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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Face masks. To feel that we have all been through enough....

999 replies

NiknicK · 14/07/2020 04:40

And shouldn’t have to wear face masks if we don’t want to. I know it’s not officially been confirmed yet, but it’s expected to be today, and I don’t get it. If face masks truly help prevent the spreading of the virus, then why on earth wasn’t it made compulsory at the beginning of this pandemic, why now? I know you’ll all likely call me selfish but I can’t do it. I have to wear a mask for ten minutes once or twice month to collect mine and dh’s medication and I find it unbearable even for that small amount of time. They make my face itch and make me want to touch my face more, I can’t breathe properly and get panicky, they slide up as they’re too big for my face and hit my eye lids. My ds is autistic and I suspect I have some traits eg sensory issues, and the thought of having to wear these masks when I find shopping stressful enough as it is, fills me with dread. AIBU?

OP posts:
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Poetryinaction · 14/07/2020 08:21

How long is this going to go on for I wonder? I don't wear gloves, scarves, high neck tops, jewellery etc as they feel too restrictive.
I struggle with goggles for swimming and although I've needed glasses all my life, I take them off constantly to give me a break. I don't wear my hair down as I can't stand things near my face.
I will have to avoid shops. But for how long I wonder?

ZombieLizzieBennet · 14/07/2020 08:23

@Isthisfinallyit

*How am I being selfish if I refuse to go into a shop? Because that’s what I’ll have to do because I’m not wearing a mask. I just don’t like the fact I have to do this.*

You poor person, how sad, having to do something you don't wanna.

Its still all about you.

This is a bizarre criticism of the OP. I don't agree with her AIBU, but everyone who's in a position to decide will be making a choice whether they want to go into a shop masked or avoid them so as not to wear one. That's the nature of the situation. Her decision isn't any more or less selfish than people who make a different one. It would be just the same if she'd been dying to get back onto the high street but hadn't felt safe to do so until masks were made compulsory.
SoupDragon · 14/07/2020 08:23

YABU.

Do you think they are doing this for fun?

I don't like wearing a mask but I suspect Covid would be less fun.

NameChange84 · 14/07/2020 08:24

This virus kills very elderly frail people.

Not all of the time. What about 41 year old fit as a fiddle Broadway Star Nick Cordero? Kate Garraway’s husband is still in a coma. In my hometown, healthy carers and NHS workers as young as their twenties died of it. I’m 36 and have been told by my Cardiologist and GP that I’d be unlikely to survive it due to cardiovascular problems and previous damage from two bouts of pneumonia - I’m otherwise fit, healthy, not at all disabled. Picture of health to look at. Babies have died of this. Ok, statistically few but if it was my baby statistics would mean fuck all.

Covid does and has killed healthy non elderly people too.

SoupDragon · 14/07/2020 08:24

we're making ourselves look ridiculous by whining about this so much

This!!

jessycake · 14/07/2020 08:25

I haven't had a bad case of coronavirus , nor have I spent a long day stuck wearing PPE , or lost anyone directly to coronavirus . I hate masks , but I think I can manage a minor inconvenience for the greater good of everyone .

Charleyhorses · 14/07/2020 08:25

I think that when the govt started to release lockdown they should have implemented it then. And then removed the need further down the line.
I've not felt the need in our local shops/supermarket up to now but about to go back to work on public transport so happy to do so there. I will wear one in shops from today. It's a minor inconvenience to me and most people. That's not to say that I don't think that it's a genuine huge issue for some.

Thesheerrelief · 14/07/2020 08:26

Unfortunately the virus doesn't sense if you've "been through enough" and then leaves you alone. It's still infecting people, still killing people. I agree masks aren't comfortable but if they help to reduce the risk to you and the people you care about then they are worth putting up with.

Greenmarmalade · 14/07/2020 08:28

How about a scarf wrapped around? You could experiment with different options and types of mask. Some are more comfortable than others.

We should have all been wearing them since the outbreak of coronavirus!

SchadenfreudePersonified · 14/07/2020 08:31

Why our government constantly throughout the pandemic has been terribly slow in making crucial decisions I just don’t know I don’t understand the reasoning but it hasn’t benefited anyone

Probably because none of their mates has had a mask factory they can give a contract to.

I expect they've got that sorted now.

(Cynical? Me?)

Bupkis · 14/07/2020 08:32

I think different things are tipping points for people. It has been such a strange and difficult few months, for different reasons for everyone. I can see how for people who find wearing masks uncomfortable or difficult for health or sensory reasons...this could just be the thing that tips you after months of holding stuff together.

why on earth wasn’t it made compulsory at the beginning of this pandemic
Honestly, I think a combination of hindsight, worry over how the public would react (in some countries it is accepted straight away...in others it has led to public demonstrations and near riots) and the fact that the government has pretty much got it wrong, or got it right too late, at every step of the way.

