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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think there must be a way to stop baby flailing arms/rubbing eyes and waking himself up every 45 minutes?!

55 replies

Hallomother · 04/07/2020 12:16

Just that really. DS was a brilliant sleeper up until he turned six months and now has turned into a demon baby at night.
Last night he woke up every 45 minutes between midnight and 6am because he was lifting his legs up and slamming them down (wind) which would then cause him to stir, then he flails his arms around like a demented windmill, rubs his eyes and properly wakes himself up. The same thing happens as soon as he tries to settle himself. He immediately goes back to sleep on me if I pick him up and have him in a tight grip so he can't flail, wakes as soon as I put him down again.

He goes to sleep on a Lila Kuddis pillow initially (has a little wonky head that is getting better) which I remove before I go to sleep, so Imight stop giving him that although he settles much better on it. Won't give it to him overnight as he can roll now (selectively!)

I wind him thoroughly before bed. Pace feed him his formula. His room is dark apart from his projector light and I don't think he was too hot/too cold.

I think he's teething at the moment, could that be what the arms/face rubbing is about?

I was actually a bit worried about seizures/spasms as the arm movements are a little strange and repetitive but they stop as soon as I pick him up or gently hold them down so I think it's just erratic movement.

Any tips GLADLY received as I'm hoping to actually get some sleep tonight!

OP posts:
wizzywig · 04/07/2020 12:19

Its been yearssss since i had a newborn. Is he too old for swaddling, being in a growbag, tucking him in tightly? He sounds so cute though: demented windmill!

Pinkflipflop85 · 04/07/2020 12:22

My daughter does the demented windmill thing but hers is reflux pain. As soon as she tries to settle into a deeper sleep her body relaxes, triggers the reflux and then she's in pain Sad

IamEarthymama · 04/07/2020 12:25

Sorry didn’t mean to vote!
Big thumbs 😳
No advice but good luck

Tumbleweed101 · 04/07/2020 12:38

I used to swaddle mine for this reason and it lasted til they could wriggle free and then I put them in baby sleeping bags. I also used to find that them sleeping on their tummy’s helped even though that isn’t recommended.

Claliscool · 04/07/2020 12:45

Swaddle

Claliscool · 04/07/2020 12:45

With a velcro swaddle

GeorgeTheFirst · 04/07/2020 12:47

Swaddle

Thymeout · 04/07/2020 12:51

Is 6 mths old enough to be put down to sleep on his front? That's what I would have done when front-sleeping was the norm. They can't flail around and it was much better for wind and digestive issues. Good for strong necks and backs, too.

Whichoneofyoudidthat · 04/07/2020 12:52

I used to put a double bed sheet over mine and tuck it right under the cot mattress, and then wedge a towel between the mattress and each side of the cot. That baby might as well have been in a straight jacket.

FreedomIsNeeded · 04/07/2020 12:58

Swaddle. Did both mine until they were about 8 months.

Waveysnail · 04/07/2020 13:04

Swaddle or grow bag. Blanket or sheet tucked tightly across feet with towels shoved down either side mattress to keep it tight. Make sure feet are are the bottom of cot so can snuggle.under blanket

mynameiscalypso · 04/07/2020 13:07

I didn't think it was safe to swaddle once babies could roll? I feel your pain though OP, DS wakes himself up quite often by moving into strange position and getting stuck/whacking himself in the face with his crib. One thing that did occur to me was whether you could wake baby up just before the end of a sleep cycle (so at 40 mins) and resettle them to try and teach him to link cycles together?

Fluffytail1 · 04/07/2020 13:08

Swaddle. Don’t put to sleep on his tummy. If you are concerned take him to gp. Better safe than sorry. I have found through family experience and talking to others that second babies are a nightmare. They never behave and mine screamed and cried solid from second was born for about 8 months! Wore me out no end.

