Do many people think that ADHD is not real?

[Ilovecranberries]

Was having remote drinks with a friend and his wife yesterday. She's a secondary school teacher in a quite "rough" school (not in the UK). I was quite surprised when, discussing something quite abstract about how different people think and react differently, she had said quite breezily that the majority of teachers she knows "don't believe" in the existence of ADHD.
Incidentally, one of my children is currently being assessed for it, but it is not news that I had shared socially outside of my immediate family. I wasn't offended, but I wonder if it is actually a widespread view behind the closed doors?

I can’t say it’s not real but I do think a lot of children don’t have it when their parents say they do. My friend is the same, apparently both her girls have it and she’s saying my two have it and should be assessed. It frustrates me.

I can’t say it’s not real but I do think a lot of children don’t have it when their parents say they do.

You're quite right, you can't say it's not real. That's because it's a clinically recognized condition. There is no 'believing' in it, we are not talking about the tooth fairy or Father Christmas.

I agree however that people bandy the term around, without really having a clue. They do it with OCD too. Funnily they don't do it with the other neurological conditions that can often be co-morbid alongside ADHD. People will casually say 'I'm a bit OCD' but they won't say 'I'm a bit Tourettes'.

@wagtailred

SoVeryLost - its not a parents job to think of a bigger picture. If a parent doesnt advocate for their own child then who will? I absolutely appreciate the challenges - but just because it is difficult, challenging or impossible to mitigate it doesnt mean it isnt the cause of the issue. My child with ASD had a number of huge meltdowns when the child with ADHD just couldnt stop themselves poking him with a board pen during carpet time! That it was challenging for the teacher i dont dispute. But for the teacher to suggest the issue was i needed more boundaries at home as the cause of a meltdown was offensive.

I don’t disagree hence why I used the word advocate and not another more negative word however, some parents don’t want to understand that it simple isn’t possible for a teacher to be everything to everyone. Like I said there are between 15-30 children in a class. All of those children require individual care/attention. As much as I’d love to cater for all of them it’s simply not possible.

I think it genuinely exists but I also think people have been quick to label children with that rather than deal with their behavioural issues/parental issues.

@wagtailred your example is an ineffective teacher. You don’t sit the child who has a tendency to poke anywhere near a child who can’t cope with it.

Sadly it normally means that the same child who can cope with the distractions with minimal affect on the their learning is always say with the distracting child.

@Fimofriend

Did your parents' friends' child have any other symptoms apart from 'climbing the walls'? Perhaps a food intolerance can cause hyperactivity in some children. But what about all the other symptoms of ADHD? Lack of focus. Fidgeting. Forgetfulness. Lack of organisational skills. Procrastination. Impatience. Interrupting others. Daydreaming. Problems multitasking. Feeling so full up with 'stuff' that one more request might send you over the edge. Finding all the everyday stuff others do easily a very real challenge .... etc. etc. I could go on.

That is a little bit of what ADHD is. It's not the same as a food intolerance. And many, many children are not medicated. Their symptoms are managed in other ways. I honestly don't think that the medical experts who committed their professional lives to researching ADHD are terribly interested in the profits of a pharmaceutical company.

I do find it a bit suspicious that the symptoms for ADHD are mostly the same as for food intolerances.

Really?

Do food intolerances make it difficult for people to focus? Concentrate? Listen while writing? Write while listening? Break large projects into smaller chunks? Remember more than 3 things at once? Struggle to process information? Organise? Prioritise? Manage time effectively? Multitask effectively? Plan effectively? Tolerate frustration?

Cross-posted with AhBallix...

I got the food intolerances thing from well-meaning but misguided friends when DS was diagnosed with ASD. Apparently ASD was/is vastly overdiagnosed and often presents in the same way as food intolerances (seeing a pattern here?), the way to 'cure' all of his "ASD tendencies" is to completely cut out processed food, enforce a protein-heavy diet with zero refined carbs and zero processed sugar. This is for the child with a diet so restricted that, at that time, he only had six acceptable foods that he would tolerate eating.

People don't half chat shite when it comes to neurological differences.

DD and I both have food intolerances.

Yet oddly no one has sent us to psychologists, written 28 page reports on our learning issues and suggested strategies for coping, worked with a multidisciplinary team at school to write a 504 plan for what accommodations we'll need to be able to get an education...

We do both take medication for our food intolerances though. Bloody pharma, eh?

@SoVeryLost all those children don't need individual care and attention in the same way that my DS needs a 1:1 in class. My DD doesn't, for example, she does benefit from some small group work but it would be daft for me to suggest that she should have a full time TA. My DS can't manage school at the moment without one.

@HoldMyLobster

Great minds ....

I believe ADHD is 100% real
Over the years I've worked with many families that have children with this disorder and they have needed support.
I also know many families that claim their child has ADHD and it is down to poor parenting with no rules, boundaries and consequences. The child's behaviour is off the wall.
I have also seen this behaviour reversed either when the parent has been on a parenting course and follows advice or the child has gone into a foster placement and has settled into an age appropriate routine.

