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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have lost 20lbs and nobody has noticed

98 replies

babylukesmum · 31/07/2020 13:52

Hi everyone
During lockdown I went up to 12st 8lbs (I'm 5'10) and over the past 8 weeks have managed to lose 20lbs which I'm really proud of! :) I now weigh 11st 2lb. Would like to lose another 2lb so I weigh 11st exactly but I'm happy either way. The only thing is, nobody seems to of noticed. I'm feeling great in myself so don't mind (although would be lovely after all my hard work Grin) but it's got me wondering how much weight do you think you have to lose for it to be noticeable to other people? I would say I started feeling "lighter" after I lost 7lbs, and could see it myself after I lost 14lbs.

OP posts:
User87471643901065319 · 31/07/2020 14:14

At that height I doubt many would notice you having put 20 pounds on in the first place.

WanderingMilly · 31/07/2020 14:14

I bet you look wonderful and well done! It's my goal to lose 20lbs and I just can't, so you have done well.

I have no idea why no-one has noticed because I look much slimmer at only 7lbs loss and after a stone it's really, really noticeable. Perhaps they don't want to offend....or maybe they are jealous? Keep up the good work...

Boulshired · 31/07/2020 14:18

I never comment on weight unless asked, I usually compliment clothing as a code. I was with someone who innocently complimented an acquaintance who replied she had cancer of the stomach.

KizzyKat91 · 31/07/2020 14:20

I'm 5ft 10 and my weight can vary by 2 stone before my dress size changes and people start noticing! I find it bizarre, but I'm quite hourglass shaped (and tall) and I think the weight spreads evenly so it's not as noticeable when I lose or gain?
It also means I don't have much motivation to lose weight as I know I'd have to lose a lot to go down to a size 10, so why not just eat what I want and stay a size 12-14?

potter5 · 31/07/2020 14:25

Congratulations and well done. Smile

PickleSarnie · 31/07/2020 14:30

I'm 5'9" and, the bonus of being tall is I can put on a stone or so without anyone noticing. Downside is that the reverse is also true.

mummyof2boys30 · 31/07/2020 14:32

I've lost almost 2 stone in the last year. Only the last 1/2 stone people have started to comment. I would rather they didn't though lol

thousandflowers · 31/07/2020 14:32

@babylukesmum

Hi everyone During lockdown I went up to 12st 8lbs (I'm 5'10) and over the past 8 weeks have managed to lose 20lbs which I'm really proud of! :) I now weigh 11st 2lb. Would like to lose another 2lb so I weigh 11st exactly but I'm happy either way. The only thing is, nobody seems to of noticed. I'm feeling great in myself so don't mind (although would be lovely after all my hard work Grin) but it's got me wondering how much weight do you think you have to lose for it to be noticeable to other people? I would say I started feeling "lighter" after I lost 7lbs, and could see it myself after I lost 14lbs.
You say you "went up" to 12st8 in lockdown, what were you before lockdown, when people last saw you?
Beautiful3 · 31/07/2020 14:34

Well done that's fantastic! Once I told a friend how great she looked, she said that shes been very poorly and didn't intend on losing weight. That made me stop complimenting any friends weight loss, as we don't know peoples business and do not wish to offend.

Original poster
babylukesmum · 31/07/2020 14:35

@thousandflowers I was 12st 4lbs before. So if you take away the 4lbs I gained during lockdown, I have lost 16lbs :)

OP posts:
FizzyPink · 31/07/2020 14:38

Last summer I lost a stone and I’m quite slim anyway so no one really noticed day to day. However, when I posted a holiday photo in a bikini I got a lot of lovely comments.

Interestingly, when I have received comments on my appearance is when I’ve been going really hard in the gym but not necessarily dieting or losing weight. So I think people tend to notice your body shape changing/toning up more than weight loss

Ingridla · 31/07/2020 14:38

I feel like people are more reluctant to comment on women's weight these days, I'll bet you look amazing though! Well done 👍🏼

Dozer · 31/07/2020 14:38

It just means you have polite friends/family!

