If you're a size 8-10 (or your ideal) but not naturally slim how do you stay that way?

[overweightcat]

I know some people are just naturally rather petite or slim and willowy.

But if you're not and manage to stay a size 8-10 how do you do it?

I'm 5'5 and recently lost weight and gone down to a solid size 12 - 10 in certain shops. Beforehand it was on the larger side of size 14.
I used to be very slim in my teens, had a terrible diet full of crap and sweets but was also very active around 8hrs a week of various sports/dance activities. I became quite sedentary and steadily piled on the weight since.

I don't have long legs or a small frame or anything - if anything I find that I'm rather in proportion all around and when I used to do a lot of sports I looked slim and athletic not willowy (which I'd prefer TBH).
Size 8-10 is my ideal I think as I've recently seen pictures of myself when I was that size and I think that's when I looked my healthiest and fittest - but I'm not sure how to get there.

My weight is at a bit of a standstill at the moment and I want to lose in a sustainable way. I probably have about 9lbs to go.

So anyone who has managed to achieve that and stay the desired size - can you share how you did it?

@PerpetuallyUnderwhelmed

This is no criticism of any PP but it makes me really sad to see the number of women who devote so much time and energy to tracking their food to maintain a weight that they have decided they need to be. What could be achieved if all that headspace was directed elsewhere?!

This is what I was thinking. It's scary and depressing.

Some people would rather enjoy life by not worrying about what they eat or feeling restricted etc and perhaps be a larger clothes size, while others prefer to be a smaller size and don't mind any potential restriction or are happy to spend the time eg exercising to counteract their calorific intake.

I don't think you could have gotten this more backwards if you were deliberately trying. I have never, ever, ever enjoyed life more than I did once I found my 'sport.' Discovering that I'm actually really quite talented at something I always fantasised about has been the second most amazing thing I've ever done in my life. (The first was having my DS.) And now I've found it, I crave it. I spent 3 hours at it last night and I'm on an absolute high today. A part of me is counting down the minutes until my alarm goes off tomorrow morning and I can get back to it. Often on a Sunday I'd happily spend 6 hours 'exercising' but I'll have to cut it short at 3 because I have a party to go to, which is probably a good thing as I'm still a little bit convalescent.

And the bonus to having that kind of activity level is that everything in life just becomes more pleasurable. Even just walking to the kitchen on strong leg muscles is deeply pleasurable. And I'm always a type of ravenous. Like I'm not hungry in a starving myself way but my body is always working so when it gets food, nearly everything I eat is the best thing I've ever eaten. Especially fruit and vegetables. Almost every single apple I eat is the most delicious apple to have ever grown. Weirdly, roast beetroot has become the most insanely satisfying food ever. And while I still like chocolate and cake and ice-cream, it doesn't yield the same pleasure as good food. Because my mind and body are in sync in a way that it just isn't when I'm not fit.

When I'm not fit, I crave those sugary foods. Having being sick through spring and early summer, my physical pleasure came from eating whatever I felt like and I ate loads of sugary crap. And it's clear that all of that pleasure from sugary crap is just a so-so substitute for the deep, real pleasure of using your body the way it's meant to be used.

I'd be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy how being fit makes me look. In fact I'm genuinely pissed off that since I've been ill I've had to go back up to size 6 jeans and lost my 6 pack. I loved being lean and muscular and I'm pretty keen to get back to that. But that's just a bonus compared to the near constant high of being able to actually use my body in a way that I always thought was just a dream.

When I go out for a meal I don't have a starter or dessert, just a main course and leave half of it. I have my dinner/ lunch on small plates only at home, No crisps, chocolate. If I have a take away or pizza I have an apple and raised the next day. I have slim fast milkshakes, rivitas, slim a soup usually for lunch. Xx

For these saying that 1200 calories a day is shocking for those of who are short with sluggish metabolisms (me ) this is just what we need to stick to.