This is for the child with a diet so restricted that, at that time, he only had six acceptable foods that he would tolerate eating.

Ha, yeah, DS goes through phases when all he’ll eat are apples and breadsticks. We could try cutting out the breadsticks I guess. If he’s malnourished he might not have the energy to fidget so much 🤷‍♀️

I have taught many children with ADHD and agree with everything that
GnomeOrMistAndIceGuy said. In addition, I have found that children with the condition can be helped by a calm, consistent approach at home and a good link between parents and supportive teaching staff. However, it can sometimes be exacerbated by a chaotic homelife.Having said that, of course it can be very difficult to be calm around children with ADHD, as the demands can be so great, 24/7.

[quote drspouse]@SoVeryLost all those children don't need individual care and attention in the same way that my DS needs a 1:1 in class. My DD doesn't, for example, she does benefit from some small group work but it would be daft for me to suggest that she should have a full time TA. My DS can't manage school at the moment without one.[/quote]
I never said they need the same individual care and attention. I’m saying the exact opposite which is what makes it so impossible to differentiate in the way you want in a full classroom. If I’m expected fully cater for 30 children in 50 minutes please explain how? It’s really not possible to the extent SEN parents often want.
I bet if the teacher didn’t know your DD at all you’d also complain so yes each child does need some individual time and if you have three children in a classroom (I’ve had it happen, or even one and no TA) whose plan require 1:1 time and one TA who do you think misses out? All of the children, especially those who don’t have an individual learning plan.

Oh ffs I had written a lengthy reply and then lost it.

The issue with schools, even really good ones when it comes to SEN is lack of funding in general and sometimes SEN funding in particular (some LEA's have arbitrary rules and application processes which can rival an assessment process in length and difficulty) . Even really good schools can sometimes get children that they cannot cope with. LEAs force them to take children despite concerns about ability to cope with particular needs, or the dynamics in the class or how all the children's wellbeing is affected. Some of these schools are being used as a stop gap on the way to SEN schools and other specialist provisions. In many schools there can be quite a high number of SEN and SEMH issues in each class.

My school for example gets all the children excluded from other schools. We have only excluded one child in 15 years , and that's because of serious safeguarding concerns(think weapons being brought in and hidden).

For every kid we help, we probably fail 3 more. I'm sure there are quite a few parents that are angry and unhappy and thinking we can do more. We probably can, but we do have our limits, that a lot of the time are externally imposed.

@Mrsfrumble at least you weren't approached by the essential oils brigade? Silver linings and all that.

"I'd NEVER buy into Big Pharma by medicating my child in that way!" ... proceeds to spend £££ on essential oils even though alternative 'medicine' is also a billion dollar/pound industry.

To a pp - People do say ‘that’s my Tourette’s’ when they accidentally say something they shouldn’t.

I was out with a friend once - and her friend - a GP said exactly that. ‘Oh my Tourette’s!’

I was so shocked I didn’t reply that two of my kids have Tourette’s (as well as ADHD and OCB).

Medication is a subject I'm slightly conflicted on. I don't mean for the usual judgemental reasons and I don't doubt for many, or even the majority they are a good thing. I've tried them and they do seem to work as intended. But it's just so dull, it's like going from a busy fairground to staring at a sepia still life.

I'm the first to acknowledge that others might not have the same experience of adhd or the opportunity for a lifestyle that on the whole compliments it and I know that some people simply don't enjoy busy fairgrounds, so it's not a criticism or a judgement of anyone that medicates. But I do find it depressing that we live in a world that metaphorically force feeds people 5kg of candy floss and cheap hotdogs, sticks them on the waltzers and waits for the inevitable consequences before they ever get chance to discover whether they like the fair. When actually with a little consideration the person could have an equal experience of both before deciding which they prefer.

@Fimofriend if you think the symptoms of food intolerance are mostly the same then you don't know anything about adhd. Although your comments about bad concentration demonstrate you haven't got a clue. It's as ridiculous as suggesting paracetamol cures chronic irreversible breathing disabilities because they worked on your heavy cold.

I have a son with ASD/ADHD. He's very high functioning, and I've been accused of knowing how to play the system, Munchaussens Syndrome and have come across some extremely unpleasant teachers, who clearly think I'm making it up.
It's highly stressful and believe me I wish it wasn't real

And I will never forget the awful headteacher, who tried to have my son expelled twice, because she didn't want to provide the support that was written into his hard "won" and fought for EHCP.
He is now an Oxbridge prospect. I'd love to give her the finger

if you have three children in a classroom (I’ve had it happen, or even one and no TA) whose plan require 1:1 time and one TA
Then that's illegal.
Providing what's in their EHCP is a legal requirement, not a "nice to have".

@misszola my daughter has autism I very much suspects that she also has adhd. Often a person may have both, alongside other co-morbidities, dyslexia, dyspraxia etc. But adhd is a condition in its own right. Aspergers is no longer diagnosed, my daughter would probably have received that diagnosis, but she received asd diagnosis.