Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask what lockdown has done to your sex life?

32 replies

WildSkitty · 12/07/2020 17:18

DP and I were very naive optimistic at the start of lockdown that we'd be having loads of sex and a pretty nice time together.

The reality is that I'm either working (NHS worker) or trying to homeschool the kids, deal with my DS's ASD meltdowns, planning the next sodding meal that needs cooking, or feeling completely "people'd out". I haven't had more than a couple of hours to myself in the last 4 months and I long for some time alone and to sleep in a bed all by myself.

Needless to say, sex is about the last thing I feel like at the moment. I just feel as though somebody always needs me for something, and I think I'm trying to create space by avoiding sex. I just want to be left alone!

Am I the only one?!

YABU - you are being ridiculous. Our sex life has improved since lockdown.
YANBU - I'm with you. Our sex life has dwindled since lockdown.

OP posts:
Scotsmaw · 12/07/2020 17:52

Sex life???!! What is this thing you speak of!!??

123rd · 12/07/2020 17:58

Teens who go to sleep later than me as they have no school routine to get up for ...and we have never been a 'morning couple' so pretty non existent. It pisses me off
Saying that we are both wfh, and once-literally once -in all this we had started work , had breakfast etc and just had a cheeky shag downstairs. Whilst on company time!!

StarlightLady · 12/07/2020 18:22

Making up for lost time after easing of lockdown restrictions. We don’t all have someone to provide a full service on the premises upon request.

Iamclearlyamug · 12/07/2020 18:30

Lockdown screwed my sex life given my fiancé is abroad and we haven’t seen each other since February 🤦‍♂️🤦‍♂️ Having said that I’ve finally got flights for Wednesday and I’m FULLY intending to make up for lost time 😂😂

Original poster
WildSkitty · 12/07/2020 18:37

Yes I understand that it's totally messed up the sex lives of those who don't live with their partners.

Hope you enjoy your visit @Iamclearlyamug ;)

OP posts:
Realityofsen · 12/07/2020 18:39

My sex life is still "what sex life?!" As it has been for the past 4 years

Missillusioned · 12/07/2020 18:40

As I'm single it has totally killed it.

littlepeas · 12/07/2020 18:44

Virtually none at all! Dc are staying up as late as we are at the moment - eldest ds is still awake in his room when we go to sleep! Youngest ds usually finds his way into our bed at some point during the night too, so he is always there in the morning! There is a child here all day, everyday, so no chance during the day either.

It was easier when the dc were younger - at least they went to bed early!

NamechangeOnceMore · 12/07/2020 18:44

Still having the same amount of sex as before - no more and no less. Both kids are young (not school age) so there hasn't been home schooling to stress us out. Feels like we are getting on pretty well.

sapphire54925 · 12/07/2020 19:02

@namechangeoncemore that sounds like my situation pretty much so nothing really has changed loads for us

MargotMoon · 12/07/2020 22:26

Completely fucking ruined it! Haven't seen my FWB for 4 months. Although maybe it's also an opportunity to draw a line and move on.

EddieVeddersfoxymop · 12/07/2020 22:33

Completely gone now. We are all sick of the sight of each other in my house! I thought we'd have a lovely time with DH home more, me working from home and DD13 with us.
The reality is I've lost my days off where I treasured solitude and silence, DD doesn't have a routine now there's nothing to get up for so she's staying up later and later. Add all this together with the endless noise and if DH so much as waggled a suggestive eyebrow at me I'd snip his balls off with a blunt kitchen knife.

FattyBoom · 12/07/2020 22:36

Killed it. Daughter still in uni town so that's not the issue, it's more the being together 24/7 and the fact that neither of us has made any kind of effort for the past few months (tracksuit bottoms for him, lounge pants and no make up for me) We have no routine, no time for ourselves and have basically been focused on work.

We've binge watched a load of crap tv though

IHaveBrilloHair · 12/07/2020 22:37

I'm shielding and don't live with my Bf.
Its not v active!

tiredanddangerous · 12/07/2020 22:40

Killed it here too. Dh is very stressed due to work and I am well and truly fed up of never having any time to myself.

LimeHookSinker · 12/07/2020 22:41

I’m single. It killed my casual relationship I’d just started. So it has not been good.

Original poster
WildSkitty · 13/07/2020 18:30

@EddieVeddersfoxymop

Completely gone now. We are all sick of the sight of each other in my house! I thought we'd have a lovely time with DH home more, me working from home and DD13 with us. The reality is I've lost my days off where I treasured solitude and silence, DD doesn't have a routine now there's nothing to get up for so she's staying up later and later. Add all this together with the endless noise and if DH so much as waggled a suggestive eyebrow at me I'd snip his balls off with a blunt kitchen knife.
OMG yes the noise! My DS2 just Does. Not. Stop. Talking. It's exhausting!

Sorry that there are so many others with the same issue. I wonder when things will recover?!

OP posts:
Babs709 · 13/07/2020 18:33

Ours went the opposite way at the beginning for sure! All the time. But neither of us was working and the small human in our house still naps a lot in the day. I’d assume it would be the last thing on the minds of folk who suddenly have to homeschool and work from home and had zero help available.

PhoneLock · 13/07/2020 18:33

Absolutely no change at all.

soundsystem · 13/07/2020 19:04

Yep, we're with you I'm afraid. There's very little time without a child talking at us and in the small window between their bedtime and the baby wanting fed again we're eating dinner/flopping down exhausted/catching up on work/chores...

I'm hopeful that in September when the children are out of the house occasionally it might pick up!

soundsystem · 13/07/2020 19:04

Yep, we're with you I'm afraid. There's very little time without a child talking at us and in the small window between their bedtime and the baby wanting fed again we're eating dinner/flopping down exhausted/catching up on work/chores...

I'm hopeful that in September when the children are out of the house occasionally it might pick up!

Rainbow12e · 13/07/2020 19:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Picklypickles · 13/07/2020 19:25

Well its not really possible for us to have sex with the children home, we used to do it when they were at school. I think we managed once near the start of lockdown, back when the kids still slept at night but they don't do that anymore, they're up and down the stairs until the early hours and only go to sleep when I'm in bed. I can't even have a shower without constant visitors let alone anything else!

funnylittlefloozie · 13/07/2020 19:26

Mine's been great. My partner moved into my place when lockdown was announced, so we've been sharing a bed very happily for months. Planning to move in together properly when i can sell this house.

TreacherousPissFlap · 13/07/2020 19:32

For a short while we were more intimate. Once the novelty wore off though we haven't done it for ages. A combination of teen DS approx 6ft away in the other bedroom and being utterly sick of the sight of each other being too busy.

On the plus side, DS is starting to return to clubs, work etc