RaspberryBubblegum · 04/07/2020 13:10

Could also be growth spurt?
Mine seem to sleep less if it's a body growth spurt and sleep more if it's a brain development spurt.
Mine both did this though so I think it is normal. I breastfed both though so I would just keep boobing them until they went into a deeper sleep 😅
Maybe if you cuddle him longer he may go into a deeper sleep?
Or maybe solid food may be upsetting him? Mine were worse if they had toast before bed.
Hope you manage to find a solution! 💐

peachgreen · 04/07/2020 13:20

You can't suddenly start swaddling a 6 month old who hasn't been swaddled before, especially one that can roll, so please don't do that - it would be dangerous.

It could be that his sleep cycles have shortened and actually he's just waking up naturally between cycles, moving more as he comes into a lighter sleep and then is unable to get back to sleep by himself. How does he settle at night?

Original poster
Hallomother · 04/07/2020 13:29

Thanks for all the suggestions.
He's currently in a grobag and I've knocked it down to a thinner one and tucked a thin cellular blanket over him but he just slams about and untucks it.
I'm not keen on swaddling now as he's not used to it and he can roll, so I think it could be quite dangerous.

He settles really well when he first goes down. I feed him formula, he has a cuddle til he's drowsy usually about five minutes and then goes straight to sleep

Bang on midnight it's like something kicks in and the cycle starts

I've spoken to GP but they weren't interested and said babies do move a lot in their sleep - I don't genuinely think it's fits or anything but at 5am after little sleep your brain panics more.

He is a tummy napper on me and DH - if he falls asleep on us it's usually on his tummy then we put him in the cot.

His naps have got longer but I don't know if that's because he's knackered!

He does have reflux but we've managed to get that under control although it could be creeping back.

Maybe it's just a phase. I bloody hope so!

OP posts:
Boredinthehouse · 04/07/2020 13:33

Mine had an extreme startle reflex that would cause him to wake loads.

He settled easier and for longer in the car seat. We thought it was the straps helping him feel more secure.

Original poster
Hallomother · 04/07/2020 13:37

He did used to have a really extreme startle reflex actually it hasn't occurred to me that's what the arms could be...

OP posts:
Pinkflipflop85 · 04/07/2020 13:42

How is the reflux being controlled/treated? If it is through medication then has it been reviewed recently, as dosage changes with babys weight gain.

I'm not sure that putting a blanket over a sleeping bag is advised.

Original poster
Hallomother · 04/07/2020 13:47

The blanket isn't advised but I thought if it was tucked in right under the mattress it would be ok but obviously not so I've ditched that.

We didn't have luck with medication tried an antireflux formula and it all settled. Since then hes not had any symptoms apart from spitting up still, this would be a new resurgence if it's reflux.

OP posts:
Boredinthehouse · 04/07/2020 14:04

The startle reflex in DS didn’t go until he was almost 1 year old. It was so annoying.

Any slightest noise and his arms would be all over the place!

mynameiscalypso · 04/07/2020 14:04

Based on what you've said, I feel like it's probably some sort of development phase? It's bloody knackering I know but hopefully it won't last long!

Original poster
Hallomother · 04/07/2020 14:09

@mynameiscalypso this is what I was wondering. I think last time he had a big physical leap he was thrashing about a lot as well. He's really really trying to crawl when on his tummy now so maybe it's something to do with that

Thanks for all your suggestions, I felt utterly broken this morning but I think I might just have to ride this one out

OP posts:
TheChineseChicken · 04/07/2020 14:16

This sounds like my 5 month old DS. The flappy arms are so annoying and he can’t settle himself as he ends up flapping himself awake. I do remember that DD has the startle reflex until quite late so I’m hoping he grows out of it soon. Nighttime isn’t so bad but naps are 30-45 minutes max and it’s doing my head in!

mynameiscalypso · 04/07/2020 14:24

We had a week of really rubbish sleeping a few weeks ago - DS would just not settle and was wriggling around too much to go to sleep and he would just scream for hours. That week he started crawling, learned to pull himself to standing and started taking steps/cruising. It was exhausting but settled down once he'd mastered all of that. Now he sleeps fine but it's exhausting because we spent all day chasing him round!