To feel sad looking at ex's WhatsApp status and his GF. I can't help it!!

[whatsappcurse]

I’ve written about my ex on here, I left him he didn’t leave me. I just couldn’t deal with his laziness, and there was just a lot that was going on in our marriage. There was no abuse or cheating, just fucking laziness from his part. It wasn’t a bad ‘bad’ marriage as such.

He’s moved on, and he’s the sort of person who likes to take pictures of what he eats or been. He does it whether he’s with his mum, friends or girlfriend. So I know he’s not doing it to ‘show her off’.

But it just hurts like hell to see him post pictures on his WhatsApp status of them being out and about, to nice fancy restaurants. They’ve been eating out since Monday because of the 50% off discount thing, yesterday he took her to this really nice high end steak house in London he’s always talked about going when we were together, but just never went. I could see it was that restaurant because of the menu card on the table. It was so hard seeing her there with her nicely done nails eating steak with him. I’m also jealous that we just never went out like that, but he’s always going out with her.

I can’t block him because we have children together, I’ve tried to mute his WhatsApp status so I don’t see his pictures. But I can still see it, it’s just not at the top with all the other WhatsApp statuses. I find myself constantly looking at his status, I can’t help it. I wish I could just block him. We have an OK relationship apart from this.

I’m just sad that her and her daughter are living the life my children and I should be living. I know I left him, but had it not been for his laziness we would still have been together 😔

[MrsSSG]

Tell him you're having some problems with your WhatsApp and can you text instead?

Then block and don't look at his stories again. People post all these happy pics but it's only half the story sometimes. Ignore.

He's probably only taking her out as it's cheap atm and he's too lazy to cook, it won't last!

[PicsInRed]

@Honeybobbin

No-one updates WhatsApp like that! He's deliberately winding you up!

This, exactly. He's pathetic. Ignore him.

[BarbedBloom]

The thing is, he may slip back but sometimes breaking up with someone gives them a kick in the bum to change. I split with an ex for something similar and he realised what an impact his laziness and lack of motivation had on me.

He was a fantastic boyfriend to his next girlfriend and got a new job, organised for them to travel. They are still very happy together. But the truth is, without me breaking up with him he never would have changed. He needed that shock to understand that people weren't going to accept him as he was.

However some people don't change, they may just get with someone who isn't as bothered about the same thing you were, or who cuts off the behavior at the start

[TwentyViginti]

I would really like to know how you can keep a contact on your phone but not have them in WhatsApp

I archive contacts I don't want to see in contacts. They'll only pop up then if they message you.

Some posters are confused between the profile avatar and status. OP means status - which I didn't know was a thing til this thread!

[BarbedBloom]

I would disagree about the whatsapp status actually. Quite a few people on my list treat it like FB. The key thing is whether he has always updated it frequently

[2bazookas]

You and ex need to share a separate whatsapp which is just for communication about the kids.

[GrootFroot]

@2bazookas

You and ex need to share a separate whatsapp which is just for communication about the kids.

You can only have one WhatsApp per number can't you?

The easiest option here is just to block him and use regular text messages or email instead.

[JaffaCakeGal]

agree with PP he can see you're looking and he's trying to wind you up.

Out of interest I just looked at my whatsapps and not a single one of my friends is using the status thing as there's nothing there, didn't even know this was a thing! Block him and tell him he can text you instead.

[Iwonder08]

I wonder why lots of people think he is doing it to wind his ex wife up? Can't he just be happy and enjoying his life?
OP, you dumped him. I am sure you had good reasons to do so. You want to go to a fancy steakhouse just go to a steakhouse!maybe find some one better this time around. Maybe take yourself out of looking at his pictures all the time

[fwwaftp]

I archive contacts I don't want to see in contacts. They'll only pop up then if they message you.

How do you do this please? I've had a look but can't work it out

[ViciousJackdaw]

It was so hard seeing her there with her nicely done nails

Do your own then. And if they are not in good condition then start looking after them.

I’m just sad that her and her daughter are living the life my children and I should be living

Nothing to stop you from going to the steakhouse though is there? In fact, now is the perfect time with the discount.