I do let myself have a couple of meals out or takeaways a week.

I’m not aiming for Hollywood thin. Just a healthy BMI.

Oh and like previous posters no three course meals out for me. Sometimes I’ll just have a starter instead of a main. I barely drink alcohol either so I can’t cut back there.

@alittleprivacy

Some people would rather enjoy life by not worrying about what they eat or feeling restricted etc and perhaps be a larger clothes size, while others prefer to be a smaller size and don't mind any potential restriction or are happy to spend the time eg exercising to counteract their calorific intake.

I don't think you could have gotten this more backwards if you were deliberately trying. I have never, ever, ever enjoyed life more than I did once I found my 'sport.' Discovering that I'm actually really quite talented at something I always fantasised about has been the second most amazing thing I've ever done in my life. (The first was having my DS.) And now I've found it, I crave it. I spent 3 hours at it last night and I'm on an absolute high today. A part of me is counting down the minutes until my alarm goes off tomorrow morning and I can get back to it. Often on a Sunday I'd happily spend 6 hours 'exercising' but I'll have to cut it short at 3 because I have a party to go to, which is probably a good thing as I'm still a little bit convalescent.

And the bonus to having that kind of activity level is that everything in life just becomes more pleasurable. Even just walking to the kitchen on strong leg muscles is deeply pleasurable. And I'm always a type of ravenous. Like I'm not hungry in a starving myself way but my body is always working so when it gets food, nearly everything I eat is the best thing I've ever eaten. Especially fruit and vegetables. Almost every single apple I eat is the most delicious apple to have ever grown. Weirdly, roast beetroot has become the most insanely satisfying food ever. And while I still like chocolate and cake and ice-cream, it doesn't yield the same pleasure as good food. Because my mind and body are in sync in a way that it just isn't when I'm not fit.

When I'm not fit, I crave those sugary foods. Having being sick through spring and early summer, my physical pleasure came from eating whatever I felt like and I ate loads of sugary crap. And it's clear that all of that pleasure from sugary crap is just a so-so substitute for the deep, real pleasure of using your body the way it's meant to be used.

I'd be lying if I said that I didn't enjoy how being fit makes me look. In fact I'm genuinely pissed off that since I've been ill I've had to go back up to size 6 jeans and lost my 6 pack. I loved being lean and muscular and I'm pretty keen to get back to that. But that's just a bonus compared to the near constant high of being able to actually use my body in a way that I always thought was just a dream.

Absolutely this.

I was always a fat child, grew up in a fat family. Not overweight, morbidly obese.

In my early 20s I decided to lose weight. Went from 15 stone to 9 stone in a year through sheer will power, calorie control and I found my love - running.

I am now 41 and have been running for 20 years. I can still remember the sense of accomplishment of the first half marathon I completed. I couldn’t believe the ‘fat kid’ could ever do that.

My whole life is different to the one I grew up in. My children have never known a life where inactivity is normal. I married a PE teacher!

People think being slim comes easy to my family but actually it’s because we eat very healthily and we are very active. Like the poster I quoted, we enjoy the way fresh food tastes and the way our bodies feel when we’re active.

That’s a great way of describing it.

I’ve posted this before but I run 40km a week and I love it. Discovering longer distance running has been revelatory particularly as I was a sprinter at school and was awful at longer distances (childhood asthma didn’t help, and I’ve somehow grown out of that). Being good at something physical again, has been just wonderful - particularly because it’s something I thought wasn’t “for me”. If I couldn’t run I would be very upset.

The physical effect is secondary, though lovely. I’m 5’10” and while I’ve never been overweight (I have been severely underweight due to an eating disorder as a team) my BMI is now in the 19’s and I’m more toned than I’ve ever been. While eating over 2,000 calories per day. I’ve been eating Keto for years and continue to do that for the energy benefits, joints etc. If you’d told teenage me that I would be running, eating over 2,000 calories a day and feeling full/no longer in a war with sugar... this is living the dream.

