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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be just letting my kids play normally with other kids in the playground

81 replies

OverTheRainbow88 · 07/08/2020 13:15

As above really... tried to enforce a bit of social distancing in playground with other kids but now decided it’s impossible so have given up trying!

OP posts:
Brieminewine · 07/08/2020 14:54

Nope not unreasonable at all, it’s unnatural to expect little children to be so detached from others. If people have a problem with it then I don’t think the playground is the place for them!

DumplingsAndStew · 07/08/2020 14:58

@LizzieMacQueen

It's 11 and under in Scotland (under 12) My DC2 has not long turned 12 and every one of her friends is still 11 so after consulting with their parents, they all agreed they were happy for my DC to be involved in that and she's been meeting up with them a bit over the past few weeks. It's the only rule we've broken and I don't regret it one bit, as otherwise she wouldn't even have a chance to say goodbye to her friends of 7 years before she moves to a different school next week.

ThatDamnScientist · 07/08/2020 14:59

I have no problem with this, what I do have a problem with is if your child has a persistent cough and is not covering their mouth and you and the parent are just letting them - as per the child (who was following my younger child around and coughing less than and foot away from her face) and their parent this morning Angry

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/08/2020 15:01

The ridiculousness I struggle with is ok kids line up 2 metres apart to go on a slide- Hmm but then 40 kids use that slide one after the other with their hands touching It etc ....playgrounds are not sterile places, fortunately the under 10s are the least risky group to spread and catch this disease

TheTigerWho · 07/08/2020 15:05

I've found that even when they play normally together, they don't actually get all that close..? See saws are usually a minimum of 2 metres long, some of the swings are a bit close, but for that reason parks are taping one of them off, one child usually goes on the slide at one time. I think it's similar to walking down the street tbh. Definitely not as bad as some of the grown adults, shitfaced in pubs and restaurants all cuddled up and they're supposed to know better.

I think people are quick to blame young dcs for ruinin everfing . It's a really ugly habit tbh as they are among the easiest targets and can't really defend themselves... Funny how some people take their issues out on little kids isn't it?

DappledThings · 07/08/2020 15:06

We have a big play park near us, huge structure full of tunnels, ladders and slides. It's been really busy recently with the normal children climbing up and down in all directions and going past each other in close proximity.

No way you could have distanced children there and nobody is bothered about it. If I was I wouldnt take my children there. If the council are they would shut it. Thankfully they haven't done so.

I want to know when NT and EH places will be reopening their play areas.

SleepingStandingUp · 07/08/2020 15:11

@Mywifeandkids1

Same, if people are really that scared they shouldn’t even be there In my opinion
So I shouldn't out my recently shielding child because you don't want to have to enforce boundaries with yours??
Hamm87 · 07/08/2020 15:31

Sorry but if the government wanted children to mix soft plays would be open if you can't keep your kid at least no touching each other they shouldn't be at the park sorry but I live Northumberland too and I would not be happy if you kid ran up an touched mine ect this is the reason my ds can't go to parks because parents can't control there kids

RubieRose · 07/08/2020 15:41

I'm not expecting my 5 and 7yo to socially distance, but they wouldn't run up and randomly touch another child anyway and I wouldn't take them anywhere that was too busy.

There is absolutely no point making children queue up socially distanced to use play equipment, when they're all using the same stuff 🤦🏽‍♀️

If you don't want your child near others then don't go to busy playgrounds, go early/ late when it's empty.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/08/2020 15:42

So I shouldn't out my recently shielding child because you don't want to have to enforce boundaries with yours?? common sense should tell you though that even a metre a part 100s of children touching equipment may not be the most sterile of environments if you have concerns.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 07/08/2020 15:42

Also soft play the issue there is it’s inside

SleepingStandingUp · 07/08/2020 15:49

@OnlyFoolsnMothers

So I shouldn't out my recently shielding child because you don't want to have to enforce boundaries with yours?? common sense should tell you though that even a metre a part 100s of children touching equipment may not be the most sterile of environments if you have concerns.
Bit that's for me to manage - whether I clean him, the slide or we just have a wander around. The point I was responding to was we wouldn't be there because it's impinging on others children's right to not have to abide by social distancing. At least op is checking with the other parent so they can say yes or no. Not just assume that anyone who dares to leave the house is fair game
NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite · 07/08/2020 15:51

I can’t teach my 19 month old to socially distance... and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural
Then don't take them anywhere that requires social distancing. If you can't parent properly there is no need to unleash your twattish behaviour on others.

