Is this an acceptable routine for the holidays?

[juliantwo]

I have 2 ds aged 9 and 6.

It just feels like we have been at home for such a long time and it's getting harder and harder to motivate them in the holidays.

My non-negotiables are:

Sit down meal at the table x3 a day
Reading practice for 30 mins a day
One outdoor activity ie walk or bike ride per day, whatever the weather. For at least an hour, depending on where we go.

I try to encourage them to play in the garden, play games like Dobble, uno, etc which they do quite happily.

The rest of the time, ALL they want to do is minecraft. They watch minecraft videos on you tube and then go On the switch and recreate stuff.

Should I be trying to limit screen time more? Give them more chores? It's just so hard to think of more ways to occupy them. We have two whole scrapbooks of crafting activities they did during proper lockdown and I feel totally spent of ideas and motivation because it was hard back then.

We'd usually meet up With friends but people either seem to be away or a bit cautious about meeting up. We have sometimes met friends for walks.

I am a teacher but do have bits and pieces of work to do in preparation for sept and we are also supposed to be moving house soon so I am trying to do some decluttering and packing.

I'm really feeling the minecraft guilt!

But waytoomuch82 - if your child is not a bookworm and/or is not sporty what do you suggest? Just leave it? Or still try to encourage? My DS (9) is profoundly dyslexic. Not at all a ‘bookworm’. Should I not encourage him ever to read? And whilst he is very “sporty” his usual activities of hockey, cricket, fencing and martial arts have been unavailable to him. I have taken the view that it is up to me to try to carve out some tile for him to pursue reading and other sporting activities. And encourage those. Fortunately he does like to cycle and has been doing plenty of that.

OP - sounds as though you are doing just great. I do echo the longer days out though. For variety and more stimulation.

www.treasuretrails.co.uk/

Someone posted this on here, these look great-I don’t have kids and I’d do them 😄
You sound like you’re doing a great job!

I have a 5 and 6 year old, and similar expectations. Go outside every day, read every day (6 year reads freely, 5 year old less impressed) and sit at the table to each breakfast/lunch (unless it's a picnic)/dinner.

I try to hold off on TV until at least 3pm, but they'd happily spend all day watching shit on YouTube.

I'm trying to make sure they do something meaningful every day of the hols, since actual holidays have all been rescheduled - play dates, days out, holiday club etc.

Thankfully both are very in Lego so they're happy to spend a lot of time with that.

Could you do some baking with them, or even other cooking such as helping to prepare the main meal? Also laying the table. Any other craft type things such as painting, papier mache etc.

Honestly mine are on electronics much more than I would like (aged 9-13) it’s getting harder to drag them out for a walk as that’s all we have been doing for the past 5 months!!! They are getting too old for most of the parks etc

DS2 age 9 like woodwork and has his own toolset (proper tools but child sized) so he’s made a big house and started making a den.
DD age 12 likes cooking so she’s been baking and also making sushi from scratch.
DS1 is the hardest. He’s 13 and has ASD so hard to get him to do anything apart from reading, drawing maps or playing video games

We have lots of board games so we play those.

It sounds like you're a fantastic mom with two great children!

@Waytoomuch82

The only chores they have

Pjs under pillow
Make bed
Turn of lights
Recycling
And eldest dyson hoovers the dining room after dinner

That’s it

Why does the make of your hoover matter?!

I have teens but have had similar expectations since the start of lockdown. At least an hour of exercise (they are very very sporty but at start of lockdown it took a bit of adjusting to having to run / cycle / workout alone), at least an hour of something else could be baking, more sport, music practise, reading etc and some chores. We eat lunch and dinner together and the rest of the free time is totally up tp them. I don't really have to enforce those things actually (excepy the chores) but it's good to have expectations

My DC love minecraft as well! My DC are 5 and 7. They got the new minecraft dungeons game and I've started playing it with them because it's not as boring as the main game! Completely going off point there........

Are you willing/able to get them out for any day trips etc? We've started trying to get out for more trips out. We did the local woods the other day and took a picnic, we go to the nearest town for a walk around the parks/gardens and the river. All of these kinds of things can be done with still socially distancing. We have been going out more and went to a theme park at the weekend etc. I'm sick of wallowing around at home constantly.

In my house we have set times for the Xbox. They get an hour in the morning so long as they are dressed and have had breakfast. Then an hour in the evening maybe after dinner. But if I didn’t tell them to come off it, they would be on it all day. So it’s good to set a timer and stick to the hour.

Similar ages and similar routines here.

We are on week 20 at home now and the end is in sight. At this stage, as long as they're outside a bit, read a bit, exercise a bit and aren't on screens too much then that's fine by me.

