To think that slim people have different habits re food and exercise

[WhatWillSantaBring]

I've been overweight most of my adult life, and find I put on weight very easily. BUT I also think I have had very unhealthy food habits - I think of food as treats, I avoid the scales, I eat when I'm not hungry, I always have the cake, emotional eating etc. I know all the things I do wrong (and that I'm sure a lot of overweight people do) but what I want to know is what do thin people do "right". i.e. what are the habits of people who are consistently a healthy weight (i.e. BMI of 20-25).

I've got some very petite friends who will do things like:

• weigh every day and take immediate action if their weight goes up by more than 5lbs;
• never accept a biscuit
• only drink one glass of wine (unless its a very special occasion when they may have two)
• never order themselves a dessert/ice cream etc (will just eat whatever their kids leave)

- exercise 5-6 days a week without fail, including Christmas Day

• never have seconds

If you're slender, and have maintained a healthy weight for years, what habits do you have that you think help you?

Always been BMI 18-19, though I have a small frame so look slim rather than skinny.

I don't snack. I feel unsatisfied if I do, and it spoils my enjoyment of my next meal.
I feel physically uncomfortable if I eat too much, which naturally restricts portion size.
I don't enjoy a lot of junk food like fizzy drinks (bleurgh), ice cream etc, so it's no hardship to go without. I do have to stay away from the crisps.

It is harder as you get older. At uni I ate a pudding/chocolate bar after lunch and dinner, but I had no car and walked everywhere. I couldn't do that these days. I basically have no sugary food (added sugar, I eat carbs and fruit etc).

My diet is reasonably healthy (I cook from scratch and very rarely have anything processed or convenience), but I don't force down x portions of anything a day. I've always preferred carbs but healthier things e.g. porridge, wholemeal bread and crackers, etc, in small portions.

I don't do any formal exercise but am on my feet a lot with my job.

Takeaways and eating out make me gain weight, so I limit them. Probably I overeat to subconsciously get my money's worth and because they're tasty.

DH was very overweight as a child and young adult. It stemmed from neither of his parents bothering to cook or pay attention to nutrition, being given chocolate bars and ice cream by a doting grandmother, and too much eating out / takeaways. He is now a healthy weight after he learned to cook, reduced eating out to occasional only, and got into better habits around portion size and recognising when he has had enough.

Most of my family and friends would describe me as naturally slim, but as you can see it's not really natural, just an ongoing low-level effort. Not joyless or depressing, just being careful!

@MitziK
I think there’s a lot of truth in that. I really enjoy food and yet am very slim. I don’t deny myself anything. If I was in a cafe, I’d have hot chocolate and cake and really enjoy them. I don’t reward myself or punish myself with food. I don’t feel virtuous or guilty about food. Nice food is to be savoured. It has no moral component to me at all, so I have no hang-ups about it.

My friend does no exercise and eats all sorts of crap, she won't even walk to the corner shop. Yet is still a size 8 In her 50s.......what she does do tho is burn a lot of nervous energy. She's a natural pacer and foot tapper so always on the go. Even watching TV she'll be moving about. I think a lot of slim people are exercising without realising it.

I have BMI of 21. I've never deprived myself of food but the things i always do are: exercise most days - even if it's just a walk, allow myself one snack/pudding per day, eat loads of veg, I also measure out my portions. On days when I do indulge more than usual I cut the snack out the following day.

I can't eat when upset and that takes me to underweight. Usually just low end of healthy range. I can totally understand how some people who go the other way and eat when upset could become overweight easily.

Always been around 8st10 but stopped drinking a few months back (just went off it) and am currently 8st3. Run most days, approx 50k a week, purely because I enjoy it. Eat pretty much what I want for dinner but don't have dessert. Piece of toast with butter and a topping for breakfast. Lunch is crackers and cheese/butter/pickle and a banana or something else relatively small. Tend to snack a little in the evening, just a (large) handful of cashews or a small chocolate bar. Will always grab a snack if o feel hungry. Don't tend to eat cake or biscuits. Weigh most days, just out of habit. Would never go more than 2 or 3lbs up without having a week of watching what I eat. Always enjoy a night out or party/restaurant when the opportunity arises and don't give a monkeys what I consume at these times. Am just sensible the rest of the time, and run a lot.

