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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Summer is just no fun with a baby, AIBU?

75 replies

Lelophants · 31/07/2020 19:28

Maybe it's the added stressed of coronavirus or I'm just being grumpy. Or maybe summer just really isnt than fun with an 8 month old? When does it get good?

All these light days and yet I'm stuck upstairs in the dark for every naptime because he contact naps and that's the only place he'll sleep.

Too hot to go out any time other than first thing in the morning and if you miss it, you're stuck inside all day. Far too hot outside! Having to keep all the windows and curtains closed in the house to keep it cool and especially for night time. So bit dark and depressing. All the overheating anxiety.

Had all these visions of us being outside in the paddling pool, but so hard to get shade in our garden and terrified of him burning! Filling up the pool is a nightmare as have to get it over 30 degrees and then only in for a few minutes, then you lose that tiny bit of shade! And where to put them where you're filling it up?

Honestly find it all stressful and a disappointment! Give me cold brisk walks in a snow suit any day.

Yes I'm a grump. I hate seeing a beautiful day we can't enjoy.

Does it get better?

OP posts:
Icecreamsoda99 · 31/07/2020 20:05

I'm with you OP, but I think today is especially bad as it's sweltering where I am. I have a 7 month old and had visions of summers spent having fun in the sun but I'm not good in the heat at the best of times. Roll on Autumn!

ChloeCC · 31/07/2020 20:09

I have a very mobile 8-month old. She eats a lot of grass. I can' really relax because she's always looking for the next danger. It's exhausting.

HowLongCanICallitBabyWeight · 31/07/2020 20:13

DS was that age last summer, paddling pool top it up with some warm water and bubble bath, parasol, DS loves one of those fish bubble blowing machines. Swings at the park or in the garden, we live closer to the beach too so we'd walk down there. Just keep applying the factor fifty and get him a property UV swimsuit and hat with neck cover. More likely to over great indoors with all the curtains drawn than it in the fresh air? Today was exceptionally hot but it's not been a particularly hot summer so far, last year we had a heat wave! You can also go somewhere in the morning then drive somewhere else for the afternoon if you have Aircon in the car, spend the hottest hour or so driving.

adreamofspring · 31/07/2020 20:14

Get a cheap beach shelter if you can afford it. Stick it up in the garden and you can enjoy all the water and messy play you want. Don’t worry about a full paddling pool, just some cups and a washing up bowl.

Or just have a picnic with all the new weaning foods they’re trying.
It’s better than worrying about the mess they make when they throw the food all over the kitchen floor.

dottiedodah · 31/07/2020 20:15

Maybe a big parasol or a gazebo? Go out early say 7/8 until about 9/10 lots of suncream . little paddling pool (you can put your feet in too!) hat and Tshirt for him .After 3 or 4 pm maybe another hour or so ? Know what you mean about Summer though!

PotteringAlong · 31/07/2020 20:17

Filling up the pool is a nightmare as have to get it over 30 degrees and then only in for a few minutes, then you lose that tiny bit of shade! And where to put them where you're filling it up?

Since when does your paddling pool need to be over 30 degrees?! And they’re 8 months old. They can’t move - just bung them on the floor, or in a bouncy chair.

I think you’re making this harder than it needs to be.

ThursdayLastWeek · 31/07/2020 20:20

It does get better. I had spring babies and can totally relate to that feeling of wasting nice days when you can’t be arsed to go out with all the gear for a baby in the heat.

As mine got older I finally succumbed to taking an umbrella to the beach, and making the most of cooler mornings and evenings.

It feels endless now but it does pass honest!

Wolfgirrl · 31/07/2020 20:20

I agree OP. Flies, sticky sun cream everywhere, too hot for baby to sleep, too sweaty to wear the sling, getting hot and bothered pushing the pram up the massive hills where we live, and to top it off no baby groups because of COVID.

Bring on autumn!

PotteringAlong · 31/07/2020 20:22

too sweaty to wear the sling

@Wolfgirrl get yourself a second hand solarweave connecta - it will change your summer sling wearing life!

Sailingblue · 31/07/2020 20:29

I think you will find it easier next year. Last year my 2nd was 5m at this point and I found it quite tricky to balance the needs of the baby and my older one. This year she’s able to have fun in the paddling pool, play with the water table etc. It’s not relaxing though as she needs constant supervision. I’m hoping next year will be a game changer when they can play with each other and I can sit on a lounger.

Original poster
Lelophants · 31/07/2020 20:34

@PotteringAlong it's recommended at least 30 degrees if only in a swim nappy. I tried at 26 because I couldn't get the thing heated properly and he started shivering. Felt like terrible mum!

OP posts:
Dontforgetyourbrolly · 31/07/2020 20:36

Just get one of those really small paddling pools that would be easy to fill with warm water and stay warm.
I agree , naps in the buggy in the shade . Maybe go for a long walk op ( not in 30c heat like today ! ) , take a book and find a shady spot while baby naps have a coffee or something.
I totally understand how you feel , I'll swap you my 6 year old hahah he has totally destroyed me this week , shattered

Hercwasonaroll · 31/07/2020 20:39

You're over thinking a LOT here OP.

3yo and 7mo here. 7mo has to roll with whatever we're doing with his brother. It's not been that warm this summer bar today. You don't need a pool, get a washing up bowl at that age.

Toys on a blanket on the lawn. Gazebo, parasol or sling up a sheet to make shade.

Stop the contact naps and sleep train. That will free up your time.

