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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No Swimming Pool After 8pm - AIBU?

213 replies

Varala · 31/07/2020 18:28

We had a swimming pool built (outdoor) last spring which has been great fun for DD and DH (I’m not much of a swimmer), especially during lockdown.

We do have a large garden, but it is bordered by three other nearby houses. Two just by the garden, but one of the houses is up against one of the far walls of the garden, by the pool.

Earlier today, a note was found shoved under DH’s windscreen wiper (not sure what’s wrong with the letter box, but hey ho). It is signed “your neighbours” and requests that we not use the pool after 8pm as they are being disturbed by shouting and splashing.

Very rarely is the pool in use that late in the evening anyway, but on the rare occasion it is, there is certainly not any shouting (though a bit of splashing can’t be helped). Are the neighbours just jealous that we have a pool? I’m fuming and ready to go round each of the neighbours individually to discuss, but DH has told me to drop it and they’ll let it go. AIBU to think it’s nobody else’s business what we do with our pool?

OP posts:
Want2beme · 31/07/2020 20:05

When I lived in a complex with an outdoor communal pool, the hours of use were 11am-8pm all year round.

dottiedodah · 31/07/2020 20:06

I think they are being rather mean TBH. Apart from anything else we dont live in California! How many times does anyone manage to be able to go in their pool FFS! Just enjoy it while you can and they can Sod Off!

Pr1mr0se · 31/07/2020 20:06

Bet the YABU unreasonable types on here saying 8pm is perfectly acceptable time are your neighbours! :-)

Hellothere19999 · 31/07/2020 20:07

I don’t think they’re necessarily jealous, but they might have young babies etc ?

peakygal · 31/07/2020 20:07

The amount of pp's agreeing they are right Confused It's the summer, they are children and 8pm is early. It would be different if it was at all hours. Cannot believe people now think they can tell other people how quiet they should make their kids be when they're having fun...The mind boggles. If you never let your DC outside the door they'd be posting on here and being told contact SS or 111 immediately Hmm

Whathewhatnow · 31/07/2020 20:07

And honestly, notwithstanding health issues or disability or emergency services shiftworking, which sad sack hates the noise of people enjoying themselves in their own gardens?

Want2beme · 31/07/2020 20:08

Actually, I've just remembered I had a pool in my garden, (lived in a hot climate), and there were no restrictions re. times of use.

GreytExpectations · 31/07/2020 20:08

@Pr1mr0se

Bet the YABU unreasonable types on here saying 8pm is perfectly acceptable time are your neighbours! :-)
They will be the ones who sit in complete silence and darkness from 7pm. They also force their children not to make a single happy noise, because you know God forbid neighbours hear children being children
2020iscancelled · 31/07/2020 20:09

Personally I would curtail the evenings during the week perhaps but then I’m super respectful of other people’s space.
I would be pissed off if every time I tried to have a quiet drink in the garden come 9pm there were neighbours splashing around next door.
And honestly you probably would be too.

Is it that hard to imagine that hearing the noise it’s a bit annoying?

Some kid from down the road was scraping his scooter on the pavement right outside my house yday - he was only playing but the noise was fucking ridiculous. His mum just stood in her front garden not bothered at all - If it we’re my child I’d have been mortified.

But as I say, I’m super respectful and want my kids to be considerate of others

BatShite · 31/07/2020 20:09

Yeah I would bet on them being jealous tbh. Also, I would be using it til maybe 10pm. If kids are actually screaming then its an issue, but I have found that neighbours whinge regardless, just because of children existing seemingly, even if they are quiet.

(Issues with neighbours whinging about kids..they aren't even whinging about mine, they whinge about next doors apparently screeching at all hours, something I have ever ever heard. Complaining neibghbours make FAR more noise, and at silly times too, than the apparently noisy kids!)

SantaClaritaDiet · 31/07/2020 20:10

If anything, I highly doubt your 4 kids are quiet at all, more kids means more noise. I definitely believe the OP over you if I'm honest.

it's call teaching them manners... and respecting others. It seems to work for all my neighbours too as we all enjoy peaceful early mornings and evenings.

