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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Masks in soft play and children’s activities

67 replies

Snailsetssail · 14/08/2020 07:56

I just need a rant!

The only place it seems I can interact and play with my daughter properly over winter is going to be our own home. I was so looking forward to taking her to groups and activities but they all require face masks which I find difficult to wear, she gets distressed at, and they are bad for her communication development. I might as well go back to work and send her to nursery where she can enjoy more activities without adults in face-coverings!

Does this mean food can’t be served at soft play venues anymore? Or can I not wear a mask as long as I’m poking a chip into my mouth every few minutes? Or sipping a cup of tea for hours on end?

My 3 year old was so looking forward to being able to go to soft play again and my 1 year old is going to miss out on all the groups I did with her brother when he was younger.

OP posts:
funinthesun19 · 14/08/2020 08:46

Throw some cushions on the floor and fill a space with some plastic balls. Soft play at home.

That’s just called “cushions and balls scattered on the floor” and would probably last all of 5 minutes.

Midsommar · 14/08/2020 08:46

"they all require face masks which I find difficult to wear, she gets distressed at, and they are bad for her communication development" - to be honest OP this sounds like a huge overreaction, especially your last point. It is a temporary measure; stop scraping the barrel for an excuse not to wear one!

SkatingWithBears · 14/08/2020 08:49

I do think people are going a bit mad with anything relating to children. Yet as people say cafe etc they’ll sit close. For example I went to the Barbican centre. In the restaurant you can sit fairly close and move around. In the adult library you can enter and mill around freely, as long as you exit/ enter on the one way route. A few adults. The children’s library was allowing one family group at a time. It’s a big library, most the size of my local library, but with one child and adult in there we were t allowed in. We could though stand in the main library, where another family could also wait, in a far far smaller space with other people browsing the shelves around us. Far more people in a space. I just feel it’s a lot of bizarre decisions being made, and a hyper focus on children.

I’m also in the camp of stopping going to places such a as the cinema, shops etc with the new rules. They are fun, but I can get by without it all so I am. I get online deliveries, stopped clothes shopping, going to places etc. It’s the year of the play date...

JoeCalFuckingZaghe · 14/08/2020 08:52

You've got several months between now and winter. You say you can wear a mask for short time periods. Could you work on desensitising yourself and your child to them. The more you wear a mask the less distressing it becomes. Obviously this won't apply to everyone but isn't it worth trying in the house to wear one for a minute then take it off, repeat through the day. Then the next day 2 minutes and repeat. Build up and it does get easier. The first time I wore one on a 20 minute bus ride I had to get off after 5 minutes and walk the rest of the way as I had a panic attack. Now, I could probably wear one for hours just by desensitising myself to it.

Camomila · 14/08/2020 08:53

Personally I wouldn't mind if more children's activities opened as long as adults wore masks. I probably wouldn't go to soft play/toddler groups but I might go to organised classes at the children's centre etc.

and they are bad for her communication development
I would try not to worry too much, Italy has a good reputation for early years education (eg Reggio Emilia, Montessori) and nurserys are reopening with carers in masks (saw it on the Italian news).

Budapestpest · 14/08/2020 08:53

I do understand how you feel op but those people who work on the front line will feel it’s not fair, those who are ill or dying will think it’s not fair.
It’s not fair, absolutely not fair to anyone, but what are we going to do make it fair to everyone??? Absolutely not a thing can be done to make it fair. I get the govt rules are frustrating and contradictory at many times, which is annoying, but we have to accept it or be miserable.

Winterwoollies · 14/08/2020 08:53

I’d have thought Covid I’d the least of your worries at soft play. Everyone seems to pick up a tummy bug on every visit, which illustrates how filthy they are. They’ll be impossible to keep clean. 🤢

SchrodingersImmigrant · 14/08/2020 08:57

Have you tried different types? I found the surgical ones so incredibly annoying when I had to use them. Larger cotton ones, with nose strip are completely different game.

The 1 year old will be distracted by playing rather than your mask

isabellerossignol · 14/08/2020 08:59

My kids are past the age of soft play, which is great. But they never picked up any illnesses from going to one.

FelicityPike · 14/08/2020 08:59

I don’t know how they’re going to able to clean, sanitise and disinfect the entire soft play area every day (at least!) when they couldn’t do it before the virus.
Have you ever seen the floor of a ball pool? Imagine the germs in it! Ugh.

Emeraldshamrock · 14/08/2020 08:59

Do certain really believe all this is to infringe their DC's development.
There is plenty of outdoor activities in winter. Soft play has always been a hot bed for germs and mini wars prior to the pandemic.

