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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask for another handhold over the next few days?

473 replies

FruitLoopyLoo · 27/07/2020 17:19

A few people may remember my threads in the past. I have had a really, really difficult few years of recurrent pregnancy losses. In the past 3 years I've had 11 miscarriages ranging from 5-8 weeks.

Last time I asked for a handhold on here prior to a scan and I received so much support and love and it really helped. Unfortunately that time, we did see a heartbeat but it had stopped by the next scan.

I'm back again and I am now 12 weeks!!!! I have had a multitude of scans already and everything is looking super good this time, I can't quite believe we have got so far. I've seen baby bouncing about and legs and arms moving around everywhere, it's been amazing.

However, I'm back asking for another handhold please. When I was going through my miscarriages I was discovered to have a balanced translocation and a factor of that is I have a 5-6% chance of any child born having a severe genetic condition that would likely limit their life a lot.

Because of this I opted to have a test done. That was carried out last week and I am now waiting on the results. I am an anxious wreck. I am convinced the results will come back positive for the condition and whilst I know the odds are good they won't, I still can't believe anything good could actually happen to me. I don't even know if I'll be able to answer the phone when they ring to tell me as I feel I already know what they will say.

I really don't know what I'd do this time if this all went to pot again, I've invested too much hope this time that things may be okay and I just need a bit of a hold again please. I am so scared of going back to square one again after all of this.

OP posts:
Badgergirl123 · 21/01/2021 23:07

So happy for you OP! We had our lovely DD after five miscarriages so understand your anxieties so well. Good luck with the rest of it!

PyongyangKipperbang · 21/01/2021 23:09

How utterly joyous!

As someone who is also in double figures for miscarriages, I know well the fear. Every day you are waiting for (what feels like) the inevitable bad news because that is all you have ever had.

I am so so happy for you :) :)

Rayshine13 · 21/01/2021 23:14

Massive handhold op. Hope everything is well

NewAndImprovedNorks · 21/01/2021 23:15

Oh THERE you are!
And what a fabulous update

funnyoldonion · 21/01/2021 23:17

Exited for you to meet your little boy, best of luck to you! My nana had multiple miscarriages, 11 including twins and a little still born baby girl with black ringlets named Anne. I never forgot it my whole life, they feel like family to me, it's such an emotional journey. I had one miscarriage and I was on tenterhooks my whole pregnancy after but what came was a mirage of colour and beauty and love x

Mamanyt · 21/01/2021 23:18

Not handholding. I"m hugging you. And the virtual ones are quite safe! I'm almost 70 now, so think of me as a great-aunty you didn't know you had.

Brenna24 · 21/01/2021 23:35

I have just found your thread. I am so excited for you. I had 3 miscarriages, the first one a late MMC, then a diagnosis of high NK cells and hormone issues. Then finally my miracle. I remember all too well the miserable anxiety all through pregnancy (I had an anterior placenta too and could barely feel a thing - so unfair when you are the most on need of the reassurance). In the end my wee girl arrived at 34 weeks but was thankfully a big girl.for her gestation and healthy. She has just turned 3 and is the feistiest, kindest, funniest little lady. It is so worth the anguish of getting there. I was really holding out for a sibling for her, but it looks like that isn't to be. I am now reaching the point of acceptance for that. Now I am not sure that I can face going through what we went through to have our wee girl a second time. Re the sciatica, a bit late but lie on your side with a pillow between your knees to keep your legs in line. It helped me immensely.

Feedingthebirds1 · 21/01/2021 23:38

I've just found this thread. So pleased to read your latest update OP, I am now going to be on PINS for the next two weeks for you. However that means you can leave me to deal with any nerves, and you concentrate on being excited.

Yaay!

feelingfree17 · 21/01/2021 23:50

Oh - I am just over the moon for you. Bless you, you are soon to feel a love you never imagined possible
Cannot wait for your next post x

BabyBee93 · 21/01/2021 23:53

Just scrolling and wanted to leave some love here, what a joyously and genuinely kind thread!

So happy for you and keep us updated :)

TreadLightly3 · 21/01/2021 23:54

Fabulous news @FruitLoopyLoo! Good luck and enjoy your last few days of freedom! Smile

candle18 · 21/01/2021 23:55

Good luck, not long now! 👶

fizzandchips · 21/01/2021 23:56

Thank you for the update. Such an exciting, yet worrying time amongst all this. Wishing you a restful couple of weeks as you prepare to meet your son.

Nouveau2021 · 22/01/2021 00:03

I didn’t see your initial thread but I’m so happy for you Flowers

Not long to go till you meet your precious bundle ❤️

CountessFrog · 22/01/2021 00:05

What a great thread!

JaniceBattersby · 22/01/2021 00:05

What a lovely thread. All the very best of luck for a smooth and quick labour!

CoffeethenCrochet · 22/01/2021 00:06

Such a heartwarming thread. So happy you've got to this stage. Flowers

SirVixofVixHall · 22/01/2021 00:06

So excited for you ! Really lovely to see the scans.

TheRosesAreInBloom · 22/01/2021 00:09

A wonderful ending to your very sad journey and beautiful start to your new Chapter....can’t wait to hear the lovely news that he’s arrived !

Good luck OP x

Duemarch2021 · 22/01/2021 00:18

Awww amazing! Id love to know when hes here too! Currently pregnant with my first baby shes a little girl and am 34 weeks! Xxx

Cheeringmeup · 22/01/2021 00:19

Oh my goodness! I saw your thread last year and was so rooting for you, but too scared to post in case jinx.
I'm so pleased you're so close - best wishes for a safe and straightforward entrance to the world for your boy. Enjoy every moment x

Lalliella · 22/01/2021 00:21

Such a wonderful and positive thread! Thank you OP for sharing this with us. Hope the next 2 weeks go well and good luck for the birth. Can’t wait to hear about your beautiful baby Flowers

Dappled · 22/01/2021 00:23

I've only just come across your thread and how lovely to read something positive and joyous. Wishing you love and luck and please do update us all once your little boy is here!

Sushirolls · 22/01/2021 00:31

I've just come across your post.

Good luck and I look forward to hearing your great news, when your little one has arrived Flowers x

Wheresmykimchi · 22/01/2021 00:37

Hand hold!

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