Why is Mummy/Daddy considered posh? + Other cultural differences

[NwaNaija]

I'll break this down into 2 posts so the OP isn't too long.

1. Personally, I've noticed many times on here that people see the use of 'Mummy/Daddy' as posh. It's made me laugh because growing up, Mummy/Daddy is the general way of addressing parents in Nigeria (where I was born and raised), regardless of economic status. The pronounciation can be different though (MU-mee, mu-MEE, Mummy).

It isn't really used when speaking about your parents unless you're a child. In that case, 'mother/father' would be used.

Other terms used are Mama/Papa or Baba and other different ones from the many ethnic groups we have. Saying 'Mum/Dad' sounds quite formal and a bit strange, although it's become a bit more common (see next post) nowadays.

I'm not sure how saying mummy/daddy started though, perhaps we got it from the 'posh' colonisers? 🤷🏽‍♀️

Why is it considered posh in the UK?

Question: What are some of the words, phrases or terms used in your country/culture that you've seen used differently in other cultures?

Do you mean children calling their parents “mummy/daddy” is posh?
If so, I had no idea it was posh. I thought it was just normal. Then around the teenage years they tend to change to mum/dad.

Following my OP...

1. Speaking of common, I've also noticed some people here say it in a derogatory/condescending way and it's synonymous with 'tacky', 'in poor taste' or so but when a Nigerian says 'common' (as I just did in my first post), it's used as per the definition (widespread, popular, frequent, usual or the norm) and not as a put down. Although it can be used negatively depending on context and the speaker.

1. What we use similarly to the way people here use common is local. If a Nigerian (in Nigeria) says "local shop", "local boy/girl", "local product", "it's too local", then it's usually a put down and a way to say someone/thing isn't refined, educated, exposed to other pov/culture besides one's own (also see 'village boy/man or girl/woman'), civilised, cheaply-made, bad quality. Someone who lives here would obviously learn to use it differently but can still use it as an insult if they want (especially in the company of other Nigerians).

1. Another one is Proper - Some see the use of it as posh here (although I don't have as many instances of this) but we don't and it's used regularly.

Eg:
Sit down and eat properly or in a proper way (indicating good manners).
I've just had a proper meal (indicating of substance or better quality, more nutritious/filling).
Give them a proper welcome (indicating genuine, good, real).

Would you use it this way or differently?

@FishOnPillows Yes, that's what I noticed but both children and grown ups call their parents 'mummy/daddy' in Nigeria. 'Mother/father', if talking to someone else about their parents.

I never thought it posh myself but have read it here many times.

@FishOnPillows

Not children, but adults who still call their parents mummy/daddy is considered posh in the UK.

‘Mummy’ and ‘Daddy’ is only posh in the U.K. if used after about the age of 12.

[quote formerbabe]@FishOnPillows

Not children, but adults who still call their parents mummy/daddy is considered posh in the UK.[/quote]
DH calls his Mum Mummy and it's not posh, it's weird. He attempted to call me Mummy once and his bollocks fell off in fright when he saw the face I made.

In all seriousness, it probably is a little posh. He's old money so they're very different to ruffians like me.

We also call people who are much older (parents or grandparents' age) mummy/daddy, mama/papa, etc. You can't call older people by their names. It's either uncle/aunty (or Uncle Name, Aunty Name), mummy/daddy, etc.

You don't hear Ma and Pa used much now - if at all.

Adults calling their parents Mummy/Daddy does sound posh to me and I find it very weird. MIL talks about FIL to her children and says Daddy. Hate it! DH calls them both Mum and Dad.

In terms of common/proper, I think that’s just how language evolves in different areas. Everyone will have a different way of saying it depending on where they’re from.

You don't hear Ma and Pa used much now - if at all.

I use it - I grew up saying mummy and daddy then as my mother disliked the word 'mum' I instead graduated to the word 'ma'. I'm in my early 40's so it's not like I'm ancient.