Raella50 · 14/08/2020 09:02

I sympathise OP! Having little ones myself, I usually really appreciate being able to take them to soft play and burn off energy. We spend a lot of time outdoors, at the park, walking the dog, playing at home too. I won’t be going whilst you have to wear masks though. The littlest one finds them upsetting and pulls them on my face constantly. It’s also always hot in those places and I find masks wholly uncomfortable. I can’t understand why they can go to nursery with unmasked staff but not be at a baby group with their own parent unmasked?! A lot of baby groups are small and could easily be bubbles because we pay in advance so we know it’s the same people each time.

isabellerossignol · 14/08/2020 09:03

The soft play I used to take my kids to used to constantly have staff on a rota disinfecting the balls in the ball pit one by one. I always felt sorry for them as it looked so tedious. They'd take a big bag of balls out, clean them then take another bag out and throw the clean ones back in. I suppose once they were mixed they might theoretically have been cleaning the same balls over and over and some weren't cleaned at all, but they did it all day so presumably they must have caught most of the balls at some stage.

makingmammaries · 14/08/2020 09:05

This does sound a bit precious, OP, to be honest. As someone who, yes, lost a parent in early childhood. There’s serious shit, and then there’s everything else.

whattododo · 14/08/2020 09:11

Oh OP...seriously!! Stop being so bloody precious!!

Looneytune253 · 14/08/2020 09:20

I don't think I'll be hurrying back to soft play. They're scruffy at the best of times.

Mrsemcgregor · 14/08/2020 09:22

I wouldn’t worry too much about communication development. Most of that will happen in the home where (presumably) you don’t wear masks. For the short times you are wearing a mask and communicating in shops and soft play think of it as a chance to develop non-verbal communication. It’s a good life skill to be able to interpret body language.

It’s also fun to teach little ones some makaton, they use it a lot in schools and playgroups and it’s inclusive for everyone to know a few basics. What a great time to start! (I say this as someone with a nephew who is dependant on and who’s world lights up when another kid knows a few signs)

It’s ok to feel disappointed that you can’t have life the way you want it right now, but try not to let it get the better of you. Flowers

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 14/08/2020 09:22

This does sound a bit precious, OP, to be honest. As someone who, yes, lost a parent in early childhood. There’s serious shit, and then there’s everything else well as someone else who lost a parent as a child I can say people are vile, constantly telling parents “nothing is as bad as covid or death”- sorry but I want more for my child! Go tell the adults in the pubs that their drink isn’t worth death and let the kids crack on

ErinBrockovich · 14/08/2020 09:25

Our local soft play is reopening in a couple of weeks. Cafe fully open, outside play area fully open, they’ve installed a sandpit and put the little tykes cars outside. The inside frame is taped off.
They are finding ways around this stuff (weather dependent). I don’t think they’ll be closed the whole of winter and I’d rather have them open up and suffer the mask.

makingmammaries · 14/08/2020 09:29

Go tell the adults in the pubs that their drink isn’t worth death and let the kids crack on

Of course their drink isn’t worth death. Complete idiocy to open the pubs. Still no need to be precious about having to wear a mask at soft play. Actually I want more for my kids than a cesspit of snot-covered balls, but each to his own. Adults keep their masks on because they’re, well, adults.

Breckenridged · 14/08/2020 09:35

OP I think you’re being very precious about the mask but also understand the need to rant, and it IS disappointing not being able to give younger siblings the experiences that you’ve enjoyed with your older kids.

Do you have any outdoor preschool groups near you? We have a couple of really lovely ones and those are the only groups I’d really want to take my child to this winter. Masks not required outdoors yet if that is such a huge problem for you.

Emeraldshamrock · 14/08/2020 09:39

Go tell the adults in the pubs that their drink isn’t worth death and let the kids crack on
The pubs should be shut or at least monitored to allow people no more than 2 hours.
Numbers are rising all over the world daily.
Schools should be a priority.
I can't see pubs opening in Ireland until October the schools need to get back with as little interference from irresponsible adults.

Brieminewine · 14/08/2020 09:39

I think some times you just have to pick your battles, the masks are going no where anytime soon, I’m just happy the soft plays and baby classes are restarting and if I have to wear a mask then so be it. I wear it all day when at work anyway so what’s another hour.

BikeTyson · 14/08/2020 09:41

Yeah it’s shit. I understand why and will obey whatever rules are put in place, but it’s shit and it’s ok to say that. I’m sure someone will be along soon to tell me I’ll be more uncomfortable on a ventilator or it’ll be more shit when I’m dead.

minnieok · 14/08/2020 09:55

In some countries 3 year olds are wearing masks, animal ones with whiskers etc look super cute too. Kids aren't going to be traumatised by you wearing a mask, you getting sick with affect them far more! I think my kids went to soft play less than half a dozen times in their childhood, they are adults (lives turned upside down by covid as university is now online) would be so much easier if my only problem was masks in soft play!