To think this is unfair to my DD14 (school work)

[PurpleThistles84]

I had a call last night from my daughters teacher to ask why my DS has not joined a google classroom for one of her subjects. Long story short, she had been missed off the invitation email to join the classroom and so she wasn’t aware there was even a classroom on it.

Her teacher confirmed she had been missed off the email invitation but followed it up with ‘she could have asked’ and now expects her to complete any missed work and assignments over the summer holidays.

My DD has really struggled with online learning and has problems with depression (pre lockdown), she is awaiting an assessment from the child mental health services team. She is going to be devastated, as she was so relieved to reach the summer holidays.

This teacher is the same teacher for one of her other classes and acknowledged that she had been doing all her work for that class. I don’t understand what took him nearly 6 weeks to phone me and let me know about this.

My DD moved from S2 to S3 whilst in lockdown and they have only just been given their new timetables despite S3 classes starting online 6 weeks ago. This class is one of the new ones from moving into S3.

She is going to have to do the work as I don’t want her to be behind once school resumes but AIBU to think that this should have been picked up way before now and to feel the teacher is passing the blame onto my daughter a bit? He also said that the children can’t get hold of him by email, only by private comment in the classroom for their class, so I’m not sure how he thinks ‘she could have asked?’

DD isn’t here just now, she is at her fathers so I haven’t had the chance to properly talk to her and find out what’s going on. It’s not impossible that she did notice and did nothing about it, considering the amount of work she was already working through, however I would be quite surprised as she likes to be top in her classes. I suspect she genuinely forgot she had taken it as a subject as it wasn’t her first choice of science subject.

I don’t know how it is out with Scotland but up here the s3’s can choose between three science subjects. Biology, Chemistry and Physics. She chose two of these but one was full so she was given the one she hadn’t chosen.

I won’t show her the email anyways, there is no need for her to know as it will just upset her even more once I break the news that she needs to do this work.

At 14, I would think carefully about delaying telling her. It is her education and she should have the information concerning it so she can feel in control and make a decision, with your support, on how she wants to manage it.

You risk telling her in two weeks time, the weather brightens up later in the holidays, lock down eases, she can get out a bit more and wishes she had the opportunity to do the physics earlier, but couldn't because you, with her best interests at heart, never told her and took that choice away.

You would be withholding information, impacting her trust and taking away her control of her own decisions which doesn't help depression.

I kind of agree with you. Why should she have to suffer for not her fault...

But if everyone else has done it, she has missed on on some part of the syllabus which she needs to do. She'll find at some point that's a problem.
And 6 weeks of lessons, say take 8 hours to catch up, which isn't major over 6 weeks of summer holidays-just over an hour a week.

I'd support her in catching up.

I wouldn't make an issue of this - teacher made an error, daughter didn't realise she was missing classes - all human especially during lockdown. Try and be positive about catching up especially as you said she's had a hard time with her medical condition. Give her some sense of holiday - a week off and then get her to build her work into the day.

She's 14 living in unprecedented times! I don't think she can be criticised for not chasing her teacher. Some university students wouldn't do that, particularly if suffering with their mental health.

It is unfair the teacher said that to you and I'd complain. He should have chased her up after her non attendance the 1st or 2nd time and I'd raise with the school. Explain she will do it but the teacher neglected her and then tried to make out it was her fault which is unprofessional.

[quote PurpleThistles84]@DollyMixtureLulus I assume you are suggesting I am lying? Scotland has the equivalent of GCSEs. Here is the email the teacher sent me.[/quote]
So why not call it “Scottish equivalent of GCSE” then? People are bad enough at realising we have a different education system without you confusing things by “translating” half your post into the English system but not other bits like the year names.

Don't worry too much, S3 is still part of the Broad General Education under the CfE. It's the S4 choices that will go towards her Nat 5 exams (GSCE equivalents).

I'd try to have her at least look at the work over the summer, in case there is anything that they expand on later in the year, but this year's work isn't towards her qualifications so tell her not to stress too much.

The teacher responsible for the email lists slipped up and made a mistake.
The person who sent the email, did you say a head of department, is reasonable to apologise and also reasonable to suggest that a GCSE student should notice if they were missing work for a subject. The initial mistake is totally the school's fault though.

I think the person emailing is saying that the materials are there and aren't being retaught in September so it's up to you and your DC what to do about that. She's clearly diligent so you've probably got to weigh up whether you want to cover the content now or later.

It’s S3 and just the start of the subject so I am sure that even for physics the info won’t be that hard or the amount too much. Broken down over the next few weeks before returning she will keep her hand in for working and not be overwhelmed. Approach it with “don’t worry- I’ve got the work that was set that we missed, so let’s look at when you can fit that in over the summer” not doing and gloom and stressing over who said what.
BBC bitesize is very good for all subjects.

As said earlier she is currently on day 5 of her first migraine (picking up prescription meds today to try and shift it) and is very very low, there is no way I am telling her about the work needing done until she is in a better position to cope with it.

I will think on whether to raise an issue with the school, I’m not sure if it will really help anyone, it’s done now.

For what it's worth op I agree with you about the email. It should have been an apology for missing her off the invite.

True apologies don't carry on with a "but she should..."

Have you actually looked at the work yourself? At that level, and at the very beginning of the course, the work is unlikely to be all that taxing, shouldn’t be that big a deal to do it in bits and pieces over the summer. Think of it this way- your DD has all summer to do it when her classmates had to do it to deadline and while studying all their other subjects too. I think you’re getting too het up about the downside of her having to catch up.

