Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

School will be closed at lunchtime one day a week from Sept

708 replies

Ilovecranberries · 14/07/2020 09:25

The school (primary) had just informed the parents that they will be closing at lunchtime on one day a week from September to facilitate "planning".
I don't even know what to say. AIBU to think it is ridiculous? I am a single working parent, not sure how I am supposed to work around this. Extra childcare for these 3.5 hours at the local childminders rates will be £56 a week (two children here). Or two grand a year post tax. I probably will be told I am BU (I probably am), just very anxious right now.

OP posts:
Evelefteden · 14/07/2020 17:41

@LaurieMarlow

you know you can make arrangements with one or 2 families not half the class?

But then you’re scheduled to mind every second or third week. That’s not worth anyone’s while if they’re having to use holiday.

For it to be helpful to the OP she needs more families involved. And you need to cater for siblings. So it becomes unmanageable really quickly.

You need to think this stuff through you see Wink

Janice has got people climbing over her to watch her kids. She is soooooooo lucky. Gosh why can’t we be all like Janice...
LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 17:44

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

thebirthlyhallows · 14/07/2020 17:45

@Ilovecranberries

Kids are expensive, shocking. Did you just realise this? No, I am an imbecile who was paying around £2.5K / month in childcare for a few years and finally hoped that those times are over.
Sorry OP but I actually lolled at this.

I just wanted to say I think you're doing a great job holding it all together by yourself.

I have just come through the expensive childcare years myself and am looking forward to the light at the end of the tunnel that is full time schooling come September😬

Evelefteden · 14/07/2020 17:45

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SandieCheeks · 14/07/2020 17:45

@Ilovecranberries

It's only childminding if it's paid for. I think there was a case of two female police officers looking after each other's children whilst working opposite shifts - caught for illegal childminding. Benefit in kind also counts as "payment".
Yes, and after that case the rules were clarified so childcare swaps didn't count. Payment is "money, goods or services" not reciprocal childcare.
Evelefteden · 14/07/2020 17:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

drspouse · 14/07/2020 17:47

Why would anyone not plan for this? It’s been a legal requirement for children to do this (unless homeschooling) until this crisis.

People like @JaniceWebster (TBF I think it's only her) have taken into account a few days when school is not open.
They have assumed that their friends/relatives who do not work will care for their children on multiple occasions.
But I bet they didn't factor in full time paid childcare for all those years till their child was 18.

LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 17:47

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 17:49

But I bet they didn't factor in full time paid childcare for all those years till their child was 18.

I’m sure Janice has a plan. She’ll just drop them with the next door neighbour for 18 years. Such a treasure.

drspouse · 14/07/2020 17:51

I’m sure Janice has a plan.
And then she'll berate the rest of us for not thinking of it first!

Evelefteden · 14/07/2020 17:52

@LaurieMarlow

But I bet they didn't factor in full time paid childcare for all those years till their child was 18.

I’m sure Janice has a plan. She’ll just drop them with the next door neighbour for 18 years. Such a treasure.

Grin
Ilovecranberries · 14/07/2020 17:55

Well, @JaniceWebster - you are a much braver (and probably better) person than me then. And surrounded by lovely people as well. The idea of being responsible for someone else's children on regular basis fills me with dread, to be honest.

OP posts:
VanillaFrais · 14/07/2020 17:58

@ARoseInHarlem

Children are required to receive an education. If parents don’t want to home school (to a govt set standard) and can’t afford private school, society will pay for your children to receive a basic education. Society will fund this basic education until 16.

As families’ abilities to support their lifestyles (not suggesting any level of extravagance, literally mean a style of living: home ownership ideally, some form of private transport ideally, one or more children ideally, a certain level of consumption ideally, a certain amount and time of leisure time ideally) on a single salary decreased, the “problem” of what to do with children increased. Couple this with a long overdue push for equality for women without a counter-balancing responsibility on men to fulfil their duties, and conditions are ripe for financial and social disaster.

Over the years schools and teachers have taken on increasing roles for things that used to be covered by the nuclear family, extended family, local communities, local government and state agencies.

With just one extraneous happening - a pandemic, not even a natural disaster or a war - a system pushed to its limits cracks. Responsibilities fall back onto families.

Which, in my opinion, is where responsibility for children belongs.

This. So much responsibility, expectation and, ultimately, blame heaped onto schools.
VanillaFrais · 14/07/2020 17:58

@ARoseInHarlem

Children are required to receive an education. If parents don’t want to home school (to a govt set standard) and can’t afford private school, society will pay for your children to receive a basic education. Society will fund this basic education until 16.

As families’ abilities to support their lifestyles (not suggesting any level of extravagance, literally mean a style of living: home ownership ideally, some form of private transport ideally, one or more children ideally, a certain level of consumption ideally, a certain amount and time of leisure time ideally) on a single salary decreased, the “problem” of what to do with children increased. Couple this with a long overdue push for equality for women without a counter-balancing responsibility on men to fulfil their duties, and conditions are ripe for financial and social disaster.

Over the years schools and teachers have taken on increasing roles for things that used to be covered by the nuclear family, extended family, local communities, local government and state agencies.

With just one extraneous happening - a pandemic, not even a natural disaster or a war - a system pushed to its limits cracks. Responsibilities fall back onto families.

Which, in my opinion, is where responsibility for children belongs.

This. So much responsibility, expectation and, ultimately, blame heaped onto schools.
LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 18:07

This. So much responsibility, expectation and, ultimately, blame heaped onto schools.

What about the responsibility and expectation on single parents like the OP though?