[TwentyViginti]

@fwwaftp

I archive contacts I don't want to see in contacts. They'll only pop up then if they message you.

How do you do this please? I've had a look but can't work it out

Press on the name of the contact. I tick will appear at the side of the contact's name. At the top of WhatsApp an arrow will appear. Tap the arrow. Gone!

[TwentyViginti]

Sorry, tick appears on the contact's avatar.

[UnaCorda]

Yes, it's hard when you see someone doing something with someone else that they wouldn't do with you, and easy to read into it.

But there may be other reasons. I got very jealous once when I discovered an ex had taken another woman to the opera when he would never go to a concert with me. I then realised that it was quite possible he felt insecure about going with me because I know a lot more about classical music than him - it wasn't necessarily a reflection of how much he liked me (athough it could have been!).

Perhaps his new partner did all the hard work - made the booking, etc.

[Zaphodsotherhead]

I love the way a lot of people are assuming that your ex has done a 180 and suddenly become the kind of person to eat out. Maybe his new GF is very proactive and is dragging him around to places so she can post on HER WhatsApp?

It will wear off. By the autumn they'll be staying in every day with Neflix and packets of Doritos. Honestly.

[fwwaftp]

I love the way a lot of people are assuming that your ex has done a 180 and suddenly become the kind of person to eat out. Maybe his new GF is very proactive and is dragging him around to places so she can post on HER WhatsApp?

This could definitely be the case. I think that's what's happening with my ex and new gf. He was too lazy/not capable of booking anything - now he's all over the place with her so the most likely scenario is that she is doing it all and he's tagging along just like he did with me.

[Bluntness100]

Op, I don’t get it, you didn’t do these things with him and you’re not doing them now you’re not with him. Why not? There is nothing to stop you booking occasional treats.

[dangerrabbit]

Don't block him, just delete his number. You then won't be able to see his WhatsApp status but can still receive messages from him etc so it doesn't look like you've blocked him

[whatsappcurse]

Don't block him, just delete his number. You then won't be able to see his WhatsApp status but can still receive messages from him etc so it doesn't look like you've blocked him

Omg thank you so much!!! I've just deleted his number, the messages are still there but his WhatsApp status about last nights steak house is GONE! puff! I want to give you a hug

I can finally breathe, don't have to see his stupid WhatsApp stories, where he's been with or or take her.

[dangerrabbit]

Good news whatsappcurse! And he won't be able to work it out either, like he might if you blocked him.

[MumsyMumIAmNot]

WhatsApp daily updates? No one does that. YABU get over it.

[TinaTurnoff]

@TimelyManor

I need to stop. I just need to have better self discipline.
It took me a lot of willpower to begin with but once your mood starts lifting it becomes easier. You can do this

This.

You just have to make a decision to cut those updates out, whatever way you do that. I say this as someone who used to monitor ex’s social media, driving myself wild with anger and frustration. It’s a poisonous fuel, and the only person who suffers is you. Block block block on everything except text or email. The less you feed it, the less it will negatively impact on you. Now, if my friends mention ‘oh, I see ex is ...’, I say ‘now, we’ve spoken about this - you are not helping me. I don’t want to know this.’ Don’t permit space in your head to be occupied this way.

[whatsappcurse]

@dangerrabbit I feel relieved, he doesn't have any other social media accounts, so there's nothing else I could look on. Just snapchat but he doesn't post anything there, he uses WhatsApp status for that for some reason . I'm curious, have you deleted someone's number to avoid seeing their WhatsApp updates? how on earth did you figure that out? I wish I knew how to do that, could have saved myself from so much heartache and stress. I tell myself no you're not going to look, but I can't help it. And it makes it worse knowing he can see I've viewed his stories

[babydisney]

Basically you werent the one enough for him to put in the effort, you've made him better for her. It doesn't mean that he wod act better with you he was comfy with you if even slightly bored, it's sad yes but it's the truth. Delete WhatsApp say just text like above ect, get out there meet someone more suited. If you go back to him you'll either be fighting her or thinking about her and it's too late now move on.

[66redballons]

Of course you can block him. Tell him to text or phone instead,