If you're a size 8-10 (or your ideal) but not naturally slim how do you stay that way?

[overweightcat]

I know some people are just naturally rather petite or slim and willowy.

But if you're not and manage to stay a size 8-10 how do you do it?

I'm 5'5 and recently lost weight and gone down to a solid size 12 - 10 in certain shops. Beforehand it was on the larger side of size 14.
I used to be very slim in my teens, had a terrible diet full of crap and sweets but was also very active around 8hrs a week of various sports/dance activities. I became quite sedentary and steadily piled on the weight since.

I don't have long legs or a small frame or anything - if anything I find that I'm rather in proportion all around and when I used to do a lot of sports I looked slim and athletic not willowy (which I'd prefer TBH).
Size 8-10 is my ideal I think as I've recently seen pictures of myself when I was that size and I think that's when I looked my healthiest and fittest - but I'm not sure how to get there.

My weight is at a bit of a standstill at the moment and I want to lose in a sustainable way. I probably have about 9lbs to go.

So anyone who has managed to achieve that and stay the desired size - can you share how you did it?

For me it's all about the snacking.

If I don't snack and eat healthy ish meals three times a day, I can more or less eat what I like. I do avoid out and out junk food but that's mostly because I don't enjoy it these days.

As soon as I start snacking, even healthy fruit/yogurt, the weight starts going on.

I run about 35 miles a week all year and cycle about 50 miles per week in summer. I'm a fair weather cyclist and in winter I do yoga and spin classes instead.

I’m 5ft 4 and a size 10. I’ve been a size 8 but honestly don’t look my best at that size.

4 years ago I was a size 14/16. Then I got diagnosed with T1 diabetes and Hashimoto (autoimmune hypothyroidism). I’d probably been living with the latter for a while as I always found it extraordinarily hard to lose weight.

Being medicated properly and switching to a low carb diet meant losing heaps of weight.

I definitely look better in clothes now, but I’d also rather not have two life long conditions.

Also - skinny fat is a thing.

Don’t body builders have to eat loads

No. Probably less than you might think.

@randomer what an utterly ridiculous thing to say!
Can someone only be fun and interesting if they are free and easy with food?

My work colleague is tiny and she eats a limited diet to stay that way but she is great company and would be first on anyone's list if we were planning a night out etc

What a tiny mind you have.

I think that for some people (I'm guessing @managedmis and I'd include myself) they feel that it is a choice between being slim (size 8/10) and being massively overweight and risking the health problems that being obese brings. Before you bite, let me explain:

If I am a size 10, I have to work at it to stay there. But at that size, I am light enough to exercise, and do it well. Because of my ultra-competitive nature, I hate doing something I'm crap at, so if I run 5k when I'm a size 14, I'm slow, it hurts my knees, and I don't enjoy it, so I feel rubbish, whereas if I'm a size 10, it hurts less and I go faster, so I enjoy it more.

Also, if I'm a size 14, I feel fat and horrible, so it starts affecting my mental health. So I eat more, put on more weight and suddenly I'll find I'm a size 18 and obese.

So for some people, who have a complicated relationship with food or their weight, it does feel like a binary choice between being a size 8/10 and being a size 18/20.

I'm not saying that's right, and I fully recognise that it's not a great state of mind to be in, and I sincerely wish it was a simple as saying "don't obsess about your weight" and "don't connect your happiness with your size" but that's just like saying "don't be depressed" to someone with depression, or "don't have a broken leg" to someone with a broken leg. I'm working on it though, so if anyone has any tips on how to break the connection, please please tell me.

Also, a PP said that as long as we are healthy e.g. such as no high blood glucose, no fatty liver, no pain, no raised inflammation markers, good bone density, - I absolutely agree, but I don't know about most people, but I think these markers are pretty hard to judge without tests, so maintaining a healthy is the best way to reduce the risk. There is probably a proportion of women who are a size 18 and have healthy markers, and but I bet there is a much much bigger proportion of women who are a size 10 with healthy markers.

