So I've finally stood up to my ex and cut contact with the children until he decides to behave like a grown up.
He gives me a few days notice when he's seeing the kids and changes on a whim when it suits. When he comes to my home he's always making nasty comments, tell my children to their faces 'don't end up like your mum. Threatened to kill me in front of the children because my son hurt himself and he blamed me ( it wasn't, my son was running and fell)
So I've told him, he can have the children every other weekend and he needs to square that with work. I have to think of the long term solution for when they go back to school. He's messed me about for over a year.
Then he's filed for divorce and lied that we split up 3 years ago on the forms just so he can carry on his lie to his gf what she wasn't actually an affair. So I refused to sign a lie and applied for my own divorce based on adultery.. he can sign that as that's the truth.
He said he can't see kids ever other weekend because he's got how job and he's just took on a course and said he's trying to better himself.. yes the expanse of my making sacrifices for a man that left me. Sacrifice my own life for his. If I took on a course I couldn't rely on him to pick up the slack for childcare could I?
He's now blocked me on all communication so I can't contact him and he will only unblock me when I agree to his terms of having the children and when I've signed his divorce papers filled with lies.
I have done this to show him that I won't be messed with anymore. I am scared of the backlash because I feel like when he does eventually have the children again him and his gf will keep the kids for longer than expected out of 'spite' and for 'punishment'
His gf is just as bad as him, she believes all the lies he tells her, she called me a bad mother based on what he's told her so I don't trust the pair of them to have kids together when they are both so toxic. But he's said if I be 'difficult' and not accept his arrangements then he will take that kids over hers all the time an hour away from me where I don't know the address just to spite me ( even though he has his own flat)
But I feel better for standing up for myself not am I being unreasonable