facial birthmark

[brunel55]

My son is 7 months old and has a prominent pigmented nevus on his face which he was born with. it's something that has worried me tremendously from day 1 as I worry for his self -esteem when he starts school etc. We have not seen a dermatologist yet but lots have said it will fade but it hasn't a huge amount and seems to be growing with his face i.e. getting bigger. He is such a gorgeous, playful and delightful little baby and we love him more than anything in the world but this gives me bad anxiety and I wonder if anyone else who have a similar experience can share their story. Is it a possibility to get it removed when he is old enough etc etc. thank u :)

Following with interest as our DD has one on her eye

My brother and uncle both have facial birthmarks. To the best of my knowledge neither of them have ever had problems, and both of them now have lovely lives and partners.

My brother's sounds similar to your son's and is definitely a smaller part of his face now than it was as a child, but did grow with his face when he was younger. Think carefully about removal because of scarring- my parents decided against it.

My son has one which is blood vessels on his stomach and is niw fading. Didn't start fading until 1 and has been a slow process.

I kniw someone with a big birth mark across face and it never caused them any issues in life. No bullying at school and happily married. Don't worry about it, it doesn't matter

Thank you for your comments. It seems to be something you live with and come to terms with. My thought process is that a scar would be a lot less unsightly as the birthmark itself which is very prominent due to its shape and colour.
Lots of people have said not to worry but I can’t help how I feel about it. I appreciate it’s my son that has to live with it and deal with it when he gets older but I think dealing with it whilst he is an infant - he will never know any different x

I think they can be removed these days?
I’m sure I saw a tv doc where a girl had a large “port wine stain” birthmark and had it removed

I have a port wine stain on my face (lip/cheek) and I can honestly say I never give it another thought and it has not caused me any issues, the only time it does is when you get your make up done and the MUA insists on trying to cover it up-no thanks I look weird without it it’s part of me! My DC1 had 3 decent sized Haemangiomas which grew up until he was around 10 months then shrunk down to pretty much nothing by the age of 4. We were referred to dermatology when he was a couple of months old more due to the location of 2 of them the GP was concerned they could cause other problems but dermatology were very reluctant to intervene until they saw how they played out as he grew-rightly so they all have shrunk and subsequently discharged from follow up at age 4. Perhaps they just didn’t bother me that much as I have lived with a facial birth mark all my life with no issues.

Can you take a photo of it? My DS has a strawberry birthmark on his head from about 2 weeks old. It grew quickly for about 3/4 months and then stopped. It was bright red and bulbous, looked like it could pop at any time.

He's 3 now and his hairline has covered it, but if you part his hair you can just see it. It's no longer bulbous, the skin is ever so slightly 'loose' and it's just a slightly darker colour. The skin is almost mottled, I think that's where the blood vessels are slowly closing.

My cousins child had one on his lip and had a lot of laser treatment. It's basically gone now (he's primarily age and he didn't start treatment until he was an older toddler).

Attached a photo of DS's birthmark.

Actually created an account to reply to this. I had one on my neck.

Growing up, kids stared and asked what it was, but once you told them it was a mole or a birthmark they were satisfied. I was never bullied over it because I think it was too OBVIOUS. My parents always told me it made me unique and they thought it was beautiful.

At 16, I found out some boys were calling me names related to my mole, and it also got badly sunburnt. I found out there was a slightly higher risk of skin cancer and my GP said I could have it removed on the NHS. Sadly, we couldn't have known I scar terribly and the resulting scar was worse than the mole. It required a second surgery and years of steroid injections and plasters. 15 years later kids still stare and ask questions!

Anyway... it's hard to tell from your OP how bad the birthmark is or what the placement is. I would recommend you speak to a dermatologist and plastic surgeon about what options are available before making a decision. In my experience, a scar CAN be as bad as the original birthmark, but I'm in the minority there.

Thanks I appreciate your input here. Sorry to hear about your experience with scarring -I have never thought of the risk that the scar could be worse than a birthmark. After having done a fair bit of research for a pigmented birthmark which is rooted deep within the skin the surgical removal is a better option as as with laser it is likely to come back?
We will definitely consider speaking to a professional but due to his tender age they will probably tell us to leave it a few years.
As for name calling I guess kids will always find a reason to pick on someone , and a birthmark is an easy target- doesn’t make it any easier though I imagine?

@brunel55 I was told the risk of me scarring that badly was around 5%, so even less when you consider I had the surgery twice! That might give you an idea of how low the risk of bad scarring is. I'm white British, the risk would be higher if you're from a BAME community.

Kids will call names over anything and I probably suffered more for being a bit geeky than the birthmark! But at the time the surgery seemed like a no-brainer with no risks. I don't regret taking the chance but do think it's a complicated decision and it's perfectly possible to be happy and confident with a facial birthmark. :)

Sometimes they offer medical treatment OP depending on the type of birth mark/lesion. If my son had needed treatment for his (one of them was in his mouth essentially causing a lip tie which interefered with feeding) they would have started with a medication to reduce the blood vessels/blood flow before going to a surgery or laser option. If you have already been referred to dermatology I would wait and see what they say as otherwise you would be second guessing when it comes to surgery/laser/medical management. Surgical removal in under 5s is usually reserved for functional reasons for example if it was interfering with feeding, vision etc I doubt they would surgically remove on the NHS for purely cosmetic reasons.

My daughter was born with a large (10cm plus) dark brown nevus on the side of her head. She's now 7 and it has faded completely. The hair is slightly different, but she's accepting of that. Caring Matters Now charity (for congenital melanocytic nevus) were a great source of support and research. Lots of stories of children who have and havent had them surgically removed. Changing Faces charity also has lots of support, like what to say to someone who's staring, how to talk to your child about it. I can't recall the details now but because my Dd's was large (I think) she needed scans of brain and spine. Might be worth checking.