BMI is not perfect, but until they find simple test that you can do every morning in the space of 10 seconds, I think the scales have to be the best way of testing all those markers.

I think it’s the people that make a diet their everything and sole topic of conversation that aren’t good company

@jan9876 that plan sounds really interesting, but quite a hefty price tag at £99! Would you say it was worth it?

It’s Brussels sprouts season down here! Food of the gods must be the most mumsnet sentence of all time! I would not want to live in that house!!!

I sound similar to you in that when Im doing a lot of exercise Im a size 10, but athletic looking possible with a bit of a tummy still rather than "willowy". I have in the past managed to get down to a "willowy" size 8 (and weighed about 51-52 kg) through doing lots of exercise and severly restricting what I ate (lots of veg etc). However, my periods stopped for over a year and looking back at photos I think I looked emaciated rather than willowy. Which isnt to say size 8 isnt a perfectly healthy size for lots of people, but I think it might be better to aim for a healthy size that suites your natural body type.

@WhatWillSantaBring

I think that you're doing great and that your state of mind sounds perfectly balanced. The only thing likely to throw things out of kilter are some folk on here advising you that it isn't a healthy way to live. For you, it is.

You do you and leave them to manage their own sizes

@Eddielzzard It was for me, I know its there for any time I start to struggle again and just really helped me understand my relationship with food. Took time though.

I think it’s the people that make a diet their everything and sole topic of conversation that aren’t good company

Agreed. But ..... anyone with a sole topic of conversation about any subject isn't gonna be somebody you want to get stuck in the lift with overnight

@jan9876 thank you. I'm very seriously considering it. I'm getting fatter as I get older and can't seem to do anything about it, despite depriving myself. And to no end it seems.

I don't deny myself anything but I do watch my total food intake. Not to the extent of weighing anything, cutting out particular food groups or cooking methods, just everything in moderation. I also spend about 5 hours in the gym every week.

I'm 5'6" and around 8st 3ish. An easy 6 in most things.

I don't agree that tracking food takes seconds . I have logged my food many times in my various 6-12 month diets to lose weight. MFP takes ages to set up the first time.as you have to enter all of the ingredient for your home cooked meals.. So every time you want to try a new recipe you have to enter the list of ingredients . I found it a real pain as we often try out new recipes at home as I get really bort eating the seems thing all the time. In fact it worked better with processed foods ( something I was trying to avoid) as you could scan the bar code.quickly.

I just could not continue logging everything I eat forever. I would find that an unacceptable price for the difference between being a size 8 and a size 10/12 it maybe even a bit bigger. I appreciate it is not a price to high for others though

My personal opinion is that finding a size that is reasonable ( ideally not obese if possible) and you are happy with in terms.of what you can eat and working on accepting that size and staying there seems a much healthier goal than micormanaging food intake to stay a size smaller then you might be otherwise.

Counting calories is really hard I've found if cooking meals from scratch for a family them taking a portion for yourself

I've always been a small size 8 (6-8 for years) and I think a big part of it is genetics. I've always eaten sugary foods but I rarely drink alcohol. My DH is the same and thinks it's alcohol that makes a lot of people put on weight.

After having my DD I'm about a size 10 but want to get back to my smaller size and it's t hard!

I use a calorie tracking app and I know I would never use if I had to add ingredients/weights of meals, so I just take approximations.

So if I cook a pasta dish, have a portion (on a small plate) and then I’ll just log the nearest equivalent (e.g. M&S ready meal) in the app.

I know it’s not exact but it still helps me realise how much I’m eating.

I actually think this is a really interesting thread, even the arguments.

For me, it shows that for people to stay slim, it means no snacking; not much (if any) alcohol; regular, probably daily, exercise; and generally healthy eating ie avoiding takeaways, processed food etc.

All probably fairly common sense but I suppose it depends on willpower and the individual's priorities. Some people would rather enjoy life by not worrying about what they eat or feeling restricted etc and perhaps be a larger clothes size, while others prefer to be a smaller size and don't mind any potential restriction or are happy to spend the time eg exercising to counteract their calorific intake.

