Page 2 | runaway fund and new notes

gurneyhalleck · 2020-08-02T19:18:37+00:00

I am wondering how to convert my runaway fund from old twenties to new twenties discreetly in this time of Corona. I have been skimming my daily spends for years, saving 20-30 pounds a week from my daily lunch/coffee work money. This I have been keeping as physical cash tucked away and it's a sizable sum. After years, I feel restless in my marriage. I am considering cutting the cord once the children hit adulthood in a couple of years. Much of my stash is in old twenties. How can I get these converted in one go without having to leave details, or cldo I have to do it piecemeal? My problem there is I am currently not in the office, so normally where I could have stopped by on my way in to do it, I don't have that regularity at the moment. Any ideas? Obviously I would like to keep it out of any accounts or anything that leaves an electronic trail

christmassooncantwait · 02/08/2020 21:29

How about opening a savings account to add onto your usual account so extra letters will look like they are just for your normal account ?

Lovelydovey · 02/08/2020 21:31

Exchange in person at the Bank of England when the old notes are withdrawn. While they will require your details and check these, there is no public record or paperwork you have to keep.

LesLavandes · 02/08/2020 21:50

If you bank your stash. You will by law have to declare it upon divorce

Lockheart · 02/08/2020 21:52

Assuming that your husband is not financially abusive, or abusive in any way for that matter, I think you're out of order here.

I'd be furious if I found my husband was hiding family money away in case he ever felt like leaving me because he got restless.

If you've been hiding £20-£30 for years then that's several thousand pounds of family money you've hoarded.

It's really not on.

MorganKitten · 02/08/2020 21:55

Open a monzo account, put the money you saved in your bank and transfer to monzo. Simple.

macaroniandpizza · 02/08/2020 22:15

Still plenty time to use paper £20 notes there has been no date for withdrawing them yet

Snozle · 02/08/2020 22:27

She has been skimming from her own money. If her DP had the same amount I don't see a problem with her saving part of hers.

Lockheart · 02/08/2020 22:31

@Snozle that will not stand up in a divorce court when it comes down to splitting assets. And if she is trying to hide assets (hence the lack of paper trails) then that will not go down well.

In marriage, assets are joint. One partner should not be hiding money from another, unless there is some sort of abuse going on which necessitates it.

Snozle · 02/08/2020 22:38

Obviously, but some PP are making out like it was family money at the time. It wasn't.

... just another reason never to get married. I walked away with my very needed 'running away' fund.

Lockheart · 02/08/2020 22:44

@Snozle but it is family money. Assets are joint when you're married.

It's neither healthy nor moral to hide money from your spouse, with whom your assets are joint, unless you are being abused and need an out.

Especially not when she's trying to avoid a paper trail, presumably so she doesn't have to declare the assets in the divorce, or because she knows it's not a good thing to do and her husband would (not unjustifiably in my view) go spare.

If the OP is being abused then obviously this doesn't apply. But all she says in her OP is that she's getting restless. That's a pretty shitty reason to hide family money.

Imagine if a poster on here found her husband had become restless and buggered off with several thousand he'd saved over the years which the OP knew nothing about? It's not good.

Sunrise234 · 02/08/2020 22:51

Why don’t you just leave now?
Then you won’t need to worry about sneaking around to change your money. You say in a couple of years your children will be in adulthood so this is a good time to leave.

Sunrise234 · 02/08/2020 22:56

I’ve never heard of a runaway fund (unless the person is in an abusivr relationship) but surely just by thinking about having one means your not in the right relationship.

Also if the op has been saving £20-30 Per week for several years that’s thousands worth of £20 notes im not sure what bank will exchange them without it looking like it’s stolen money.

Original poster

gurneyhalleck · 03/08/2020 10:21

Some good advice here, along with the expected vitriol. Let's break it down:

MN says you can leave a marriage for any reason

MN says marriage can damage young children (I'm sure that counts for adult DC as well but not too the same extent)

MN says 'get your ducks in a row'. Surely that includes having enough money to be able to put down a rental deposit, purchase a car and basic furnishings? Let's not kid ourselves, even if I had 5k, that would do a deposit, a cheap banger car, real basic furnishings and white goods and leave maybe 1000?

How many threads have been on here talking about financial independence and having your own money and that resilience?

We have a joint account, we both have our own separate accounts. The money, which is the vast majority of our earnings, goes into the joint account with the little left each of us taking an amount into our separate accounts. I don't judge what my partner does with his money so no I wouldn't be 'fuming'.

As to fraud - the cash withdrawals are accounted for in everyday spending, drawn in small amounts of under 20 at a time in the same locations close to work. Tell me how a forensic accountant would be able to track this physical asset that has been built from a pattern of reasonable everyday spending?

OP posts:

LonelyFromCorona · 03/08/2020 10:41

You haven't indicated if your partner is abusive and this is truly to escape or just in case you're bored/fed up or 'restless' as you've put it.

If this was a man stashing away a few thousand so he could leave his wife, people would be outraged. If you both work and have fairly even financial contributions then that money belongs to both of you really.

If you have separate individual bank accounts as well as a joint account, why not let money build up in there? Why would he ever challenge that? Again you have not indicated any suggestion of financial abuse.

Very strange

contrmary · 03/08/2020 10:41

It's fraud because it's fraud. You can't argue it isn't fraud just because you don't think a clever accountant will find it.

