To not see a solution other than not using my garden?

[Cebr]

Or moving (which for various reasons I can't do).

My neighbours, family A (one side - other side are elderly and largely housebound) are arseholes of the highest order, as are their kids. They are pally with other neighbours, family B, between them they have 9 kids who are all pretty poorly behaved.

On a daily basis they ride bikes and scooters in my front driveway which is bad enough but the real issue is in the back garden.
As kids (often with Bs kids as they are in and out of each others gardens and houses constantly) deliberately throw balls, toys and indeed their rubbish into my garden.
They play ball up against my fence constantly (they broke the previous fence)
Let themselves into my garden - the gate is locked but they have climbed the fence before now
When I'm out in the garden they name-call me and my children. Or bang the fence constantly.
They sit on top of the fence and look into my house.

I hardly ever go in the garden now. What was a lovely space (it's a good size about 80ft x 40ft) is now completely overgrown.

I had a gardener round today and they all started banging on the fence. Then standing on it shouting for their ball etc. The guy said 'is it always like this?' and I said sadly yes. Wouldn't blame him for not taking the job!

I have in the past told the children to stop. This resulted in Dad B telling me he would sort me out if I ever spoke to his kids again. Mum and Dad A said kids were just being kids and they were doing no harm.

I contacted the police about the threat from B. They said as nothing had happened they wouldn't get involved. I explained about the kids but as they are all under 13 the advice was I should try not to antagonise the situation ie stay indoors. So that's what I've been doing.

I was hoping one or both families would move as they live in 2 bed houses but this doesn't look like happening anytime soon. I can't move. I would like to use the garden though but their behaviour makes it unbearable.

Is there anything else I can do to make it more tolerable? Or to stop me feeling sick every time I open the door hearing their screaming and banging, and seeing my fence shaking?

Rosa Rugosa's lovely, but not a dog rose. (Dog rose - rosa canina - is indigenous rose, single and pale pink, heart shaped leaves). Rugosas are wonderfully spiky buggers and will grow just about anywhere! They smell amazing, too.

This sounds awful for you, I wish I had something to suggest. If my kids were hopping into neighbours gardens and being rude and destroying property I’d be mortified and furious with them! The parents clearly couldn’t care less so I don’t think the kids’ behaviour will ever improve. It’s so unfair for you.

Because I am a complete bitch I would set a trap for them.

You said the neighbours kids like to hop your fence and come into you garden. It would be so unfortunate if you left something seemingly valuable out on the garden for them to see and then recorded them nicking it.

Or perhaps record the abuse they give you and cut it into a compilation tape and send it to both parents and all the other neighbours. Or even put it on the local Facebook page.

People only act like this if they think they’ll get away with it.

@TheSunIsStillShining

Didn't poison the dog. Made it sleep a lot. Otherwise they left the doors open and encouraged him to play in our part of the garden. If you read it and it comes across as I'm the terrible person than you have something wrong with you. Threatening to run over a child multiple times and throwing glass at him, injuring a toddler... and I'm a terrible person for wanting to have a few non-panicky days without being constantly on alert about dog? (you do understand how phobias work, right?).

I was surprised as well that the takeaway from your post was "poisoning the dog"...

@CountreeGurl

Buy one of those machines that emits the noise that only young people can hear

AGREE! I have read that they are very effective. Seems a lot of commercial premises use them.

From 2015. With apologies to Daily Mail haters.

'A pensioner who says local children made his life 'hell' put anti-vandal paint on his garden fence to stop them climbing on it and throwing stones at his windows.

Robert Brown also reported the youngsters to police and was delighted when officers came round to speak to him.

He assumed it was to take details of his plight – and was shocked to learn he was being prosecuted for criminal damage because the children had got the paint over their clothes.'

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2913930/Pensioner-life-hell-local-children-charged-anti-vandal-paint-ruined-yobs-clothes.html

Several people have suggested loud music. Wagner at full blast is particularly good. If you wear noise cancelling headphones hopefully you won't be able to hear it.

Gosh I’m so sorry. What a horrible situation.

If you don’t want to move, and let’s face it, why should you? I’d do what others have suggested and go for deterrents, put up a high trellis with prickly plants climbing up it along your boundary, encourage brambles and holly wherever they enter your property, and also stinging nettles at ground level.
I’d be very tempted to get a dog that barks incessantly at them if they bang the fence and that chews up all the balls. Nothing aggressive but something that notices and makes a noise if they come in your garden or sit on your fence looking into your house. But dogs are hard work... maybe beekeeping would have a simillar effect and bees don’t need walking.

Use your garden as much as possible and put music on so they know you are there.

It’s harder for them to rationalise their use of your garden as ‘well there’s no harm as she’s indoors’ if you are obviously using it.
Invite your kids friends in groups of 6 to socialise in your garden.
Put a high fence up on the other side so they can’t shout over to the other neighbours.

It’s hard to stop them using your driveway, other than offering your spare space to a friend who needs space for a hobby car or a caravan, there is not much you can do. I suppose if they are out the front cycling, they will not be in the garden looking over at you.

It’s truly a crap situation. I hope they move.

