To be worried about my niece

[Eolhc1990]

My sister has a 12 week old baby girl. For some reason she has decided to ignore all health advice and start her on solid food at this early age. Health advice says to wait until 6 months. This baby cannot hold her head steady or sit up yet. I think the only reason she is starting her on solids is so that she will sleep for longer.
I have read about the risks of weaning too early but I don't know whether I should Express my concerns to my sister. I think she will take it as a criticism and tell me to mind my own business.
Have any of you mums weaned this early and the child has been fine?

especially if its so*

There's no harm in voicing your concerns. However are you certain she isn't following advice given to her by medical professionals? My dd was underweight and aged 3 month it was recommended to me that we could start giving her baby food to try and up her calories.

I had DC1 in 2001 and it was 16 weeks but we waited until 20 but by the time I had DC2/3 it was six months.

I am pretty sure feeding a 12 week old solids is almost always a stupid idea and won't help the mum get more sleep.

"Get her told"

It's not OPs child, she has no say. She can express her concerns to her sister but her sister can tell her where to stick them.

I thought things like baby rice were empty calories, they don't get any goodness from them and in fact you are taking away goodness from extra milk they would drink if you fill them up on food they can't digest properly.

I was living in another European country when my DS was born 2 years ago. My health visitor was all for me starting food at 3 months even although I kept reminding her that British guidelines were 6 months plus. They also recommend duvets and pillows for newborns, so.... what to believe.

Advice changes all the time. 20 years ago, you had to wait until 4 months to wean. If you did at 8 weeks you were deemed to be a dreaful mother. Now it's 6 months and if you do it at 3, you're a terrible mother.

I weaned my DS at 2 months with just basic rice under the recommendations of the health visitor. He was about baby. He's now an adult, very healthy, no allergies and never overweight.

Leave her to it, it's her decision as she sees fit.

Stupid.

There's a reason the guidelines are there.

A baby that young doesn't have a digestive system that can cope with anything other than milk.

Honestly there should be a licence to have kids these days.

My kids were weaned at 4 months, myself and my siblings at 3 and we have not one food allergy between us. Unless it's wanton neglect or abuse, how your sister raises her child is really none of your business.

"Do the best you can, until you know better. When you know better, do better"

There's plenty of advice out there for your sister to be able to do better. Hopefully she is just doing her best, and doesn't know the guidelines. It wouldn't be unreasonable of you to bring this up with her in the hope that when she realises the reasons weaning is best left til 6m she can take that on board.

Thanks to everyone for your advice. To answer some of the questions asked

• I do have a child myself but my baby is only 8 wks old so I'm not an experienced "mum"
• my sister formula feeds her baby. She's a thriving little girl hitting all her milestones up until this point.
• no she definitely wasn't advised by a healthcare provider because she specifically told me she is ignoring the health advice... (but she believes the health advice is incorrect.,)

Im relieved to hear that plenty of ppl have been weaned early and are perfectly healthy. I won't give my opinion to my sister unless she asks. She will know my viewpoint in a few wks when my baby hits the 3 month mark because I will certainly be waiting until 6 mths.

Please just follow the guidelines yourself. Yes lots of people weaned early and we’re fine, but we know better now, so we do better with the knowledge we have.

My mum pretty much had rusks in her bottle from birth.
I was weaned at 6 weeks in the early seventies.
I think it was 12 weeks in the nineties.
Ds1 was weaned at 16 weeks.
I think we’d be foolish to believe that the advice now isn’t going to change again in the future.

MIL suggested we gave DS rusks with his when he was about 6 weeks old. DH did ask how we were meant to do this when I was BF. Supposedly she gave DH them in his bottle when he was that age in the evening so he slept through. She had to make the hole in the teat bigger. So not only did she reduce the milk feeds she gave to replace them with something non nutritious (as gut not developed enough to digest properly) and full of sugar but also increased the risk of choking.

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland

I know a nephew of mine was given baby cereal at around 10 weeks - he was a very hungry baby and even 2 full bottles of formula didn’t properly satisfy him.

This sounds like bollocks since milk usually has more calories than weaning foods. What it will do is clog a babies digestive tract as its slower to digest, meaning they might request food less frequently. It doesnt mean they are "satisfied". It might mean they are effectively constipated

I’d be a little bit more respectful of someone’s evidence than to call it ‘ bollocks.’

My own son wasn’t thriving on the breast and by three weeks was sent to hospital straight ffrom her surgery.
He was in hospital for nearly two days and managed to accept formula ( much to my disappointment.)
He was discharged and I was told that my milk wasn’t good enough but to persist with it prior to a formula feed.
We muddled through to about 11 weeks and my GP told me to dismiss the HVs and to think about introducing solids in... shock , horror.. puréed form.
My son is fine now and has just finished uni.

Not all babies are ready at six months. Some are earlier and some might be later.

BLW is very tight on its timescale. All babies are different.
And yes , my daughter was hospitalised after choking on cheese at eight months. So I know what choking til your blue and then go limp looks like.
I feel that BLW is a fad.

Weaned at 16 weeks following paediatricians advice.

Is she maybe doing the same?

My twins are now 3.5, and I started them on "solids" at 4 months (it was baby rice, not very solid if you ask me!)
One of them took to it like a duck to water, and never looked back. The other wasn't into it, and was more like 5.5-6 months before he was interested.

@Iloveyoutothefridgeandback

Is there any reason why you can't tell your sister to not be a twat and to stop harming her baby?

You sound ridiculous. Calm down.

Easy tiger 😂😂

Both mine were fed around 10wks maximum, then under health visitor advice.

Both big babies, breast fed constantly. It got to the point my youngest would bite my nipple and twist his head and scream towards the end of a feed as he still wasn't satiated. And I produced a lot of milk!

The weaning was very minimal, and involved a tiny bit of rusk, mixed with breast-milk on the tip of my finger, or a little spoon. By 5 mths, they were definitely eating all of the same home cooked food we did, alongside milk.

Both are now 15 and 20, and are still very much foodies! Eldest very slim and sporty, youngest a couple of stone overweight. He is however 6ft and has definitely put on some in lockdown. I don't however blame this on a bit of rusk early.

Both times though, we had different advice on weaning, especially as my first was 20yrs ago!

Mine were born in early 90s .they were weaned at about 12weeks my health visitor said it was fine. Things change. But I'm sure your niece will be ok

@1Morewineplease

Wow that's terrifying. I'm preparing to start blw and that's scared me quite a bit. Had your dd been on purées etc before or had she always been eating solids from the start of weaning? Do you have advice you can share in retrospect?

I would have waited till 6 months to do BLW but my LO took a bite of my food out of my hand at 51/2 months .... in a split second I turned away from my food - turned back to have another bite - she was on it!

If she's doing it because the sleep is so bad - is there anyway family can help her get a rest whilst looking after the baby, esp if you're gonna question her decision.

My daughter is 20 so it’s years since I was weaning a baby. It used to be done at 12 weeks, starting with baby rice. Please could someone tell me why it’s changed to six months. It’s a genuine question.

My oldest was on 3 proper meals w day by the time he started nursery at 5.5 months ( back when mat leave was shorter). He’s have cereal and fruit for breakfast, shepherds pie for lunch etc. And admittedly quite a few jars as well. He only had milk morning and night by then. He’s now tall slim and healthy.
My friend who is a speech therapist says that late weaning can affect speech. Honestly I suspect the weaning age is going to become more flexible by the time we have grandchildren.