@daisypond

What you’ve written is basically the philosophy of intuitive eating. I used to be overweight but now follow these principles (sometimes labelled ‘the secrets of slim people’ ) and now I’m in the healthy range.

I’ve reduced portion size, upped exercise and try to eat slowly while tasting everything. But no diets or rules beyond this. I’ve found it surprisingly simple.

I'm tall and slim (definitely not underweight but towards lower end of BMI spectrum). I have to say that a lot of it is genetic.

I've got some very petite friends who will do things like:

• weigh every day and take immediate action if their weight goes up by more than 5lbs;

I definitely don't do this, never have done

• never accept a biscuit

I eat biscuits sometimes but not regularly

• only drink one glass of wine (unless its a very special occasion when they may have two)

I'm very happy with one or two glasses only

• never order themselves a dessert/ice cream etc (will just eat whatever their kids leave)

eat these things occasionally but not daily

• exercise 5-6 days a week without fail, including Christmas Day

I do exercise but not religiously as you describe

• never have seconds

I do sometimes

I think, what I do do, compared to people who are overweight is that I listen to my body and eat if I am actually hungry. I don't really enjoy eating if I am not hungry. I don't eat too much sugar or alcohol but this is for health rather than weight reasons. I eat plenty of fruit and veg (ditto above). I dislike junk food so am not tempted by it at all.

Lots of slim people saying “I just don’t do / like sugary food”

Sugar is the thing

A colleague eats the most amount I have ever seen someone eat, and is a size 8. She eats breakfast and lunch at work, plus an after school snack (we’re teachers) and it’s double what I eat over three meals! We’re talking two or three pain au chocolat for breakfast, a packet of crisps or sausage roll at the children’s break time, a big portion of lunch from home (four or five slices of cold pizza/a huge piece of lasagna/a triple sandwich from the supermarket plus a Wispa or Twirl) and then after school another packet of crisps or chocolate bar. She hates exercise, and manages to sit on her spinny chair most of the day while the children come to her. Honestly, it’s insane. She attributes it to only being 22.

Older slim colleagues are very much in the skip meals, exist off coffee types.

What is normal has changed.

I think this is very true. I am in healthy BMI range (only just at 24 ). I have a picture from 1982 of my mum and her friend and their kids. My mum was considered slim and her friend fairly overweight by the standards of the time. By today's standards my mum looks very skinny (think almost Kate Moss skinny) and her friend looks not that much bigger than I am now. Us kids in the picture are all really slender.

I'm petite. I'm 5'0 and wear size 8 clothes, but am more comfortable in my skin in a 6. I'm about half a stone over my preferred weight at the moment, but I'm working to lose that.

I also put on weight really easily. In the last year, I've put on a stone, so I changed my habits back to my healthy habits and now I've lost half of it again.

weigh every day and take immediate action if their weight goes up by more than 5lbs;

An additional 5lbs is a lot when you're really tiny! I only weigh weekly though as I'm following Slimming World, so I weigh on group day. It's not a healthy mindset to weigh daily.

• never accept a biscuit

Bollocks to that. Though biscuits are my downfall so I generally only eat two at most otherwise I'll eat the pack.

• only drink one glass of wine (unless its a very special occasion when they may have two)

I don't drink often anyway, and amaretto is my liqueur of choice. But I will drink it if I fancy it, but generally just one. I put it with diet lemonade and make it a tall drink to last me. Much more and I'm pissed anyway

• never order themselves a dessert/ice cream etc (will just eat whatever their kids leave)

My kids don't leave any! I like dessert. I like something sweet after my meal. But I've found that mini servings gives me the sweetness I'm craving, without that car-sick feeling you get when you've piled dessert on top of a big meal. Something like a rich brownie bite. Pizza Express do something similar. You get a coffee and mini desert and it's just the right size. When I'm eating unhealthily, I could put away a family sized trifle in one sitting. And then feel so sick.