@NiknicK - I hope you find a way to feel safe, whether that be online shopping or finding a mask that you can wear as comfortably as possible. I started a thread asking about which mask to try the other day, and on the whole, people have been really helpful

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/coronavirus/3964953-Which-mask?msgid=98283495#98283495

Good luck

Roussette · 14/07/2020 08:32

We should have all been wearing them since the outbreak of coronavirus!

I have. And I wish we had. It's ridiculous that when COVID was at it's peak it wasn't enforced.

Malbecblooms · 14/07/2020 08:32

There is a lot of drama going on on here. You are a grown adult, if there is even a slight chance it will help protect your self and others you just deal with it and do it.

As a society we seem to have really low resilience.

BelleSausage · 14/07/2020 08:33

Why are the British so precious about this? In New York it is now not socially acceptable to go maskless. South East Asian Countries have managed it for years.

You need to think of it like this- the mask isn’t to protect you, it is to protect everyone else and stop the spread so we don’t have to go back into lockdown (even on a local level).

If you are sick of all the corona restrictions then wear a mask. Then you’ll be able to do all the other things you miss.

It is not a lot to ask.

EmmaGrundyForPM · 14/07/2020 08:33

@Littlecaf

I was really anti masks at first but now I think “I’m an adult, just get over yourself and get on with it”. Makes life much easier to just stop worrying about every single little thing.
^^ This I can't believe the number of people who are declaring they simply cannot wear a mask.

Every frontline healthcare worker, every care worker, many key workers etc are expected to wear them for 8 hour shifts. I'm not aware that a significant number of them refused on the grounds that they can't possibly wear one.

I'm sure most of the people who "can't" wear a mask could manage to keep one on for 40 minutes whilst they did a supermarket shop if they actually tried.

Roussette · 14/07/2020 08:35

You need to think of it like this- the mask isn’t to protect you, it is to protect everyone else

^This.
And yes I will judge if I see anyone in a shop without one on, unless there is a medical reason that a Dr has certified.

Bluegrass · 14/07/2020 08:36

People who don’t wear mask could wear clear plastic face shields. Nothing touches your mouth, no need to panic about not being able to breathe and I’m sure no one in the shops will criticise as it will be obvious that an effort is being made. Job done.

Instead of looking for solutions and compromises some people just seem to enjoy wallowing in problems and Revel in feeling feeling hard done by.

Drivingdownthe101 · 14/07/2020 08:37

@Roussette

You need to think of it like this- the mask isn’t to protect you, it is to protect everyone else

^This.
And yes I will judge if I see anyone in a shop without one on, unless there is a medical reason that a Dr has certified.

How will you know? Will you ask them for their medical reason?
Thisisworsethananticpated · 14/07/2020 08:37

What does having a face mask have to do with the fact we have all ‘been through enough’ ??????

That makes no sense . I’ve been overseas and is not wearing them is really embarrassing

We look stupid , so simple , yet we don’t

bodgeitandscarper · 14/07/2020 08:38

I'm dismayed at the reaction of those who are kicking up a fuss about wearing face masks. Thank god our NHS staff didn't create when they had to eh?
We are behaving like spoilt toddlers, it's embarrassing. I've seen every excuse you can think of listed to avoid using them, from panic attacks, to government control to skin issues.

IF someone has genuine issues they can be exempt, but do people really expect to just carry on as they wish while there are people suffocating and dying terrible deaths because they don't want a few moments discomfort?

So many seemed to want to do their bit at the start of this pandemic, and we've found something that may well slow the spread and allow us all to get back to some semblance of normality, and yet we have people bleating on because they don't want a bit of fabric over their face. Unbelievable.

lynsey91 · 14/07/2020 08:39

Well I haven't missed going to shops at all in the last 4 months and definitely will not be going if I have to wear a mask. If they are so great it should have been brought in earlier but as usual Boris does everything too late.

Lots of people won't want to wear a mask so the shops will continue to be empty

Roussette · 14/07/2020 08:39

How will you know? Will you ask them for their medical reason?

From the 24th I will go to the information desk of the supermarket (if I am in a supermarket) and ask them why someone is not wearing a mask and if they are implementing it strictly.

Bladeofgrass · 14/07/2020 08:39

Until transparent masks are the norm, this is highly discriminatory and disabling to anyone with any degree of hearing loss, and those who need to see mouths to help understand context, expression, meaning etc.

Parker231 · 14/07/2020 08:41

Shops in other mask wearing countries aren’t empty. Some are busier as people feel more protected from other shoppers. Why would England be any different?

CatteStreet · 14/07/2020 08:41

'There is a lot of drama going on on here. You are a grown adult, if there is even a slight chance it will help protect your self and others you just deal with it and do it.

As a society we seem to have really low resilience.'

Reading this in a country where they have been compulsory in shops, on public transport and in other enclosed spaces since the end of April, I can't help agreeing with this. There's some real drama on this thread that I really can't understand.

We're also allowed to wear scarves (loop scarves are good for this) or balaclavas etc (many do this with the head bit pushed down) instead.

Sadly, where I live now people are beginning to cut corners mask-wise and there are always those who think they're far too important/special to obey the law. But I don't recall this sort of mass complaining when this began.