School uniform and sweating

[Goingprivate2020]

Aibu to choose a school based on it having a white shirt/top as part of the uniform? The Academically best school Here has a blue shirt: utterly unforgiving for sweat stains. My husband and i are both sweaty, not often at a standing start but both of us in heat (over 24/25) and Exercise. More than most. I also sweat with nerves if I’m scared.. Kids are already quite sweaty too (at ten, one already has smelly pits without deodorant in the heat and had a sweaty back after riding with tight back protector on after a hot riding lesson this week).

I have always had to dress according to sweat. I know it’s tricky and when it’s hot I don’t wear certain colours. Certainly not grey or blue where sweat would show. I didn’t start sweating excessively until I was well into adulthood but had white school shirts so wouldn’t have been very conscious anyway. I am starting to think that an academically less impressive school with a whits top would be better holistically than an educational lifetime worrying about sweat at a formative stage of development. It could affect their confidence, distract them academically, be Acutely embarrassing. Aibu? Wwyd?

Personally, I’d address the sweating. For yourself and DCs. There are treatments, many of which are available on NHS.
www.nhs.uk/conditions/excessive-sweating-hyperhidrosis/

It’s affecting your lives to the point it your DCs could miss out on the academic opportunities they deserve.

Try Driclor anti perspirant. It was life changing for me.

Thanks @PlanDeRaccordement but its not so severe that it stops us doing stuff, it simply changeS what we wear at tones. Unfortunately that isn’t possible with a uniform. She doesn’t need drugs - and I wouldn’t want her growing body put on drugs - but I wonder if the risk of potential future embarrassment should trump an academically ‘better’ education. I realise ‘better’ is debatable anyway.

Go to the gp if the sweating is that bad.

Try different deodorants.

Buy enough shirts to launder them every day.

No of course you shouldn't decide your child's school based on uniform! Christ alive.

Get her a medicated deoderant and see a doctor about the hyperhydrosis that seems to run in your family.

It depends what you mean by less academically impressive. If it's a choice between a strong state school with reasonable results or a selective school that pushes academic attainment then I'd probably choose the strong state school because all round it's more holistic and the uniform would be a bonus.
If the choice is between a great state school and less academically impressive is another state school that has a limited curriculum and poorer results then I'd not choose to send my child there over a uniform because depending on school profile they may be the type of school that has fewer qualified teachers, high staff turnover and usually other issues in the school. The ongoing consequences of a poorer education would be more damaging.

I'd also suggest seeing the GP about excessive sweating for them.

@IamMaz, hi there. I did try it and during my dating years it helped to free up clothing. However, it didn’t stop other areas being sweaty in heat (ie back) and with sensitive skin it was Extremely painful (it stung continuously). I used it fot big Events but found the physical negatives outweighed benefits for me. It was easier and more comfy to adjust my clothes!

I suppose the issue has never interfered with what I’ve done. I was academically successful, attractive to men, I don’t think anyone would even know! Even my husband. But I moderate my clothing to avoid embarrassment in the heat. Small price as an adult but could be crippling for a child in puberty and really change their self-view and confidence.

No advice, I’m afraid. But I totally get where you’re coming from - we’re a sweaty family and I think I would have the same dilemma. Luckily the school my daughter’s going up to has white polo shirts as the uniform.

Does the blue uniform have to be a cotton shirt or can they wear polo shirts that might reduce the sweat patches? Also, is there a summer dress option, for when it’s really hot or is it blue shirt all year round?

Good luck with whatever you decide x

I absolutely know what you mean. I had this problem at school and with pale blue shirts. I remember being boiling hot but having to keep my jumper on.
I think it’s a nice thing for you to think of.
I don’t think I would send my children to a worse school to avoid it. I don’t know what the answer is - but I sympathise!

@Mydogisthebestest we always buy 5 of everything just because kids get lucky. Would stop an embarrassing sweat patch or a teenage gobshite pointing it out.

I remember doing a Professional course in extreme heat at 22-23 and facing sweat patches. If was mortifying.

@Bitchinkitchen I’ve addressed that further up. The ‘medical’ deodorant physically hurts and irritates sensitive skin and doesn’t stop the rest of the body sweating. We are not serious enough conditions for drugs but enough to be hyper sensitive to sweat patches and I want to shield my daughter from the embarrassment.

I think your issue is anxiety really. No its not really normal to make such a big deal about sweating. Give your kids the best opportunity to excel in school. Use deodorant like the rest of the sweating world. Maybe stop overthinking it. Sorry but this can't be good for your kids if you are micro thinking if they will sweat in their uniform. I ride also and a back protector is an almost perfect place to sweat on a hot day - how could it not be?

So go to the gp. There’s options other than a less good school.

@LolaSmiles there is a good local secondary and a less academically strong private both with white shirts. We have choices.

@ChazP and @Shoppingwithmother - thank you!!

I understand.

Posters that say try different deoderant, go to gp, wash shirts everyday haven't experienced it.
I suffer too, I don't smell but I get very wet, of course we wash shirts everyday. I use a good Deoderant and wash well with soap but it doesn't stop the wetness. It's not bad enough to be on drugs from GP for a lifetime though.

To answer your question, yes I would seriously consider it. You know your children and know how they will get on. The most academic school is definitely not always the best one anyway.

Sweat stains won't be so bad if your child starts the day with a shower and a good antiperspirant. I presume he or she will be changing when they get it and you'll wash the shirt. I sweat a lot when it's warm (though managed to somehow look cool (I mean low temp), so people told me); all our clothes went into the machine in the evening and sweat stains didn't remain. We didn't use sticky deodorants which are dreadful for staining.

For goodness sake, don't turn down a good school on account of the colour of the shirts! It would be far worse if it was a no uniform school.

Have you tried Mitchem deodorant? I also sweat a lot (Hyperhydhrosis) and tried all the medicated deodorants only to find they sting and irritate my skin. Mitchem helps and doesn't sting at all, I find the stick works better than the spray. I also use Odaban on my face in the summer, you dab a tiny amount on your face/neck at night for up to 5 days then once a week after, it works! You can get it from Boots, it's expensive but worth it and the bottle lasts ages.

I was going to suggest Driclor or Perspirex but you seem to have discounted those OP. I find Perspirex stings less and personally have found these deodorants game changing. Use roughly once every 2 weeks and I’m covered.

I meant, 'get in', as in home from school, not 'get it'.

@Jakey056 perhaps but I have empathy and sympathy for them. It’s like if you were an acne sufferer - you’d try to reduce their embarrassment and suffering and be acutely aware of the MH issues surrounding it. I might be overthinking it but if it avoids acute embarrassment for my kids, I’ll take that. I’m very interested in counter views though, whether that worry should trump an otherwise ‘better’ (academically) school.

Oh and white clothes stain with sweat too, look just as bad. Just avoid the staining, it isn't difficult.

OP lots of schools have a different summer uniform from winter uniform. My school allowed you to wear t-shirts and polo shirts.

Regardless choose the school that suits your child best academically. If the worse comes to the worse your child will just need to learnt to take a spare top to school in summer and change it part way through the day. Remember sweat only smells if it dries.

How many days if the year is it going to be that hot?

Possibly summer term some days and maybe September.