So... not everyone feels like they’re suffering or restricting to be thin.

Surely there hs to be some sort of mid way between extremes.

I can't think that ordering 2 starters and leaving most of one, is a joyful evening out. Nor that a snack a soup for dinner is caring for your health.

Surely there has to be some sort of mid way between extremes.

Of course there is. The way most normal size 8/10s eat.

Being healthy and being thin aren't always the same thing.

Yes, a morbidly obese person will not be healthy but a slightly overweight person could be.

Likewise a very thin person could be surviving on coffee and fags.

I’m 5ft 3 and 8.5 st so around an 8-10
I dint drink ( nothing to do with weight) and I eat normally and snack. I dint restrict any foods. If I have a big meal out I’ll try and eat more mindfully the next day.
I’m fairly active as in walking with the dog and have an active job but don’t do any sports

@NiceLegsShameAboutTheFace

This thread is so depressing. There is more to life than being a size 8!

Meh! Being a size 6/8 is pretty fundamental to my life. I'm not, nor have I ever been, depressed about it. I'm not usually joyless either, although being stuck in this prison home office has tested the status quo on occasion.

I very much agree with this. It's the same trite nonsense that people who have a problem with alcohol say.. that non-drinkers are boring or the 'fun police'. That's the addiction talking and it is those who have a problem with over-drinking, over-eating that say it.

Everybody else minds their own bodies and their own business.

Walking round the kitchen on strong leg muscles 🤣🤣🤣

I do agree with you by the way @alittleprivacy, that part just sounds so funny.

The way most normal size 8/10s eat

Can't help wondering what a normal 10/12 eats or ( dare I even type this....) a 12/14?

I can only assume by the time we get to size 16 threre is no normal.

What about blokes? What does your normal neck size 16 eat?

@WhatWillSantaBring

This is really interesting and a bit of a contract to the habits of people who consider themselves naturally thin. i has a post that asked the question - 28 pages of answers can be distilled as saying many “naturally” slim people don’t have a sweet tooth and just have naturally good portion control/fullness sensors so their “I eat what I want” means they eat the right number of calories without thinking about it.

I think calorie counting is an important part of a some less naturally slim people’s habits as we don’t have the right sensors to monitor our intake otherwise.

Ditto daily weighing- a lot of naturally slim people said they never weigh themselves but that they do cut back or exercise more if their jeans feel tight. However I know that If I don’t with daily then it is very easy to lie to myself about how tight those jeans are, which leads to deciding leaving the top button undo, then deciding not to wear that pair, And boom, I’ve put on 10lbs....

Surely DAILY weighing is unreliable?

Weekly, yes.

I'm not there yet but getting closer by not drinking alcohol, healthy vegan meals and not eating in the evenings. Exercise varies but I'm always pretty active. I just need to stop snacking now - still have crisps and sweet things & without those I'm sure I'd get to my goal!

The truth is you can't eat a lot. Lean protein and lots of steamed veg is what you normally eat. Fruit but not too much as it can bloat you. A sweet treat maybe once a week and it's usually small. Alcohol only occasionally. Never have sweet drinks. I know people will say don't you feel hungry but you really don't. You get used to smaller portions. This is all combined with exercise.

That’s not my experience at all @ambereeree

I really would be starving just eating that.

I don’t like fruit much so I rarely eat it but bloating after eating a banana? Really?

I’d forgotten how batshit mn food threads get.

@Floraflower3

I think a fair few people in this thread could benefit from looking into reverse dieting which is where you gradually increase your daily calories so that you can maintain your weight whilst eating more.

I don't have a problem with reducing down to 1200-1300 when trying to lose weight but I wouldn't stay on those calories forever.

I follow a PT on instagram, yes she's active (only does live HIIT sessions 6x week, no longer than an hour), but she's 5'2 and maintains/ has leaned out on 2000 calories. If you workout effectively with weights (+cardio for fitness) and build more muscle, muscle at rest requires more calories to sustain which means you can also eat more AND you look better than just being skinny as you will have tone. It's also good for strengthening your bones which is important as you age.