Prince Charles calls HM Mummy - he did it in a speech once, for her birthday or a jubilee or something. That was a bit weird

YABU posting this in AIBU when you don't have an U question. It would have been better in Chat. But the topic is interesting so in that respect YANBU to post it.

I am English-speaking myself (Irish descent) but was born and live in Scandinavia. I was in my 30s when I realised there was some sort of difference in Mum/Mummy, Dad/Daddy, as in the latter is considered childish and you "grow out of it". The wake up was watching Buffy when she finds her mother on the sofa and says "Mom? Mom?" and then with trembling lip "Mommy?" I'm still very uncertain about how to use this.

I use proper the same way as you OP. Not local (it's just local).

Irish people famously use "bold" to mean badly-behaved or possibly rascally, rogueish about an adult.

@Enb76

You don't hear Ma and Pa used much now - if at all.

I use it - I grew up saying mummy and daddy then as my mother disliked the word 'mum' I instead graduated to the word 'ma'. I'm in my early 40's so it's not like I'm ancient.

Oh my mother did this - she was a terrible snob (& we lived in a council house until I was 14!)

She refused to be called Mum, I refused to call her Mummy or Mother, so I didn't call her anything

I never thought of Ma, but pretty sure that would have been too common.

(My dad was fine with Dad)

time.com/5249561/prince-charles-call-queen-mummy/

@TwentyViginti

You don't hear Ma and Pa used much now - if at all.

Ma and Pa is how some would answer their parents if called (as in 'Maaa' or 'Paaa', similar to the way Italians pronounce it). Funnily enough, answering that way is considered 'local'/low class.

YABU posting this in AIBU when you don't have an U question. It would have been better in Chat. But the topic is interesting so in that respect YANBU to post it. grin

@banivani Lol. Ok I forgot. AIBU to think mummy/daddy isn't posh? Or AIBU to ask why it's considered posh?

My dd calls dh Pa or Papa but I fear this is because of too many episodes of costume drama. I am mummy or mum or v occasionally mama.

I called my df Daddy most of the time, DBro called him Pop. DM is mum/mummy interchangeably. Not posh.

We're British, not living in UK.

Our early/mid 20s "kids" still call us Mummy & Daddy.

I guess it's not having peers who have changed from Mummy/Daddy to Mum & Dad.

We call our own parents Mum & Dad & refer to each other as Mum & Dad-as in "go & ask your Mum/Does Dad know?

Also sign cards to them from "Mum & Dad".

But it seems that the habit won't be broken!

My teen DS' still call me Mummy. We are very much not posh.

The poshest person I know calls his parents by their names. But then he's not actual gentry posh or anything like that.

Mama and Papa are the poshest forms of address.

My children called us Mama and Papa (mamma and pappa, DH is from France) until about 4, then on starting school, I became Mummy, but DH stayed as Papa
They still just about call me Mummy, but are becoming more sheepish about it on occasion (they are 14 and 11!) and it seems to be morphing into Mutti we live in England, btw!
None of us like "Mum", it's just such a "urgh" sound I think.

I'm 45 and still call my parents mummy and daddy. I'm not posh though . But my mother is Irish and called her parents mammy and daddy until they died, so maybe that's why its 'normal' for me?

Where I'm from it's definitely seen as posh to call your parents mummy and daddy as adults. I think it's because there was a fairly obvious wealth divide and for some reason it was more common in the posher and richer to use mummy and daddy even after teen years.

It does strike me as a little silly, but that's just because I would feel silly doing it. I realise different people see it differently though.

Um, sorry about the x-post with Pelleas! We aren't "posh" at all.

I find it weird to hear adult children calling other adults Mummy and Daddy. The absolute worst is husband and wife calling each other Mummy and Daddy.

An old school friend of mine grew up calling her parents Mom and Dad. Sometime in her late twenties until her forties. she started using the name Pa which sounds very affected to my ears.