I love that it's normal for a teacher to handle a class of 30 kids without any of them screaming, screeching or shouting but a normal parent shouldn't be able to Grin

SantaClaritaDiet · 31/07/2020 20:11

I can think of a lot of grim conditions that people might have to live in. Family of 6 in a 1 bedroom flat in a tower block, tenant with black mould in the walls. Weirdly “in a house with a garden next door to a swimming pool” doesn’t quite make into the top 10 grim living conditions countdown..

MN would not be MN without our usual race to the bottom and competitive misery post.
I love this site Grin

SantaClaritaDiet · 31/07/2020 20:14

You can easily see who are the nightmare neighbours from these threads, gosh I am grateful I live surrounded by civilised people.

In the real world, no one is happy to hear noisy kids at 5 am or in the evening, unless the ones with loud music or tv covering the racket!

MrsTerryPratchett · 31/07/2020 20:15

Children + pool = shouting

Unless you children are VERY different to the average.

Brefugee · 31/07/2020 20:16

meh - i think 8pm is too early, but if someone built a pool 20 metres from their house but 5 metres from mine it wouldn't be jealousy that I'd be feeling.

Mummadeeze · 31/07/2020 20:17

They are being v unreasonable in my opinion. If I was having a late drink in my garden I would be happy to hear you and your children splashing and having fun next door. 8pm is way too early a curfew to stop you enjoying your garden and pool.

uniglowooljumper · 31/07/2020 20:18

Ignore. It's a residential area, not a library.

Yankathebear · 31/07/2020 20:19

Surely the only reasonable reaction would be to try to find out who it is and to apologise? I would be quite upset if I thought that my behaviour was upsetting those around me and would be trying to make amends.

I’m guessing they didn’t include your free gift of manners with your pool?

crimsonlake · 31/07/2020 20:21

Basically 5m from your pool to their house is too close.
Similar to trampolines, I really feel unless you have a large garden and can keep it well away from the neighbours properties then you really should not have one at all.
Consider how you would feel if it were the other way around?
Nobody finds their own children as loud or as annoying as other people do, perhaps consider that also.

strawberrymilkshakemonkey · 31/07/2020 20:21

noise laws say 11pm till 7am are when you should be quiet. obviiusly, at other times you should be considerate and not super noisy, but i can't imagine a few children in a pool is enough to seriously disturb them/stop them from hearing their TV etc. they clearly have too much time on their hands and particularly during the lockdown situation you'd think they'd have a bit of understanding of some children who are having fun, and not want to put a stop to it!

Flamingolingo · 31/07/2020 20:23

I’m more interested in how much the pool cost and how long it took? Our garden is perfect for a pool and DH is keen but I’m not!

uniglowooljumper · 31/07/2020 20:23

I would be pissed off if every time I tried to have a quiet drink in the garden come 9pm there were neighbours splashing around next door.
And honestly you probably would be too.

Is it that hard to imagine that hearing the noise it’s a bit annoying?

Why the presumption the OP would be annoyed at some idea of a 'quiet' drink in a garden? Some people are really not annoyed at all at people noise or the noise of children. Personally, I'm able to tune it out but realise some cannot so why would I presume everyone's like me the way you presumed the OP would be bothered by the noise of other people?

FabulouslyGlamourousFerret · 31/07/2020 20:23

I hate it when people deflect any criticism with 'they're jealous' ... so I'm on your neighbours side here, even if they are twats.

Tbf though I think though is made up goady bollocks!!

FelicityBob · 31/07/2020 20:24

Still hoping for a diagram

GreytExpectations · 31/07/2020 20:25

@SantaClaritaDiet

If anything, I highly doubt your 4 kids are quiet at all, more kids means more noise. I definitely believe the OP over you if I'm honest.

it's call teaching them manners... and respecting others. It seems to work for all my neighbours too as we all enjoy peaceful early mornings and evenings.

I love that it's normal for a teacher to handle a class of 30 kids without any of them screaming, screeching or shouting but a normal parent shouldn't be able to Grin

Hmm again you are assuming that OP's kid is being loud when she isn't. Also quite rude if you to suggest her kid hasn't been taught manners. Plus 8pm isn't late. I imagine you re probably one of the jealous neighbours Grin