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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to give my neighbours living room and kitchen a quick clean.

461 replies

Casschops · 11/08/2020 10:51

My lovely neighbours have gone away on their holidays they don't have much money although work reaaaaally hard and juggle their childcare of their 10 year old son. They have gone to stay in annex of their relations home so have an absolute minmum on their holiday, a friend even drove them their as they struggle with money so much. Im feeding their cat. I saw the man chucking their vacum cleaner in the bin the other week and he was laughing saying they can't afford a new one ATM. The cat has been sick on the floor and flicked cat litter everywhere which I have cleaned up but I can tell that for some weeks they have swept the carpet and floor and there is a thin layer of cat hair and bits in corner of the rooms. It lools like it needs a good vacum the cat has also been walking on woŕktops in the kitchen and there are footprints on things generally lookin a bit hairy and in need of a good wipe as are the windowledges where he sits.
Would they think it odd if I gave everything a wipe down in kitchen and living room as well as mopped the kitchen floor and vacuumed the carpet. I just want them to come home to a nice fresh house or is this intrusive? I am absolutely not looking for people's judgement about levels of tidiness but would it be nice to give things a quick once over or just too much? We say hi on the street and chat but have never socialized with them just to give an idea of our relationship.
Thanks for any input.

OP posts:
User43210 · 11/08/2020 13:19

@Casschops Please do it, you sound like a dream. You've mentioned you won't go anywhere that you're not meant to access, so you're not intruding on their privacy.

I'm sure they would appreciate it, but certainly say because the cat was sick and the litter was spilt, you wanted to give it a once-over so they could relax when they return! Surely they would be grateful! Also just say you brought your hoover either because you didn't want to go snooping for theirs or, if they know you're properly aware, you remember DH binning it.

chargeorge · 11/08/2020 13:19

I think that's a great idea, my neighbour did it for me for when I got home earlier in the year, it was a lovely surprise Smile

Dcadmam001 · 11/08/2020 13:21

Have your got a contact number for them? If so text and say cat made mess in kitchen would it be ok if you took Hoover over to sort cat litter mess out?

stardance · 11/08/2020 13:22

It's clear that you'd be doing it for the right reasons, you sound like a lovely neighbour! I wouldn't be offended if someone did this for me, it's just a quick hoover and wipe. Not like you're rearranging cupboards or throwing things out! Just say the cat had left a mess and you thought it'd be nice for them to not have to deal with that when they get home.

lborgia · 11/08/2020 13:22

Similar situation, and my friends loved it, well at least we’re still friends so I think so. I’d do it and blame it entirely on the cat. (That the cat made a mess, not that the cat did the hoovering).

I do have a pretty low bar for helpful people though. I once came back from a very long haul trip and through the haze realised that there were baskets of clean folded laundry where before there were not. My FIL had done our washing for us because it was obvious I hadn’t had time before I left Blush. My tatty grey knickers were carefully folded on top.

He is an incredibly good man, and it’s not as creepy as it might sound, but omg I still havne’t got over it 8 years later.

TokyoSushi · 11/08/2020 13:23

Not RTFT but I agree, do a quick whizz around the downstairs only and blame it entirely on the cat!

Butternutter01 · 11/08/2020 13:25

I would do it and just leave a note to say you hope they had a nice holiday. If they’re as struggling for money as you say, I’d get them some milk and bread too so they don’t have to go out to the shop.

WitchQueenofDarkness · 11/08/2020 13:25

My cat is an extremely messy litter box user and generally chooses the middle of the floor to deposit furballs so I'd find a story that the cat had made a horrible mess that you didn't want to leave for them entirely believable.

astridforty · 11/08/2020 13:26

@donquixotedelamancha 😂😂

Streamingbannersofdawn · 11/08/2020 13:28

I'd just do the downstairs. If you did this for me I would love you forever. I am however one of those people who cleans before I go on holiday just so I can come back to a clean and tidy house (I consider it a treat for myself).