I lost 20lbs or so last year, v few people commented.

Gymntonic · 31/07/2020 14:39

I'm the same height as you OP. And have lost a similar amount in the past. I looked better in a swim suit, and as I carry excess weight on my thighs and hips, I could fit into some of my tighter trousers. Other than that, I think I just looked better in clothing. A dress size isn't that noticeable to anyone else. Well done though.

FortyFiedWine · 31/07/2020 14:42

Well done! Definitely don't assume people haven't noticed. It's just not polite to comment on someone's appearance really is it? I'm in a similar position, and the only people who've commented are the couple of friends I've actually told I'm trying to lose weight (they're making appropriately encouraging comments).

Plus one friend who noticed and commented how much better I look. If he wasn't such a good friend I'd be miffed, because what I heard is "you were a bit porky and not your most attractive before" Grin Which is true in my case, but who wants to hear that?

Endlessmizzle · 31/07/2020 14:45

when you saying 'following paul mckenna' what exactly does that mean? I am your height and have been trying really hard to lose weight (am veering between 10'12 on the very best day and 11'6 - I just yoyo between them.

Am doing fasting (mad), am coeliac, no sugar, lower carbs.

Are you walking or running? This may be my missing link (trapped with small kids).

MyShinyWhiteTeeth · 31/07/2020 14:47

I think sometimes people overestimate just how much attention people pay to others. They are more focused on their own lives.

I had my hair cut short and dyed an unnatural colour and my partner didn't notice. One week I had an important presentation and developed a huge pustule on the end of my nose. Until I pointed out the fleshy lump no one had supposedly noticed and 'it wasn't that big'.

On the other hand, one friend notices everything and comments on it. It feels stifling.

Mamabear12 · 31/07/2020 14:48

Some people are lucky in that they don’t put weight on their face much. So they can gain or lose 20lbs no one notices. I on the other hand get a fat face if I gain 5lbs! So if I lose weight people notice right away. Or if I gain!

Original poster
babylukesmum · 31/07/2020 14:49

Hi, I'm following the "rules" from the Paul McKenna book "I Can Make You Thin". Started beg of June and now 20lbs down. I am walking for about half an hr per day with the buggy, no running. I have small children too, DD 5 and DS 18mo so I totally understand the trapped feeling! Would love to be able to go to the gym if I could.

OP posts:
workhomesleeprepeat · 31/07/2020 14:50

My (male) boss lost 2 stone before noticed!

Original poster
babylukesmum · 31/07/2020 14:50

Thanks everyone SmileFlowers

OP posts:
peanutsandpinenuts · 31/07/2020 14:55

Like others have said its a bit iffy commenting on someones weight, you never know why they've lost it and how they feel about their body. I'm sure people have noticed though. And the main thing is you are feeling good about yourself. xx

Mustardpot · 31/07/2020 14:56

Well done on your weight loss!

Similar has happened to me and I was very cross about it Grin. I am only 5ft 5” and when I lost 20lbs no one said a thing. (since regained quite a bit of it). I do think it needs to be a couple of stone or more before people really notice, and then there are the people like one of my closest friends who wouldn’t dream of commenting if I lost or gained several stone. She just doesn’t think it’s important and also bit rude to say.

Enjoy your weight loss and well done especially as you have little ones.

zafferana · 31/07/2020 14:58

Thing is OP, you want people to notice when you LOSE weight and seemingly to comment on it, but do you feel the same when you gain? Presumably not! So to be on the safe side I never mention someone's weight, but if someone is looking well (regardless of weight) or wearing something that really looks good, I'll compliment them.

Also, if you gained in lockdown and then lost it again, why would people know that unless they'd seen you (which presumably they haven't)?

starfish4 · 31/07/2020 14:59

Firstly, well done on losing the weight. You should be proud of yourself and I hope you feel much better for it.

You mention your weight increase during lockdown. Did you actually see quite a few people immediately restrictions were lifted and then the same people within the last few days (not being critical if you have)? I half wonder if you haven't seen many people.