SleepingStandingUp · 07/08/2020 15:55

I can’t teach my 19 month old to socially distance so you keep him in arms reach or by the hand
and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural I'm assuming they're not starting school September?

nether · 07/08/2020 15:58

common sense should tell you though that even a metre a part 100s of children touching equipment may not be the most sterile of environments if you have concerns

It does. And we mitigate for that by hand hygiene.

But that makes no difference to the need to be distanced. Theynare different aspects with different mitigations.

Please consider teaching your DC not to go up close to anyone, child or adult, without checking whether it's ok. And if it's not, to stay 2m minimum.

That way, the (recently deshielded) exceptionally vulnerable can still have outdoors leisure, and not go straight from isolation to ostracism

IceCreamAndCandyfloss · 07/08/2020 16:04

@Mywifeandkids1

Same, if people are really that scared they shouldn’t even be there In my opinion
No, it’s those that think the guidelines don’t apply to them that shouldn’t be there. Why should those following the advice to keep themselves and others safe be penalised by those who dont rules?

It’s not hard to teach children social distancing.

Arthersleep · 07/08/2020 16:08

I took my children to the park yesterday. They are very good at following instructions. Unfortunately this meant that, when other children broke the rules (including trying to climb onto the same swing that they were on), mine ended up hopping off to maintain social distance. It was so frustrating to see people not even trying to keep them apart. Our parish council has now closed the local play park after repeated breaches and warnings. So now all those who were following the rules have been punished too, just because some couldn't be bothered to adhere to them.

NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite · 07/08/2020 16:09

"I can’t teach my 19 month old to socially distance... and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural"
What happened to your child who, in your post on 27/05/2020, was 6 months old and couldn't sleep?

Arthersleep · 07/08/2020 16:10

And no, I'm not scared! I am being responsible and trying to prevent us from going into a second lockdown.

TheTigerWho · 07/08/2020 16:11

@NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite

I can’t teach my 19 month old to socially distance... and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural Then don't take them anywhere that requires social distancing. If you can't parent properly there is no need to unleash your twattish behaviour on others.
My ds is a little older and about to start nursery soon. The nursery have explicitly said it is unreasonable to expect children this young to understand social distancing. It is not improper parenting or twattish behaviour if your small toddler can't understand the guidance on social distancing, which changes every five minutes anyway.

DS is awfully unfriendly and screams if any other children come near him, so it isn't an issue for us, but I can imagine if we had a friendlier child, like my older one was, at that age it is actually quite difficult to explain. Not that people shouldn't tey, far from it. I just think that calling someone a bad parent and a twat if their 19 mo doesn't understand the 2 metre (1 metre?) rule.

That said, I still find mine don't get that close to other dcs at the park, even friends from scho etc. It's not really an interactive activity for mine.

DappledThings · 07/08/2020 16:11

and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural I'm assuming they're not starting school September?

My 4 year old is starting school in September. He is currently in nursery 3 days a week. They haven't expected the children to social distance at all at nursery and none of the information from the school suggests they will be either other than having the class split into 3 groups for different sessions in the first week.

NotEverythingIsBlackandWhite · 07/08/2020 16:15

Oh sorry, you later corrected yourself and said you missed out the 1 and said they were 16 months. (Then someone corrected you and said they are 18 months).

It must be sleep deprivation - as I'd expect a secondary school teacher or a tutor of 9 years or whatever to be able to add up. Mind you, I'd expect a teacher or a tutor not to behave twattishly in the playground at the park Grin

DappledThings · 07/08/2020 16:15

"I can’t teach my 19 month old to socially distance... and I don’t really want to make my 4 year old it’s unnatural"
What happened to your child who, in your post on 27/05/2020, was 6 months old and couldn't sleep?

The 6 was corrected to 16 as the 6 was a typo only a couple of comments down on that thread. Not sure why this thread warranted an AS but it wasnt a very effective one.

TheTigerWho · 07/08/2020 16:16

*try
*school

Merename · 07/08/2020 16:19

It’s really interesting reading this to be aware of other people’s views - I’m honestly surprised so many people would expect preschool children to be able to social distance and have fun in a playground. It’s maybe because I’m in Scotland and it’s not expected of us. But I know people who are worried about the risk who are still just not going to parks, and if my child was in a shielding category I also would not. I understand the feeling of unfairness in this case, but I just think it’s totally unrealistic to ask this of young children. And hovering over them reminding them to distance all the time is not good for them either, or relaxing for parents, I’d rather just take them to run about somewhere.