Maybe it’s time to take up the bagpipes and join the local charismatic church — you can have bagpipe lessons and prayer meetings in your garden.

Good luck x

Surely your kids would rather move house & schools than live there?

Is defintely recommend cameras everywhere. We've just bought them and I feel so much better. We've had problems with our neighbours for years and years (no kids just an older couple and the husband is a bit job). Regularly damaging our property, shouting over he's going to smash up our cars, shouting that he knows when we leave the house, cutting electricity cables in our garden etc...total fruit loop. I always felt uneasy being in the garden with the children as I never knew when he was going to kick off. We've NEVER retaliated and we've had to call the police on quite a few occasions. They always go and talk to him but that's as far as it goes, and he then thinks it's funny. After another incident at Easter, because we dared to have a BBQ in the garden we called the police and decided we were going to get cameras, I love them. I feel so much better knowing the next thing he does will be recorded and then we'll have actual evidence that the police can't ignore. One of the cameras also has audio, so it will record him kicking off and threatening us. I'm quite looking forward to the next incident now, hopefully wipe the smug smile off his face.

Sorry to put a real downer on this, but I think you have to disclose ‘neighbourhood disputes’ if you sell a property. So although a really bad situation, don’t raise the bar too much, or if/when you move the neighbour rows will have to be disclosed....but I could be wrong.
Only other suggestion is prickles hedging to stop them sitting on the fence. Holly, Berber is, pyracantha...all would make it uncomfortable to sit on the fence. This is the sort of thing that really frightens me. We would quite like to move nearer the coast, but I’m really anxious about getting noisy/anti-social neighbours.

I just want to reiterate what a PP said about The Mosqito

Only kids can hear it and it can look very discreet

You might find this helpful, OP.

thecrimepreventionwebsite.com/garden-boundaries-fences-and-defensive-plants/618/defensive-plants-shrubs-and-trees-shrub-fences/

I rather like the sound of the Elaeagnus Augustifolia: fast growing and has scented flowers. What's not to like?

Things like that make me really angry. Get massive loud speakers stick them in the garden and blast off Beijing opera all day. That will give them something to think about.

I haven’t read the whole thread, but saw that you mentioned grime and drill music. I’m saying this in the nicest possible way-are you black or mixed race?
If so, perhaps your neighbours behaviour is racist abuse? Surely then, the police have more to go on???
I hope you make some progress with it, and find some peace one way or another 🤞

Barbed wire in a trellis on top of a higher fence OP? And a sprinkler system.

And then just ignore, ignore, ignore.

It must be utterly awful. I do feel for you.

Start sunbathing naked? Might just shock them

Go to your nearest exotic pet shop. But a box of cockroaches. Wipe the box down, put in the fridge for a few minutes. When the cockroaches have gone to sleep, loosen the lid and (wearing gloves) slide the box into a close fitting envelope. . Seal, post to the neighbours . They open the envelope, the box opens and the cockroaches have a new home.

Doesn't fix the problem but it will make you feel less powerless. And it could get them to move!

As someone who has had similar issues with intimidating neighbours I can only sympathise . Speak to their landlord and community police officer ...get as much height as you can to separate you and then and this is the hard bit - front it out .. it’s taken all my gumption for spend time on my garden but I have done this year for the first time in 3 years - get your headphones on and just try your best to be out there ... and record every episode of anti social behaviour ... And try and move but don’t be a prisoner until that time comes - these situations don’t last forever trust me x

You need some nice holly bushes!! High and mighty. They hurt like hell. I really feel for you and hope you beat these turds!

Plant yourself a blackthorn hedge. Honestly, it's the most lethal plant I've ever come across. It also looks very pretty when it flowers. Also get that thing that makes a noise, as others have said, and get CCTV trained on your garden.

And good luck.

"thenightsky

Grow pyracantha up against the fence. Its the spikest thing I've ever come across. Agony if it catches you."

I did this all along our fence to stop neighbours kids climbing over it and I agree, it is absolute agony. I was wearing garden gloves and a spike got my thumb, I thought I'd been stung by a wasp or worse! It stopped the kids! My mum called me cruel but they could easily avoid it by not coming on to my property!!

Do you own cats? If you don't you can get spikes that are meant to be used as cat repellents. We put them on our bottom fence when he had people climbing over our fence to break in. Think amazon sell them. It was suggesting to us by a police officer as they said legally we can say we had a "cat problem" 😉

Hiya - don't be intimidated. Use your garden and challenge anti-social behaviour when it arises.
I live in an area with a drug problem and have a communal garden. During lockdown my daughter and I spent several hundred on plants and soil, bird feeders etc to make the area nicer. Some neighbours love it and respect it. Some don't. My advice is - reclaim your space - try to speak reasonably and calmly with the children who knock the ball into your fence - could they earn some money in your garden cutting back the weeds??

Maybe the parents are antagonistic because they've been complained about before and only know one way of interacting(?)
It sounds like an amazing space - invite your friends over - reclaim it and stick up for yourself.

Have you thought about getting one of those gadgets that emit a high pitched noise? They're marketed for problematic cats and dogs, but kids can't stand them either.
Just set it going when they're being arseholes and let pavlov sort the rest out