was "part of a cluster" in my house either. See them in a few weeks when it's clear he hasn't got the virus.

Original poster
BugCatcher879 · 17/08/2020 13:34

The dinner plan is him and SIL sitting 2 m apart either indoors or outdoors and having takeaway pizza. (This is allowed where we live as long as 2m apart and within the household numbers allowed)

No he isn't having a test. He hasn't been traced as a close contact but that kight change as the numbers are growing and he possibly has had contact with a sibling of confirmed.

The whole school is still open and he is attending although I've heard many have kept children home.

OP posts:
Spied · 17/08/2020 13:35

No, you're not overreacting. I'd feel the same.
My family would say I was overreacting but tbh it's my home and if we were not all comfortable with something then it wouldn't happen.
Reschedule and if they take offense then tough.

Yeahnahmum · 17/08/2020 13:36

Cancel!

heartsonacake · 17/08/2020 13:38

YANBU. I would cancel.

giletrouge · 17/08/2020 13:55

WHO is telling you you are overreacting?
You are not overreacting, you're taking care of yourself and other vulnerable family members.

BeeTrees · 17/08/2020 13:57

I would cancel and going forth only have visitors in the garden with a takeaway, bring their own cups etc or use disposable ones. Not coming in for the toilet either,

Orchidflower1 · 17/08/2020 14:00

110% cancel

NailsNeedDoing · 17/08/2020 14:06

Don’t be silly, the virus can’t spread in schools, that’s why they’re fully open and PPE isn’t needed inside them. Hmm

LouiseTrees · 17/08/2020 14:38

Just cancel but don’t say it’s for that reason.

DuckbilledSplatterPuff · 17/08/2020 15:06

Cancel! or rather postpone until you have more info. And do it now. Don't wait for someone else to do it until its so close to the time you have to go ahead. A simple text will do.
Its your home and your health and you have a right to protect yourself without other people telling you what to do..
and clearly, since there is a covid cluster at your nephew's school you can be a covid carrier.

OldEvilOwl · 17/08/2020 15:07

Cancel, its only takeaway pizza - not worth risking it

MindyStClaire · 17/08/2020 15:39

I'm pretty relaxed about seeing people now, but in those circumstances I'd cancel and wait a couple of weeks. And if anyone in this house had those circumstances, we'd be lying low and cancelling social engagements!

PoodleMoth · 17/08/2020 16:06

Cancel and rearrange. I bet this happening in loads of schools but we won't hear about it!

GinDrinker00 · 17/08/2020 16:09

Just rearrange.

Pinnacular · 17/08/2020 16:12

Have takeaway pizza over zoom. Not worth the risk.

Original poster
BugCatcher879 · 17/08/2020 17:13

They have been told there is no risk to them. I don't see how that's possibly the case. Confused SIL thinks I'm overreacting.

OP posts:
Original poster
BugCatcher879 · 17/08/2020 17:15

Thank you all. That's exactly how I feel.

OP posts:
Redshoeblueshoe · 17/08/2020 17:18

It's irrelevant that there's no risk to them, it's the vulnerable members of your household that count

unmarkedbythat · 17/08/2020 17:24

If you are worried, cancel. I can't work out whether you are right to be worried or being OTT- but that doesn't even matter, it's your house, your choice, you have health issues and vulnerable relatives, so unless you are 100% happy with arrangements, cancel. I think my own parents are being totally OTT with their response to the virus but it doesn't matter what I think- they don't feel safe without the precautions they are taking, so we all support their taking them.

CardsforKittens · 17/08/2020 17:36

It doesn’t matter if your SIL thinks you’re overreacting. You can take whatever steps you wish to take in order to feel safe. If she complains, so what?

Orchidflower1 · 18/08/2020 07:33

It’s your home- who is more important to you , the people who live in your house or your SIL???