She’s expected to provide for her children by working full time. Then during lockdown continue to work full time while educating them. Now getting back to working her normal hours in the office while somehow covering hours the school now isn’t doing. She’s facing performance review because she hasn’t been able to focus fully during school closures.

She pays her taxes, has paid plenty of early childcare dues. Doesn’t she deserve to be supported in providing for her children?

VanillaFrais · 14/07/2020 18:28

@LaurieMarlow

This. So much responsibility, expectation and, ultimately, blame heaped onto schools.

What about the responsibility and expectation on single parents like the OP though?

She’s expected to provide for her children by working full time. Then during lockdown continue to work full time while educating them. Now getting back to working her normal hours in the office while somehow covering hours the school now isn’t doing. She’s facing performance review because she hasn’t been able to focus fully during school closures.

She pays her taxes, has paid plenty of early childcare dues. Doesn’t she deserve to be supported in providing for her children?

But this is what I don't understand. People can see the system doesn't work in so many ways, for children, for parents, for teachers etc yet instead of blaming the government and campaigning as a joint force with teaching unions for change and proper funding, people seem to only look as far as the school to blame. I have nothing but absolute sympathy for the OP and others in her situation but I am also massively frustrated that individual schools are being blamed for something that is very much out of their control. Teachers have taken strike action in the past because of the way education and funding were being destroyed (and which ultimately affects the children's quality of education) but parents were not supportive of strike action (as a last resort) because it was inconvenient. Now it's all come home to roost and it's become apparent that state schools are struggling even further...and yet the penny still hasn't dropped.

This situation is only going to get harder in time. As parents and/or teachers we need to stand together as a group and demand better. Parents and schools pitted against each other is what the government wants.

JaniceWebster · 14/07/2020 18:40

Evelefteden
Janice has got people climbing over her to watch her kids. She is soooooooo lucky. Gosh why can’t we be all like Janice...

very mature and clever, said with a tinkly laugh and a head tilt I expect?

Some of us make arrangements and help out each other, why does it strike such a nerve with you?

The playground bullying on this thread is pathetic. Does it help you to insult and gang on someone? Yes, I am making arrangements with friends and neighbours so we can cope as we cannot afford not to work.

The alternative is to wait for someone to magically sort out childcare, good luck with that, you come back and tell us how it's working out for you. With your charming attitude, I can guess how it's going to go....

LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 18:44

I don’t think anyone is laying the blame at the doors of the school solely though. Or at least on this thread. I for one am well aware what a shower of cunts the government are.

However, some schools haven’t necessarily covered themselves in glory during this crisis. Some have provided exceptionally well. And that discrepancy looks to be continuing as they open up. That leads people to believe that the schools have their part to play here too.

Most people don’t have the time or energy to figure out the roles both sides have played as the crisis unfolded. They just want a school system that fricking works. Frustration will be expressed.

In the OP’s case, the school probably needs to clearly demonstrate it has exhausted all other possibilities before taking this decision. Communication is key. Schools can get parents on side if they play it right. In many cases they haven’t bothered.

JaniceWebster · 14/07/2020 18:45

Ilovecranberries
Well, @JaniceWebster - you are a much braver (and probably better) person than me then. And surrounded by lovely people as well.

It's not bravery at all, it's lack of choice. The trains have been completely screwed at the beginning of the year too, making things worst, I have to put my kids somewhere, and so do other people who have the same problems. Childminders might be flexible about very late pick-up, schools and preschools are not.

No point discussing alternative plans we are making on MN, I'd be abused even more!

I am not goady when I talk about swapping, unless you pay a nanny, what else can you do.

LaurieMarlow · 14/07/2020 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

JaniceWebster · 14/07/2020 18:52

VanillaFrais

I could not agree more. I think it's time for people to realise that "if you voted Tory it's your fault" and wash their hand of the problem is not helpful and a bit simplistic. September looks grim, but we do need massive changes in the long term anyway.

FrippEnos · 14/07/2020 18:54

Atadaddicted
State - many of the teachers didn’t want to return

Do you actually believe this drivel or are you just being goady?

Evelefteden · 14/07/2020 18:58

The playground bullying on this thread is pathetic. Does it help you to insult and gang on someone? Yes, I am making arrangements with friends and neighbours so we can cope as we cannot afford not to work

And neither can we. That’s the whole point of the thread Janice one that you can not grasp.

However your really lucky to have that support. Others don’t. My child care support is sheilding. My friends are working and having their own issues with child care. Tbh I don’t even know any SAHM I can take the can take the piss with and ask them to watch my kids long term.

The alternative is to wait for someone to magically sort out childcare, good luck with that, you come back and tell us how it's working out for you. With your charming attitude, I can guess how it's going to go....

Who’s us? I think you will find you in the minority on this thread. Most people here can empathise and are in the same situation. There will be no magic answer if there is no suitable long term child care arrangements. Women will end up dropping hours or leaving work.

It’s really odd that you can’t grasp that. 🥴

VanillaFrais · 14/07/2020 19:09

Well if people can't be bothered to actually find out what the issue is and try and do something about it then don't expect it to get any better @LaurieMarlow

I have nothing but sympathy for anyone struggling at the moment but nothing will change other than for the worse when people continue to turn a blind eye to the actual problem.

VanillaFrais · 14/07/2020 19:09

Well if people can't be bothered to actually find out what the issue is and try and do something about it then don't expect it to get any better @LaurieMarlow

I have nothing but sympathy for anyone struggling at the moment but nothing will change other than for the worse when people continue to turn a blind eye to the actual problem.