To think I have wasted my life

[easterbunny123]

I'm 29 and been in a few long term relationships which have never worked out, always ended by me as i go for the same type, lazy, obsessed with computers and games and just not suited to me.
Just realised the currently relationship has to end for the same reason but I'm scared that I've wasted my life. I want children but feel it's too late. AIBU to think I will end up old and single with a big list of exes?

@ChrisPrattsFace

You’re 29? Seriously?!

Well when should she start thinking seriously about this do you think?

Previous relationships allow you to make a list of criteria future prospective partners need to fulfill for long term relationship viability. Maybe you need to cast your net away from your previous types. Do you have any hobbies or sports that would allow you to meet suitable prospective partners, if not maybe start one. 29 or early 30's is not too late to find a life companion or to start a family, don't get dejected. Go out into the world as a confident happy person and you will likely attract alot of male attention, it's up to you then who floats your boat. Good luck in your quest!

Of course it isn’t disrespectful GoshHashana

Ridiculous of you to suggest the OP can’t feel this way just because other people have left it later.

saleorbouy advice is good - I'd be focusing on how they behave and having common goals even early on in future relationships.

Change your type OP. Don't be a self fulfilling prophecy! Reassess your life and go for what you want. 29 is so young. I clicked on your post thinking you would be in your seventies (which is also not to too late to find a new partner, I hasten to add!)

You haven't wasted your life at all, but it's good that you are thinking about this while you are still young enough to make changes and work out what you really want. I would love to be able to go back to age 29 knowing what I know now, and would make a few different decisions. But don't just think about what kind of relationship will make you happy and when/if you want to have kids. I wish I'd thought more about all kinds of things - career, education, financial stuff and personal interests and ambitions.

I was dumped by my husband at 29, I am now 50 with a wonderful husband and 2 children don't worry you are fine

I met my future DH at 29. We got married 8 years later and has DS just over a year later.

Are you having a laugh? This thread is actually quite disrespectful to women who genuinely have left it too late. I feel sorry for anyone in that position who is reading this from a 29-year-old.

I see what you mean and now being in my late 30s, 29 still seems young to me; however people are allowed to feel that way at 29 too. I remember feeling it was a massive threshold and I hadn't achieved what I thought I would at that age, plenty of people have a wobble or concerns, it's a bit unkind to be dismissive.

Wow, I didn't expect to get so many replies. Feeling a bit better about it all. Definitely not a disrespect to people older than me, a big issue is social media and all the people in long happy relationships by my age which you just can't help but compare your own life to.
Also this was not meant to be disrespectful to gamers, I'm sure most gamers are active, happy and successful people, just the ones I have been with tend to be lazy and unhelpful around the house and often bitter toward more active people.

"a big issue is social media and all the people in long happy relationships by my age which you just can't help but compare your own life to."

In my experience, the more a couple posts about their happy relationship on social media, the less happy the relationship actually is in real life. Not always obviously, but don't believe the perfectly filtered photos. One of my colleagues is constantly posting on social media with happy photos of her husband and baby, but she's been having an affair for the past year.

Try not to compare yourself too much to other people, comparison is the thief of joy as they say.

a big issue is social media and all the people in long happy relationships by my age which you just can't help but compare your own life to.

Don’t compare. There are huge advantages in not settling down too young. Sometimes (definitely not always) couples who get together in their teens or early twenties hold each other back or limit their horizons, in one way or another, or people settle for their first love without getting the chance to see what’s out there in the big bad world. You don’t know that if you’d settled down at a young age, it would have been a positive experience.

Do you live in a small town? Do you live where you’ve always lived? I’m only asking because your friends sound a bit uniform and stifling.

What’s your job? Do you have bigger career plans? Is there anywhere you’d like to live? Qualifications you’d like to do? I really would leave men alone for a year or two and put some energy into your own wants, dreams and ambitions. When you’re happy and fulfilled, you tend to make better choices and attract healthy people.

In the nicest possible way.. GET A GRIP! You’re 29, the whole world is at your feet.