Bitchinkitchen · 31/07/2020 20:39

@PotteringAlong

Filling up the pool is a nightmare as have to get it over 30 degrees and then only in for a few minutes, then you lose that tiny bit of shade! And where to put them where you're filling it up?

Since when does your paddling pool need to be over 30 degrees?! And they’re 8 months old. They can’t move - just bung them on the floor, or in a bouncy chair.

I think you’re making this harder than it needs to be.

Lol at you with your immobile 8-month old. DD has been crawling and pulling herself up on stuff since 7, zero peace! And it's not exactly unusual either.
flissity · 31/07/2020 20:50

Paddling pool for 7 month old really doesn’t need to be deep to cool them off! Literally a tiny paddling pool with maybe 2 inches of water for him to splash his hands/feet in. Put some plastic pots etc in. Or some bubbles? Stick parasol over the top.

I don’t find it that hard. I’ve got a 11year old, 8yrs and a 7 week baby. We’ve been to beach today, go out for walks, me and baby lay under trees while big girls on playground etc. And sometimes we just stay in and watch a film. Yes it can be hard in the holidays when DH is at work 5 days a week and I’m the only adult 8-6pm.

I think you have to just do stuff and not have high expectations or plan too much. I find if I ‘over plan’ that’s when things are slightly stressful.

Curiosity101 · 31/07/2020 20:58

Totally agree with plastic storage tubs or washing up bowls to splash around with. Today we had an underbed storage tub with a couple of inches of water and a load of his toys in it on a big blanket on the garden. Mostly he just splashed for awhile. Also a garden parasol or similar for shade.

We also bought a portable air con unit which makes playing inside much more bearable too.

The only other thing we have that is a life saver is his bouncer. If I ever need to nip to the loo etc then he'll either be temporarily upstairs in his cot or downstairs in his bouncer. Alternatively a play pen/travel cot is very useful. You can't always have eyes on them so having a safe place they can go is important.

The only other thing I'd suggest is have you considered sleep training? If you haven't tried it then I'd definitely invest some time researching different methods and see if anything jumps out to you as suitable. I think you could really save yourself a lot of time if you can make those naps less involved.

Bellesavage · 31/07/2020 21:03

Yes it's shit. I have a 10 mo and a 5yo. I know from the older one it gets a lot better, the yougest is a nightmare climber and puts anything in his mouth so I cannot sit down for more than about 3 seconds in the garden. Also terrified of them burning so we save paddling pool for after 4pm, with UV suits on and hats etc. I'm very relaxed with naps though, I just roll with it and deal with 10 mins of screaming if he flakes out too late in the day. Id recommend a summer pram cover though.

whatswithtodaytoday · 31/07/2020 21:06

If he's not close to crawling, you need a Galt play nest. Keeps them upright so they can see what's going on - mine absolutely loved it at 8 months, I was so sad when he got strong enough to crawl out!

weirdexperience · 31/07/2020 21:08

Ideas

Buy a long sleeve swim shirt with legs and UVF protection to aid with the burn worries
Pool can be cool, I bet he won't care
Get a fan for the pram/pushchair
Go to a park with shady trees and sit under them

But yes, it's shit.

BeamerTown · 31/07/2020 21:10

I have an 8 month old... we have a tiny paddling pool which she absolutely loves for splashing in. We fill it up with warm water from the tap using a watering can, it’s that small. Could you try that? We did have to spend more time inside today because of the heat.

I’ve found that the more I push the baby into doing new things, the more I find she’s flexible and can do. She’s always surprising me and she needs to be doing new things to develop - even a trot around the park.

I do totally understand what you’re saying though - it’s restrictive and my goodness, can be relentless and super boring!

But really, the issue isn’t the sunshine - it’s the sleep! You should be able to take his naps as your time, to chill or to sort the house or to whatever will make you feel sane. Please consider sleep training, it gives me 45 mins in the morning to get my life sorted, 2 hours over lunch to get everyone else’s life sorted, and my evening free.

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 31/07/2020 21:10

Defo buy a mini gazebo / tent - we use ours still with our 3 year old so she can do painting/ art in the garden on hot days whilst keeping call- also used for bbqs to shade the table of food

Bellesavage · 31/07/2020 21:15

Can I just say that if you're not comfortable with sleep training then that's ok. Sometimes it feels like there's a lot of pressure to sleep train but it's never been something I've been comfortable with for my two. What you could do is introduce a bit of light and noise slowly to the room so that baby is used to more going on. That way you could catch up on box sets during nap time.

vixb1 · 31/07/2020 21:32

I have a 9 month old ginger baby! We're luckily on holiday at the moment. I've spent a week trying to keep her hat on and stop her shoving handfuls of sand in her mouth. I just don't understand why after the first mouthful she doesn't think it's a bad idea?!

BeamerTown · 31/07/2020 21:51

@Bellesavage I think that people have some idea that sleep training = controlled crying. All sleep training was for us was making sure that the environment was right to sleep (blackout, white noise) and that she had an appropriate nap schedule which we stuck to rigorously. She never cried more than a minute.

forevercurious · 31/07/2020 22:11

I have a 7.5 month old baby and he just cannot cope in the heat at all. Doesn’t nap, has barely eaten and has taken so long to get to sleep this rvenibgw. He’s spent the day in just a nappy in a tray of water in the lounge, alternating between playing happily and being grizzly and wanting to be attached to me at all times which is just not possible in this heat! It doesn’t help that out bedrooms upstairs get SO hot bedtime is just a nightmare.

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