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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Is it normal to hate your job?

147 replies

Fuschia657 · 10/08/2020 13:32

Trying to work out whether I’m just being a moaner or whether this is not normal. On a day to day basis, if you have a job (full time really), do you like it? Like, really, do you feel happy on a day to day basis?

I’m finding more and more than I’m struggling for any motivation whatsoever - it’s boring me to death but at the same time I feel overwhelmed with demands and stress, could work evenings and weekends and still have more to do (senior level corporate job, for context). Working from home probably doesn’t help!

So AIBU - is it normal to hate your job? Am I just being pathetic?

OP posts:
lockdownalli · 10/08/2020 15:57

@WhereamI88 that sounds pretty serious.

I have had similar thoughts in the past with other jobs so I do understand. I seriously considered breaking my own arm at one point Sad

Have you thought about how feasible it would be to transfer to a more rewarding sector such as Family or Employment? Flowers You wouldn't get the pay but you don't sund to me like you will last another month, never mind another year.

Ticklemelmo · 10/08/2020 15:57

Eurgh I feel ya.
I'm on maternity and im absolutely dreading back. 50% of hating it was due to wanting to WFH back then and some bitterness that some of my colleagues were allowed. I'll now be going back to WFH full time and I'm still just dreading it. I was planning on changing jobs on return but I'll be saving hundreds on travel and child care so gonna try suck it up.

Northernsoullover · 10/08/2020 16:00

I've had jobs I've loved. British Gas customer service. Very social, I really enjoyed solving problems. I was agency and the money was shit and then they changed the role to sales so I left. Then I sold advertising space in a niche magazine. I loved it. Then a new manager came in and sucked the joy out of it so I left. I'm now a cleaner. I mostly love it but I'm retraining as I'm getting on a bit. I have had jobs I've hated. Its usually managers that make a place miserable.

WhereamI88 · 10/08/2020 16:06

@lockdownalli I tried! I was offered 3 second stage interviews with 3 different companies when lockdown happened! I had worked so hard to get to that point and it was looking very promising and then they all decided not to hire anyone due to Covid.

So I'm stuck now but in a considerably worse mental position. I can barely get myself to do my job and my self esteem is rock bottom because I know I am not performing well anymore. But resigning isn't an option given how horrific the economy is looking! Every single analyst thinks there's going to be a recession much worse than 2008 so the only thing to do is stick it out really.

Oly4 · 10/08/2020 16:09

I love my job and always have. I feel lucky

witheringrowan · 10/08/2020 16:13

I feel utterly apathetic towards my current job. I've only been in this role for a couple of months, but I'm already very bored, and in part because it's WFH there is hardly any contact with co-workers. There's very little for me to do, my manager seems to have very low expectations and people aren't really encouraged to collaborate or innovate. Like a PP mentioned, I feel like all my skills are slipping away. The irony is this is a role I'd thought I wanted since school.

I had a love-hate relationship with my previous job. There were parts of it that drove me mad. But I had a great friendly team, and got to work on some really interesting issues. I also got a much bigger sense of achievement when projects were finished.

I think the biggest factor is the team you work with. A supportive environment helps you approach the job with a much better mindset. When you have a team filled with people who are just marking time it's soul destroying.

SnuggyBuggy · 10/08/2020 16:15

I agree you can cope with a lot more crap when you have a decent team

Oblomov20 · 10/08/2020 16:21

I've always loved my jobs. The one I have now is part time. I've been there 8 years.

In the last 2 years I've taken a number of second part time jobs. Alongside my old part time job. All have been awful. the one I have at the moment is exceptionally awful.

WearyandBleary · 10/08/2020 16:22

I hate my job. I think you get to a certain seniority when it’s actually rather dull / corporate / hard and that’s not as fun as the stuff that happens on the ground. It’s sort of good pay or good fun IMO.

Agree with other that WFH also makes things much more bleak and isolating.

Flynn999 · 10/08/2020 16:25

I had jobs I hated; workload, people, office. Etc. Currently I love my job. Looking forward to going back :)

Mia1415 · 10/08/2020 16:28

30% of the time I love my job. Around 60% of the time I quite like it and around 10% of the time I hate it.

I couldn't stay in a job I hate. Life is just too short for that.