Adopt a positive attitude to this and don't let her know you are moaning . In the big scheme it really doesn't matter . Support her in doing this work .

@ArgumentativeAardvaark I posted here about my daughter being missed off from an online classroom, not to educate people on the differences between names of qualifications depending on where you live. Especially as I didn’t even know they were called Nat 5’s now, I grew up with English parents and always called them GCSE’s.

My DS went from S3 to S4 and got a different teacher for one of his subjects, who started using two platforms to set work so my son was doing work but not all of it. The school sent a letter about a month into change of year with all the subjects listed with tick boxes in a standard form so "child name" has not submitted work in the following subjects.... please can you investigate, contact head of dept (emails also listed) if you need extra support.
It was a simple mistake, picked up in a way which was not accusatory, and he had time before the holidays to catch up. He is now enjoying his break, seeing friends, voluntarily doing a little of his weakest subjects. If I was you I'd let your daughter have maybe rest of this month to relax and recharge the batteries, then come August suggest she start spending a little time looking at everything, make sure no work is outstanding, revise anything she might not be sure of so that she can hit the ground running when back in class.

Well, the head of subject has contacted you but the fault lies with the class teacher who left her off the e-mail list. It is not unreasonable for the school to say your DD could have noticed and got in touch about it. Regardless of all the other details it's a bit surprising she didn't clock that a whole subject area was missing for that long but what's done is done. I don't read the message as a big blame drop just facts but they could apologise more if it makes you feel better.

Ask the school exactly what's expected and if she can have additional help (resources) to meet targets.

@ArgumentativeAardvaark no it shouldn’t be that big a deal, however as stated, my daughter has depression. That makes things that aren’t that big a deal, a very big deal. Am I not allowed to feel upset for her about this? Have I said that she shouldn’t have to do the work? Perhaps when you are sat with your child watching her breaking her heart over how low she is feeling and still trying to summon the motivation to do her school work, you might be a little more understanding of how I am feeling about this.

Purple,

I do think it is disappointing that you (and the vast majority of voters) seem not to really think about the purpose of education.

The school made a mistake, which your daughter failed to pick up on. The natural consequence for this (not punishment) is that she needs to make up the work. This is a really valuable life lesson about being responsible for your own learning. It is good that she is learning it young and (relatively) painlessly.

I wonder how many of you hold yourself to the same standards as you are holding this teacher to. He/she probably teaches a total of 200 odd children, currently from home, and maybe has his/her own children to look after.

The total missed work is probably around 10 hours, which can easily be caught up over the whole of summer. She might even enjoy the challenge once she gets stuck into it.

I agree with you OP
Your DD 14 was left off a critical email and so had no way to know a online class had started. Simple teacher mistake
The teacher did not even notice her “absence” for SIX weeks= Teacher negligence.
She had no way to “ask” or chase down teacher as he had no email, no phone number, nothing. So her hands were tied.

The only thing I disagree with is having her complete the work over the summer holidays. You say she is struggling with her mental health and has a MH referral, which means it is a serious health matter. You say she is in day 5 of a migraine- that is very long migraine and very debilitating. I would calmly tell the school she will NOT be doing any work over the summer as she missed it due to their negligence and furthermore her poor health precludes her from the rigours of self teaching. Her getting better is the most important thing right now, the school work can wait. The school can do a schedule of catch up classes in September...eg she stays for an extra hour, 2 days a week and negligent teacher can tutor her.

[quote PurpleThistles84]@ArgumentativeAardvaark no it shouldn’t be that big a deal, however as stated, my daughter has depression. That makes things that aren’t that big a deal, a very big deal. Am I not allowed to feel upset for her about this? Have I said that she shouldn’t have to do the work? Perhaps when you are sat with your child watching her breaking her heart over how low she is feeling and still trying to summon the motivation to do her school work, you might be a little more understanding of how I am feeling about this.[/quote]
Have you actually looked at what the work involves though, that was my question? Sounds like you are catastrophising about what it involves before finding out the facts.

It's also hard to believe that there wasn't chat between friends talking about what they were doing if they are all in the same classes .

She had no way to “ask” or chase down teacher as he had no email, no phone number, nothing.

She had contact with him via another subject he also taught her.

@ArgumentativeAardvaark no I have not looked at the work that it involves, she was only added to the classroom yesterday evening and is currently at her fathers, she will be home later today so I will get a look then.

Your point is not entirely relevant however. It may very well be only a little bit of work, it will still hit my DD very hard regardless. She has depression. Anyone with an understanding of depression knows how hard it is to do even the simplest of tasks. She will still do whatever work is required because not only do I not want her to be behind, she won’t want to be behind herself but no matter how ‘simple’ the work may turn out to be, she will struggle anyways, because of her depression. I have watched and helped her struggle her way through the past however many months now of home learning, it won’t be any different now.

I’m shocked at the number of posters not making any allowance for the fact OPs DD is seriously unwell. With clinical depression plus days long migraines, those are recognised disabilities which, if she were an adult either one by itself would have her signed off work. As she is a child, her ‘work’ is as a student so she is not fit for any school work. Mentally it would be far too taxing and difficult for her to try and self teach a subject that is supposed to be instructor led!
OP should absolutely raise the issue with the school and tell them it was their mistake to miss her out and that unfortunately, she is currently too unwell to teach herself the material over the summer and then will need to put in place catch up assistance later in the year when she’s well enough to study.