We go to Cornwall at the end of the month so lots of outside/activity then too.

They've been so good through this whole saga, that I'm just taking the path of least resistance at this stage!

We do the same @Waytoomuch82, if they want to watch one and it's too late for the whole thing. We just watched one over 3 evenings because DD wanted to watch it and her bedtime is earlier.
My two are in holiday club most days but they have TV in the morning, then an hour of tablet time AFTER going out for a walk or bike ride etc. They would never go out otherwise especially DS. If it's really tipping it down we might do yoga instead.
I haven't been making them do any school stuff except they both do Doodle Maths. DS reads anyway (especially in bed after lights out ). I'm going to have to get DD back into reading though as she's like your younger one.
We do have a bored jar - pick a lolly stick if you are bored. Mix of mildly school type things, craft, outside, chores, baking etc. They've both made a treasure hunt, DD loves her Mister Maker magazine.
I'm going to do stop motion animation with them if it rains on our cottage holiday I think.

Dyson hoovers?! 😂

I only mentioned dyson without ruining because I say to my son “pls can you get the dyson out” ie so he knows I don’t mean the main very heavy hoover!

I was a super skinny child who never did any exercise so I can totally sympathise with having to set exercise and you’re not a rubbish mum if they need to be prompted 🤣

Mine have been entertained by YouTube and minecraft for the past 6 months. Taught my eldest DC to read via google. 😂 Don’t be so hard on yourself... it’s been 6 months! Only so much you can do.

You are doing a great job OP!! They sound lovely

This is not by any means a normal summer holiday and I think we all need to give ourselves a break. My DS is spending a lot more time than I would like playing computer games, but given I have been trying to keep him occupied full time for months now I am tying not to sweat it. I try to make sure he does something else for at least part of every day but that is about it.

Lest I sound smug, we really have been lucky with the days of holiday club we've had.
This afternoon we are at a drive in movie!
But I'm glad we aren't trying to do homework/catch up.

Crikey @juliantwo I know you posted this for reassurance that you weren't screwing your kids up, but to me it reads like you showing off about how great a parent you are.

Mine doesn't sleep, does f**k all exercise other than constantly stimming because the only thing she can cope with is swimming and we still don't have that as an option near us. (Well I think one pool might just about be opening, but as I have a stinking cold we'll have to wait until I'm better.) She's on a screen - or even two! - pretty much the whole time she's awake. Minecraft is a win, as far as I'm concerned. She does that, plays Roblox, plays Star Stable Online and watches endless crappy TikToks and YouTube videos. Never picks up a book, totally phobic of reading (although an excellent reader nevertheless - at least she was before lockdown. Now she's probably bordering on illiterate, except that her typing speed has tripled and she has to keep reading to trade on Adopt Me and play Star Stable quests).

Trust me, you are winning at parenting! It's all I can do to keep her alive and reasonably well and happy, keep up with my work (which just isn't calming down even though this is supposed to be my 'quiet' time of year) and occasionally remember to feed the cats or load the dishwasher.

I've worked at home throughout, so she's had no schooling whatsoever (hers wasn't a year group that was invited in at all, even towards the end of term) and even if there was a holiday club we could use she would have a massive anxiety attack and I'd never actually get her through the door.

These are very strange times and in many ways I'm coping less and less well as time has gone on. Am hoping that a return to school in September (a) actually happens and (b) does her good rather than causing her to return to her previous crippling school-based anxiety!

I'm really not intending to show off and I'm sorry it came across that way. I have found the whole thing really challenging.

I'm a teacher like I said and I hope to god both me and the dcs can go back and stay back in sept

No OP
I don’t think many would think you were “showing off”!

My children are younger but I find going to a large play area, beach or woodland area to take up quite a good chunk of the day. I vary the picnic food a bit so they look forward to it, take bikes and promise an ice-cream if there’s lots of effort with walking/cycling. I then don’t mind them having TV when I get in as they’ve been out so long.

@Waytoomuch82 that was in response to a PP who said it sounded as if I was showing off. obviously my standards are much lower than yours!

I completely get the setting reading time thing. My 7 year old is told to do his 30 minutes reading before screen time is allowed. I understand it’s not ideal but he would never choose to read himself freely nor would he do it for half an hour. I get it should be something he enjoys and chooses but it just isn’t!

Same with going out for exercise. They love it once they are out but they need encouraging! Especially at this stage when they’ve been home for nearly 6 months and playing outside has lost its appeal.

Mine have lunch whilst watching tv on the sofa but breakfast and tea are eaten at the table.

It’s really hard but sounds like you’re doing fine. All children are different so if this is working and you are all settled then it’s fine.