Not a facial birthmark but kids at school will likely just accept that as being him

I remember my daughter aged about 15 mentioning in passing something about the way one of the boys she had been to primary school with holds a pen because he only had 2 fingers (known the kid since they were three from birthday parties etc - I'd never noticed) asked why she had not mentioned his hand before, she shrugged and said why would she, it would be like saying he had brown hair
Little kids do just accept things

I did used to work with a man who had been born with a facial birthmark and had horrific scarring on his face (far far worse that I imagine birth mark was) which was down to them trying to remove the mark as a child - however as he was my dads age (so would be mid 70s now) I imagine treatment has come on leaps and bounds

My daughter now nine has/had a 'strawberry' on her face. It's between her nose and her mouth. As a baby/toddler it was bright red and very raised. Over the years it has faded and stopped growing. Now, despite its prominent position, you have to really look to see it- it's pea sized, and very pale pink.

She has never had a child comment negatively on it. Or her speech problems. Or her dyslexia. She will probably never be a super model, but it's not limiting in any way.

The only medical input we've had is for the 'care' side- they get bleed profusely if cut, and not stop. Luckily we've never had a problem.

Interesting thread. My DS is 3 and has quite a large birthmark on his forehead. Throughout the years we've been told it will fade, but it only has slightly. He has a long fringe so we don't really notice it unless he is hot or crying. I'm also concerned about school and called the GP this week.

His perspective was that they def won't remove on NHS as only cosmetic, which I knew was the case. I mentioned private laser and he talked about whether we were comfortable taking away our DS's bodily autonomy by deciding to remove it. I hadn't thought of it like that. I said I was worried about bullying, but he said we should consider letting him choose whether to have removal when he's older. It did resonate with me and I'm less inclined to go private now.

Feel like we'll be wrong whatever though! If we get it removed, will he feel we've taken a part of him away or if we do nothing will he blame us if he gets bullied? Difficult judgment. The GP said he was happy to do a private referral letter and left it to us to decide.

My son has a strawberry birthmark all up his leg that they said would fade but it grew with him until recently when it does seem to be fading. Hes a teen though so it took it's time. He had a teacher at primary school ask him what he had done to his leg when he got changed for PE which I wasn't impressed about but didn't say anything. Do whatever you think is best OP.

I have a haemangioma that covers the right hand side of my face. Please feel free to dm me. I’ll send you some then and now photos. It should put your mind at ease.

YABU to want to remove something cosmetic that is part of your child and will become part of his identity, like some other posters on this thread.

Bullies will find something to pick on even if there isn't anything obvious.

I am proud of my unusual birthmark (though it isn't on my face).

I have a stork mark in the centre of my forehead. It was very prominent when I was younger. I don't really notice it! Some people do mention it if it's cold and think I have hurt my head. It's never bothered me! It did bother my Mams auntie who said that my parents must be devastated by this mark 🙄🙄
My little girl has a stork mark (it isn't as prominent as mine was as a baby), my nanna had one and my mam has one on her philtrum.
It's part of who we are, it doesn't need to be erased

Photos of my DDs face as a baby Vs now (9yo), with no treatment- so it's still there, but you have to look for it.

Thanks for everyone for their input - a very interesting read indeed ( despite all the acronyms which are new to me!)
For those who think I am being unreasonable please do not insult me - those who are parents would or should understand it’s an added worry , I cannot help the way I feel hence the post. If we did decide to go down the removal road then this is certainly not a decision we will take lightly but your comments and experiences have been very helpful so thanks- food for thought xx

DH had quite a prominent one on his face which kept growing and was close to his eye. He had it removed when he was about 7 or 8 I think....there is a bit of a scar there but it was done a while ago so presumably methods are better now?

My 10 month old has a Hemangioma on her eyelid.( Which is blood vessels so is basically a strawberry birthmark But a deep one so doesn't appear like a typical one as it's under the skin)

It appeared at about 4 weeks as just a tiny lump on her eyelid still skin coloured at this point but I took her out of hours that day. I then took her every 2 weeks as it got bigger and redder and got told blocked tear duct by numerous doctors, nurses, HV.

The last time I took her at 3 months it was a locum doctor who referred her to paediatrics at my local hospital who saw her that week and they immediately knew what it was and reffered as to Great Ormond Street there and then.

She started medication 3 times a day immediately due to it being on her eyelid but they don't usually treat unless it's in a potentially dangerous position or ulcerating but that happens more with superficial or mixed ones where they are deep and superficial.
Most of these go in there own by the time they are 5-7 without treatment.

It's pretty much gone now at 10
Months and she will hopefully stop medication soon. My other 2 children don't have any birthmarks.
One picture is Just before treatment But at times it looked bigger and very blue like a deep bruise and The other picture is now.

I was born with a birthmark on my face and to be honest I'm surprised at the number of people saying it won't cause any issues. Whilst I'm happy for people who have encountered no problems due to theirs, I did experience bullying and self-esteem issues due to mine. I had it removed at age 13, and frankly I think I should have done it earlier than that but I was afraid of the operation.

I do have a scar, but I like my scar, whereas the birthmark was ugly. Had I never had it removed, I believe it would have made life more difficult for me.

Of course it all depends on what kind of birthmark it is, how big it is, the individual person, etc, but I reject the idea that my birthmark was part of who I am and I certainly wasn't proud of it.

I have one just under my left eye. I hate it but was never bullied for it. As PPs say children do just accept. I went for a lot of laser surgery and in the end it wasn't making much difference so I stopped. I am open to going again but I went for years and it was a pain!