• exercise 5-6 days a week without fail, including Christmas Day

Define exercise. Pre-lockdown I'd go to the gym 2-3 times a week and run a few times a week too. But I have two DC under 10 that I also go on walks and bike rides with. Today we went to our local woods. I climbed trees with them and we walked about two miles in total, not much really, but still exercise.

• never have seconds

If I'm hungry, I'll have it, if I'm not, I won't.

I listen to my body and try to decide if I'm eating it because I'm hungry, bored or its just there.

I've changed my snacking habits. We buy a massive tub of Skyr fat free yogurt (the fat free bit is important) and if I'm snaffling around the cupboards looking for a snack, I'll cut up some fruit and top it with that yogurt. Despite my small stature, I have a massive appetite so it's generally a whole banana,whole apple, strawberries, grapes, kiwi, any fruit we've got really. My husband is 6'2 and I have we have the same portion sizes. It's what you're putting on your plate that's important.

I make my own chips and oven cook them, no oil. Just cut them into chip shape and put them in the oven, they're lovely. Even my DC prefer them. I never eat oven chips. I'm vegetarian, and I eat a lot of veg, in various forms. I don't add oil to anything. That was a revelation. I used to drown my cooking in oil and it was so greasy. I love carbs. But I limit my bread intake (another weakness of mine), but I do eat lots of pasta. Usually with salad or a tomato based sauce.

A cheap and healthy way to help change food habits is to drinks lots of water, it does help you feel full between meals.

I'm full after a lettuce leaf !

Also, I never force myself to clear my plate, if I've had enough I stop eating. Was never forced to clear my plate as a child and have never forced my children to clear their plates either. Brought up that when you help yourself start with a small portion and have more if you want it when you've eaten what you have.

I don't think it's a good idea to wait until you're hungry before preparing a meal as you'll then grab the fastest thing possible.

Not in my case or in any of the slim/healthy weight people I know.

This is all really interesting- it seems that activity is the key for many (not exercise). Thank you all!

This is yet another MN thread that perpetuates the myth that anyone who is slim practically starves themselves* this is actually the opposite of the point of my thread which was to find out what slim people think they do, not what society might perceive they do. I wanted to know what it is because starving myself doesn’t appeal, so want some habits to adopt - for some it’s genetics, for many it’s fidgetyness, for others it’s good portion control. But those will not come naturally to me, so I’ll have to learn them.

@WhatWouldYouDoWhatWouldJesusDo

My friend does no exercise and eats all sorts of crap, she won't even walk to the corner shop. Yet is still a size 8 In her 50s.......what she does do tho is burn a lot of nervous energy. She's a natural pacer and foot tapper so always on the go. Even watching TV she'll be moving about. I think a lot of slim people are exercising without realising it.

I always walk around when I am on the phone!

Always been 8 stone something (except when pregnant).

I don’t have scales - but I wear fairly fitted clothes, so it’s pretty obvious when they start to be tight.

I don’t refuse a biscuit or pudding when out or at someone’s house - but I don’t generally bake or buy biscuits or make puddings, so I don’t have them at home. During lockdown this has changed and I have definitely put on weight as a consequence.

I don’t exercise much - but I don’t like driving so I walk everywhere, fast. I am also a fidgeter.

I don’t limit myself to one or two glasses of wine on a night out - but on the other hand whole weeks can go by with me barely drinking.

I don’t calorie count or deny myself any particular food - but I don’t eat breakfast and only have a small lunch. That way I can pick at the kids’ tea (inevitable I find!
) and have a proper dinner without over eating.

I have PCOS and underactive thyroid so hormones are against me when it comes to weight gain. Eating high protein, high fat, low carb works really well for me. Luckily I love cheese and salami so am happy to treat myself with those rather than sweet things.