And I echo a PP - why are clothes sizes always even numbers?!

I’m a size 8-10 and 55kg

I don’t eat sugary or processed foods but don’t restrict carbs or fats

I run twice a week only a couple of miles each time and then a yoga class twice a week

I think the key is consistency. Find exercise you enjoy and healthy foods you like and stick to a routine - it’s a lifestyle choice but you should enjoy it too! Good luck

I am 5ft 6 and my natural “comfortable weight” would probably have me in a 12, approx 72kg which was my state at uni when I first had control of my own diet.

I am now a consistent 8-10 (big boobs won’t shrink no matter how much I lose!) and about 65kg but toned and muscles rather than any real fat.

Key for me was nothing to do with diet, although my natural tastes are for high protein, probably to fuel all the exercise. Dinner will be something like chilli over baked sweet potato, sausage and lentil casserole, we have pasta or rice once a week so naturally pretty average.

What changed it for me was exercise. I also used to dance a lot and then became sedentary so I joined a gym and got into weight training which gave me tone and a good base strength. I then signed up for a marathon which got me in the shape of my life. I now run an average of 20 miles per week, with one marathon a year which means a 16 week period where my mileage increases from 20 miles a week to 40 by the end. Pre lockdown this would have been accompanied by 2 x weights sessions in the gym and a gentle swim. I love being active and feeling fit and strong so I focus on this rather than food.

I have to eat enough to fuel all the activity but generally eat what I like. I get my 5 a day most days and sometimes more but also need to eat plenty of protein and carbs so that means overall it’s a balanced diet. If I want to treat myself we always have ice cream in the freezer; some weeks it comes out every night, some weeks only once! We have a takeaway every Friday, lunches are either homemade soup or leftovers and I do one batch of baking per week (flapjacks, cookies, cake) that we both have one portion per day of. We had a BBQ with family on Friday and I had 2 burgers, 1 sausage with onions and cheese but only 1 roll as that’s all I wanted as I knew there was also cake. So yes, everything in moderation!

I also don’t drink any calories. I drink water and green tea throughout the work day with maybe the odd iced coffee. Never drink anything fizzy as I don’t like it and no interest in alcohol.

These are all natural choices regarding diet- that’s just my preferences. The exercise is what I push myself to keep on top of and allows me to eat like that.

I am around a size 14 if I eat normally (being mindful but not strict)
If I am fairly strict I go down to a size 12.
What made me go to a size 10 was a strict diet of no processed foods. No sugar, no processed carbs, no potatoes or rice or pasta or bread, high natural fat (avacado and meat / some nuts) and literally sticking to it pretty much all the time (the occasional meal out or night out aside).
It’s so simple yet so hard as the will power needed is immense. Once one a roll though it becomes more natural but if you fall off the wagon it’s hard to get back on!
It totally works though! Try no processed foods, nothing that’s been through a factory except meat) no sugar or wheat and no carbs foods such as potatoes, beans, grain or rice. Just have meat or fish and veg with a few nuts and some fruit plus eggs!
I tell you the weight falls off

Oh and with the above diet you can eat pretty much of it as you like (except the nuts and carbs fruit which should be limited)

For me, it shows that for people to stay slim, it means no snacking; not much (if any) alcohol; regular, probably daily, exercise; and generally healthy eating ie avoiding takeaways, processed food etc.

Which is how we were designed to live, when you think about it.

Historically, most people have had manual, active jobs - alongside no access to processed foods and very few snacks. Even when I was young in the nineties, snacking wasn't really a "thing". I would be starving by the time I sat down to dinner but it was just normal to feel that way. If I'd asked for a snack after school, my parents would have looked at me like I had two heads

I read threads on here where people think it's normal to have takeaways every week, or even multiple times a week. Takeaway coffees are also seen as normal. Supermarket meal deals that probably have well over 800 calories each. All those things add up, but if you bring it up on an eating thread, you're told you're food obsessed or have an eating disorder!