I have a lady who comes to feed my pets while I'm away. This time she watered all the plants without being asked. I was very grateful and didn't think it was intrusive at all.

custardbear · 11/08/2020 13:29

If you do then be honest. I vacuumed your carpet because the cat shed lots of hair and spread litter around so I had a quick Hoover I hope they was ok. And yes timwiping the sides of the cat walked on them

Don't venture anywhere else - my dad and his wife had an employee (at their pub) who saw it as being ok to clean their whole flat in the same situation, changed and washed bedsheets, and emptied their washing basket and washed it, including their underwear 😱 my dads wife (bitxh though she was) was devastated ... saying that she was filthy considering her role in the business was the cleaning, and my dad ran the finances, ordering and bar (I remember finding whole fried eggs and such like down the side of their cooker too, it was thick with food and yeuk - it wasn't too small an area either to get into - I'm surprised they didn't have rats!

melj1213 · 11/08/2020 13:29

I think it's a lovely thing to do and not outside the reach of something that you would do as part of the cat sitting to have them return to the house as they left it (or in this case slightly better due to the tools used)

They asked you to care for the cat, part of that includes basic cleaning to have the house in the same state as they left it. I wouldnt go out of my way to mention it, I'd just mention it in when they get back as part of the update on the cat sitting in general. "Hope you had a great trip away, the cat has been fine except for the day she was sick. Since I know your hoover packed up just before you left I brought mine over to clean it up as she had also tracked litter everywhere and I gave the side a wipe down too, just in case she had walked on it. Seems like it was a one off so doesnt seem to be anything to worry about ... anyway tell me about what you got up to on your holiday?"

If the cat has walked along the worktops and left paw marks then it is not overstepping to give them a quick wipe down so they come home to clean surfaces. It would be overstepping if you removed everything from the worktops, scrubbed them down and rearranged everything to your liking. The same with the floors - the cat has been shedding and tracking litter around while they have been away, presumably they would usually clean it but since they're away it has accumulated so it is not unreasonable for you to clean it up. If their hoover was available then you'd just give it a quick once over to clear up the cat mess, but since theirs isn't available you brought yours round, and you can hardly just hoover one small patch of carpet. It would only be overstepping if you hoovered the whole house, moved furniture, scrubbed skirting boards etc.

Lifeisconfusing · 11/08/2020 13:31

My mil and fil once went on holiday they aren’t very clean or tidy. Me and my dh decided to gut the house and make it immaculate for them coming home. They where mortified so I guess it depends.

If I where you I would probably give it a clean and hoover and just say the cat spilt some food or brought a bird in what ever and you wanted to make sure it was clean and tidy for them coming home.

PepperPotty · 11/08/2020 13:32

I think you could say the cat was sick in the kitchen so you cleaned it up, and you ran a vacuum round as they mentioned theirs was broken.

dooratheexplorer · 11/08/2020 13:32

No don't, it makes you look very judgey...........

Lots of people live in a shit tip .

Katjolo · 11/08/2020 13:32

What a lovely idea. I would and just blame the cat!

SirGawain · 11/08/2020 13:33

@Scruffyoak

I would be over the moon if someone done this for me! Once someone feeding our cat left some bread, milk and sweets on table for when we got home..
So you think someone implying that your house is filthy is a compliment then.
ValleyoftheTrolls · 11/08/2020 13:33

Will no one think of the cat? Poor thing, getting all the blame! 😹

Do it OP, I think it’s a lovely gesture and hopefully they will be happy and not offended.

PepperPotty · 11/08/2020 13:34

My parents let themselves into our house while we were away to do some DIY jobs we hadn't got round to. On the one hand it was a nice gesture and helpful, but it did feel quite intrusive as well as we hadn't asked them to do it and it was nothing urgent. It's a difficult one.

PepperPotty · 11/08/2020 13:35

Will no one think of the cat? Poor thing, getting all the blame! 😹

Grin scapecat

LagunaBubbles · 11/08/2020 13:37

Why are you in their house?

Why didn't you at least read the first post?

needaMNnamegenerator · 11/08/2020 13:38

I have a messy home and tbh I would feel judged if someone looking after my house cleaned. MIL does stuff like this plus reorganising my cupboards etc and I don't like it. However if you made it clear that you were cleaning up after the cat, not me, then I'd be grateful.

You're obviously a really nice person for not only thinking of this but also thinking of their feelings.

So, make sure you let them know that the cat spread litter so you hoovered then it should be well received I reckon.

Disfordarkchocolate · 11/08/2020 13:38

I would just let them know you had a quick hoover etc because the cat had made a mess. Just don't do to much. Perhaps a welcome home meal in the fridge?

Saucery · 11/08/2020 13:38

@ValleyoftheTrolls

Will no one think of the cat? Poor thing, getting all the blame! 😹

Do it OP, I think it’s a lovely gesture and hopefully they will be happy and not offended.

The cat will sit there, desperately trying to communicate the fact that it did not vomit all over the downstairs, thank you very much Grin
Afwan · 11/08/2020 13:38

Another one jumping in to say I would consider it a lovely gesture and take it for just that.

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