My suggestion is: work out the things you find particularly difficult to resist and allow yourself those. But cut out something else instead. So if you always pick at the kids’ tea, ok but reduce your dinner or lunch to compensate. If you absolutely adore a few biscuits at 4pm, ok, but have no carbs at dinner. If you hate going to the gym, fine, but make sure you walk everywhere instead. If you love to drink wine every day, cut out snacks instead. Etc.

Also the less sugar you eat the less you want.

I'm in my 50s and have been around 9 stone for the last 30+ years at 5 foot 8. I don't own scales though, so who knows (but always in 10/12 size clothes). I drink most evenings, snack all the time and love my food but I think the main reasons for maintaining a healthy weight are:

• being vegetarian, loads of salads, veg etc, although I don't go a day without either pasta, potatoes or bread
• grazing, I eat little and often throughout the day
• stopping when full. If I have a pizza, I'll always save a couple of slices for the next day because I know I'll love it up to 4/6 slices but don't need the other two right now
• being lucky to not have a sweet tooth, although nuts, crisps, crackers, cheese are probably just as bad as sweet stuff and I will eat at least one of those every day
• don't drink fizzy drinks, just tea, juices, mostly water (but lots of wine)

I honestly think that grazing is the key, eat when you're hungry, have a little of everything that you enjoy but stop before you feel full. In half an hour if you're still hungry, you can always eat again (but you probably won't need to).

I feel like the world needs another series of super size vs super skinny

I was a thin ‘eat anything’ 20 year old and I slowly crept up to about two stone overweight by the time I hit 30.

For the last two/three years I’ve gotten it under control and down to a healthy BMI but I do have to pay attention to my weight and food habits because I love eating.

Sometimes I say yes to the biscuit, sometimes I say no. Depends on what I’ve eaten lately, how active I’ve been, whether it’s my favourite type of biscuit or a mediocre one.

I exercise daily, I have trained myself to enjoy running and cycling. I used to hate it, but now I love it. I also walk as much as possible and always take the stairs.

I eat healthy, home cooked meals and I portion control, whereas before I would fill up my plate and clear it whether I was hungry or not. I generally avoid snacking.

I don’t drink often, drinking in the house doesn’t excite me, but I like a few cocktails when out. I avoid all other sugary drinks, only drinking tea, coffee and water most of the time.

I had to train myself to not eat crisps and choc and not always automatically order the burger and chips. Now I’m used to it, it doesn’t bother me. Often the idea of these foods are more exciting than the actual experience, if I really want some, I will portion control and have it. Often just a taste is actually enough. I really do prefer feeling fit, healthy and properly fuelled for exercise so I don’t find it to be a joyless existence.

I eat a lot of veg. I actively enjoy eating salad and with eat any vegetable apart from fennel. Not much fruit though - I'm quite fussy with that.
I don't eat out of politeness. If I don't want something I'll quite happily say 'no thanks'.
I also have to be comfortable when eating and don't like eating in public when I'm by myself. So won't eat on public transport, walking down the street etc. Have be doing something like working on the computer/reading if having lunch at work. I've put on a few pounds during lockdown because I've been at home most of the time and have been more comfortable around food so have eaten more. I've started to address this before it gets out of control - I'm still in the 'normal' weight range but feel big for me.
I like exercise - not just the feeling afterwards but the activity itself.
I only buy pringles at Christmas because I know I can easily eat a whole tube to myself. I'm much less likely to snack on small packet crisps because I wouldn't eat them absent mindedly while making tea like I would with an open packet of sharing crisps.
I will have one or two biscuits but can stop at that.
I actively dislike eating if I'm not hungry to start with. I can also cope with feeling hungry for a while before having to eat something.

@fairlyplump

I'm full after a lettuce leaf !

A whole leaf? Goodness me, I can't even manage half. Of course, I do allow myself to sniff one square of good quality (none of that Green & Blacks rubbish) dark chocolate on a bimonthly basis.

I don't weight myself as I don't have any scales, they broke a few years ago. But I eat what I want quite a lot of crap but I don't eat huge amounts. I also walk everywhere.