Bitchinkitchen · 03/08/2020 10:43

@gurneyhalleck

Some good advice here, along with the expected vitriol. Let's break it down:

MN says you can leave a marriage for any reason

MN says marriage can damage young children (I'm sure that counts for adult DC as well but not too the same extent)

MN says 'get your ducks in a row'. Surely that includes having enough money to be able to put down a rental deposit, purchase a car and basic furnishings? Let's not kid ourselves, even if I had 5k, that would do a deposit, a cheap banger car, real basic furnishings and white goods and leave maybe 1000?

How many threads have been on here talking about financial independence and having your own money and that resilience?

We have a joint account, we both have our own separate accounts. The money, which is the vast majority of our earnings, goes into the joint account with the little left each of us taking an amount into our separate accounts. I don't judge what my partner does with his money so no I wouldn't be 'fuming'.

As to fraud - the cash withdrawals are accounted for in everyday spending, drawn in small amounts of under 20 at a time in the same locations close to work. Tell me how a forensic accountant would be able to track this physical asset that has been built from a pattern of reasonable everyday spending?

So you're taking your "running away money" from the joint account? That's not OK.

Surely the fact that you've thought about the fact that a forensic accountant couldnt find it alerts you to the fact that it's a dick move? If your husband isn't abusive, i don't think there's any reason to take money that also belongs to him.

Yankathebear · 03/08/2020 10:56

Tough audience op! Maybe people should have to start adding a disclaimer, abusive relationship/non abusive.

Do people think op would be squirrelling money if everything was okay?

@gurneyhalleck I wish I had done it. I left with nothing.

SteelyPanther · 03/08/2020 11:13

Don’t open an account and put it in as he would be entitled to half.
Any bank should change it for you.

SteelyPanther · 03/08/2020 11:16

@diggadoo

You need to open a separate bank account and put all your money in it. That way if there was a burglary, fire or flood, you wouldn't lose all your cash

If there is money in an account she will have to declare it. Cash is best. A solicitor told me that they go back 12 months in divorce. So if you’re planning to leave you need to take cash out in small amounts so it doesn’t look fishy.

CherryRipe1 · 03/08/2020 11:19

Pay into cash point smallish amounts & draw out same amount. Or buy gold sovereigns.

AlwaysCheddar · 03/08/2020 11:20

Banks an post office will exchange them. Had to do it this week. No questions.

Snozle · 03/08/2020 11:30

I'm still with you OP. If you both get a certain amount of money to spend a week and you save yours and he spends his... then the money you have saved should be yours ! I get that it might legally 'family' money.. but you are right about double standards on MN.

Could you get a pre paid credit card ? Gift cards? Spend it on something expensive (like wine) then stash it ?

Sunrise234 · 03/08/2020 11:34

@Yankathebear I understand that but she has thousands stashed away so why not leave now instead of waiting a couple more years.

MN says marriage can damage young children (I'm sure that counts for adult DC as well but not too the same extent)

This is true but your choosing to stay for a couple more years so how is that not damaging them further?

Lockheart · 03/08/2020 11:45

@gurneyhalleck

Some good advice here, along with the expected vitriol. Let's break it down:

MN says you can leave a marriage for any reason

MN says marriage can damage young children (I'm sure that counts for adult DC as well but not too the same extent)

MN says 'get your ducks in a row'. Surely that includes having enough money to be able to put down a rental deposit, purchase a car and basic furnishings? Let's not kid ourselves, even if I had 5k, that would do a deposit, a cheap banger car, real basic furnishings and white goods and leave maybe 1000?

How many threads have been on here talking about financial independence and having your own money and that resilience?

We have a joint account, we both have our own separate accounts. The money, which is the vast majority of our earnings, goes into the joint account with the little left each of us taking an amount into our separate accounts. I don't judge what my partner does with his money so no I wouldn't be 'fuming'.

As to fraud - the cash withdrawals are accounted for in everyday spending, drawn in small amounts of under 20 at a time in the same locations close to work. Tell me how a forensic accountant would be able to track this physical asset that has been built from a pattern of reasonable everyday spending?

MN says you can leave a marriage for any reason

Of course you can. Has anyone said you can't?

MN says marriage can damage young children (I'm sure that counts for adult DC as well but not too the same extent)

It can, but you've given no indication that is the problem here, and you're also planning to stay a few more years so I doubt that's your primary concern here.

*MN says 'get your ducks in a row'. Surely that includes having enough money to be able to put down a rental deposit, purchase a car and basic furnishings? Let's not kid ourselves, even if I had 5k, that would do a deposit, a cheap banger car, real basic furnishings and white goods and leave maybe 1000?

How many threads have been on here talking about financial independence and having your own money and that resilience?*

Financial independence and having your own money does not mean hiding family money. And when you are married, all money is family money. Yes, have non-joint accounts so that both of you have access to money which the other does not, you need that independence, but hiding thousands of pounds away from your husband and children is a dick move.

Tell me how a forensic accountant would be able to track this physical asset that has been built from a pattern of reasonable everyday spending?

They might not but given you've just posted that you're hiding marital assets on a public forum, they might not have to...

hadtojoin · 03/08/2020 11:49

You could swap the notes for travellers cheques. They are valid indefinately and as long as you keep the receipt with the reference numbers on somewhere safe and seperately you can claim the money back from the issuing bank if they are lost, destroyed or stolen. That could also give you a valid reason for having a large amount of cash ie: saving up for a holiday. You can also use them in this country as well as abroad if neded.