How does that work in scientific terms?

@PurpleDaisies I'm not talking about a few pieces of fruit a day. I'm talking about snacking on large portions of fructose loaded fruit because you miss eating sweet things. Everything in moderation I guess.

I think the idea of being naturally a certain size is a bit of a myth.
For example, I'm naturally an 8-10 without much effort but I'm under no illusions that my habits make that easy to maintain.

For example, I don't like fast food very much, I rarely drink alcohol, haven't got a sweet tooth and walk/cycle a lot.

@PablosHoney Walking round the kitchen on strong leg muscles 🤣🤣🤣 I do agree with you by the way alittleprivacy, that part just sounds so funny.

I was deliberately trying to pick something mundane. When I was overweight, simple ever day movements were harder than they should have been. Now I'm not just slim but strong and I find real pleasure in the difference even if I'm doing something boring.

I know what you mean and I agree, it just sounds funny

Apologies for the mega long post but so many comments I wanted to respond to.

OP, you’ll find that people who manage to stay size 8-10 in their 30s and 40s are overwhelmingly “naturally skinny”. They may say how careful they are etc, but really they are not. They do have cake and biscuits and alcohol and they don’t run themselves into the ground with exercise either

Not true. I'm not naturally skinny. After having children I have been overweight for about 15 years. But I've finally manged to do something about it. And although I very occasionally have cake etc. for the vast majority of the time I don't and I do exercise for a minimum 30 minutes pretty much every day and often as much as 2 or 3 hours.

Self discipline is required but after a while it does become habit. The key in my opinion is finding what works for you. So although I don't religiously count calories I'm not going to snipe at those who do. And I do look at new processed items to check the calories in them.

What I think this thread proves is that overweight people are not necessarily gluttonous, greedy individuals. If so many women are surviving off nothing but veg or slimming soups whilst doing huge amounts of exercise to remain a size 8-10...then surely if they started eating three meals a day with carbs and fat, they could easily end up overweight whilst eating what is considered a normal diet.

The overriding take home is that this generation has got used to eating more than it needs. Whether that be three meals a day when two will do, processed and snack foods or fizzy drinks and alcohol, people consume more calories than they burn.

If you're not naturally that size (and most women aren't) then you're pretty much looking at lifelong food deprivation. Personally I think what's the bloody point, but it's up to you.

It becomes a habit and not a hardship. The taste for sugary things reduces. The enjoyment of vegetables increases. I have a huge plate of salad or vegetables with most meals. And because I only have one or two meals a day I can indulge in terms of using butter.
The only hardship for me is avoiding being sucked back into bad habits after a holiday or a restaurant meal. Because I do indulge then so I have to reset a bit afterwards.

salami
Top tip - get reduced fat salami - so low in calories.

I dont need to be a certain weight to feel ok

But I do. Or rather, a certain shape when I look in the mirror. If I'm flabby in the mirror then I will be depressed. At the moment I'm not flabby so I'm happy. And much healthier too. Everything works better. Being a little bit careful with what I eat is a small price to pay.

You can stay slimanddrink alcohol, snack, eat takeaways, processed food etc.

I can't. I have no impulse control. Once the snack is open it all gets eaten.

Surely DAILY weighing is unreliable?

Why unreliable? It's a very quick way of picking up on unwanted weight gain and rectifying immediately. Rather than leaving it a week by when half a stone could have gone on.

I know people will say don't you feel hungry but you really don't. You get used to smaller portions.

This. And then if you overindulge you have to retrain yourself. And then you don't like the discomfort of overeating so you order starters instead of mains in restaurants with mega portions.

@alittleprivacy has it. I'm not quite there yet but I love the exercise I do and look forward to it. And I love feeling fitter, stronger and more toned.