Sootikinstew · 10/08/2020 16:30

I'd say it's sadly common but shouldn't be labelled as 'normal'

Figure out what you want to do op and and go do it. Life's too short!

Dazzedandconfused · 10/08/2020 16:32

I think the majority of people hate their jobs or at least find them boring and unfulfilling. I'm about to embark on a masters part time to facilitate a career change which means sticking with my boring but flexible job until I'm in the position to pursue a career I'm passionate about. However, I did initally love my job when I started 12 years ago but the monotony, politics and megalomaniac bosses have made it insufferable! Hoping my new career wont be the same but I suspect it will be!

SnuggyBuggy · 10/08/2020 16:33

See I'm not convinced I'd actually like any job to be honest

Serialcatmum · 10/08/2020 16:34

Have you considered having a careers guidance session? It’s not like they were when we were at school! (Figure if you’re still for 30 years+ you can’t be too far ahead of me!)

They are free and they can be done over the phone. I often speak to people that are just fed up of their job. It just allows you to reflect on your current circumstances in a safe place. I’m still training in the role so wouldn’t be the best person 🤣 but NCS are super easy to contact via Facebook! Good luck!

KetoPenguin · 10/08/2020 16:47

I don't really like my job but I like to work and I like some of the people I work with. I identify with what OP said about finding their job both boring on a day to day basis but also stressful. In fact my job is only PT but I know a lot of my co-workers said they find it very stressful too. Also I picked a job that fitted my lifestyle but it doesn't really suit my talents, so I always feel I am not doing it as well as other people who work faster and are more organised or better with people than me. My problem is I don't really know what I would like to do instead, and I don't want to waste money and effort retraining in something I still wouldn't like.

Babymamaroon · 10/08/2020 16:47

YANBU. I'm in a senior corporate job and would drop hit like a hot stone if I won the lottery!

There are so many things I would rather be doing every day other than exhausting myself and being put under relentless pressure to deliver.

Chottie · 10/08/2020 16:49

@beefthief

It's normal for work to push more and more on you, until you can't cope. Need to keep you on the line. Get as much out of you as they can. You're a resource to them, like any other, and they will take as much as they can while giving you as little as possible back. Every minute you work for free, you're donating your most precious and limited resource - time - to a business that can presumably afford to pay you for that time. The company as a whole does not see you as human and purely a means to keep making money -- money extracted from your bonus labour.

Scale back the work you do and keep cashing your paycheque. If it becomes too much, move on.

Sadly this is so very true.....

The only thing that matters is the bottom line on the balance sheet.... :(

Mary46 · 10/08/2020 16:51

Mine quite mind numbing processing orders. It wasnt renewed since covid. Thank godSmile

Gobbycop · 10/08/2020 16:56

I'd rather not be at work but I enjoy it.

Good people, good pay.

TitanicWasAGreatMovie · 10/08/2020 17:08

I don’t hate my job, but increasingly I feel anxious about it. Its v corporate and a pretty good place to work in terms of money and perks - which makes me feel ungrateful and trapped.

I was so happy to be away from my last toxic job, but now I miss my old colleagues and knowing what I am doing!

I often wonder what its like to have a job you genuinely love.

DrownedDuffers · 10/08/2020 17:10

My actual job is frustrating and sometimes dull but WFH has meant the part I enjoy (discussing matters with colleagues, being out of the house) doesn't happen.

I am also frustrated with the organisation in many respects but too junior to change anything (although have made my views known) and am starting a degree soon which I hope will lead to a completely different job.

ageingdisgracefully · 10/08/2020 17:11

I've always had a love/hate relationship with work. It's rarely the work that's the problem, it's the bloody workplace..grrrrr.

I also suffer quite badly from Imposter Syndrome which is draining.

Ineverdidmind · 10/08/2020 17:12

No, I really don't hate my job, I actually mostly quite enjoy it.
I've been in jobs I've hated in the past and it was soul destroying, so you have my sympathies.

I'm 42 and still in the process of retraining for a professional career, I have a few exams left to go. Its been a slog but very worth it. Is there any way you could change jobs? I used to feel stuck but I discovered where there's a will there's a way.

TitanicWasAGreatMovie · 10/08/2020 17:14

Also Grin to whomever up thread said they weren’t sure they were really cut out for work... me neither!!