PFB stories

[NotMyTimes]

I had a lovely (wine-y) chat with my mum today and we somehow got onto the subject of when I was a baby. I am my parents first and only child and apparently they went a little crazy PFB with me, especially my mum. We had a great time laughing at all the things she did.

Some were:

She used to insist that either her or my dad sit in the back with me on car journeys no matter how long or short so that I wouldn't get lonely. Even when I was a newborn and would sleep through them all she still didn't want me being lonely back there whilst her and my dad has each other's company in the front.

Marking all the steps to show which were and weren't creaky, then whenever I was asleep no one was allowed to step on any of the creaky stairs when going up or down. This sometimes involved jumping 2 or 3 stairs!

Similarly we lived in an old house with very loud plumbing. Thus my mum was incredibly anxious about the toilet flush waking me up. No one was therefore allowed to flush the toilet once I was asleep for a pee, luckily she drew the line and poo's were flushed but even then she fretted about it waking me.

Both of these despite the fact that I've always slept like the dead and we lived on a dual carriageway just down from a fire station so if anything was going to wake me up it would've been the traffic and sirens.

So wise MNetters, do you have any PFB stories which you can look back on now and laugh about how you were a little crazy and neurotic at the time?

I love the PFB threads, some of the stories are always absolutely insane! I’ve just had my first in the last couple of weeks and poor soul, I’m not PFB at all but I do love to read about the mad stuff people do.

I always remember one about a woman who was worried about shaking a baby in the pram over cobbles... Then I had my PFB and worried about shaking my baby in a pram over rough ground.

I also made my mum sit in the back too with my newborn.

What is PFB? 🤨

Precious first born

My mum was pretty much the opposite with me. When I was a few months old my parents hitch hiked to the Alps with me, and we wild camped overnight twice on the way. Apparently in a hay barn in france somewhere I wriggled out of my sleeping bag and was found later under a haystack fast asleep.

Didn't know what PFB was, but I do know what AIBU means, and where "Chat" is.

@GinDaddyRedux

Didn't know what PFB was, but I do know what AIBU means, and where "Chat" is.

😂

@BonestoBones oh Christ I knew that as well.

I used to try everything first so I rubbed teething gel into my gums, had a little taste of Ella's pouches if DD had them, tasted calpol, I rubbed nappy cream on my inner arm so I could check if it went red. I didn't wear sunscreen before DD could and used to drag the push chair backwards if we were facing the street and she napped on me until she was 2.

My favourite stories from these threads are the mum who took her coat off after counting the layers they were each wearing and the mum who sat outside the A&E dept for her baby's first taste of peanut butter.

The one about the mum taking her coat off is my favourite. to that mum.

I blended up weetabix when i first started weaning in the blender.

Oh god, my first is 6 months old and I always sit in the back of the car with him when we go out 😂

When my Mum babysat my 6 month old I had a printed itinerary to the specific minute of bottles, snacks, naps and do's and dont's. Bearing in mind she raised four of her own kids plus was an early years practitioner.
Second one I handed to her and said keep it alive please!

I confess I do the no flushing after bedtime thing (unless it's a poo). So silly. Love the peanut butter story above! I made sure it wasn't a weekend when DS had his first taste in case I needed to call the surgery urgently 😂 The things we do!

I wouldn't let my mum put one of those soft spiral mobile toy hanger things on my baby's car seat as I'd read you shouldn't add anything to the car seat that the manufacturer hadn't designed for it.

I breast fed but I bought a microwave steriliser and bottles just in case. Every morning I sterilised everything including dummies which DD also wouldn't take. I washed the whole thing every night in the dishwasher

@GinDaddyRedux

You do know this is a voluntary forum, no one forcing you to read or comment on anything you don't want to.

@HappyPunky

What's to context of the taking the coat off? I've never heard that one before and can't for the life of me figure out why!

@NotMyTimes the take the coat off mum read that your baby should be wearing one more layer than you and she went out and forgot a cardy or whatever for her daughter so just took her own coat off instead 😂😂🤦🏽‍♀️

My mum advised me to hand wash ALL of the baby clothes, including the cloth nappies in Lux flakes, so that the baby's skin wouldn't be affected by harsh soap powder chemicals. I did it for the first three months, and it nearly killed me. My lightbulb moment came when I fell asleep standing up at the kitchen sink trying to scrub a poonami of breast milk poo from all up the back of a white babygro. After that, everything got thrown into the twin tub alongside all the other stuff. (Even that was hard work though, but still not half as hard as doing a mound of handwashing every day!).

@Andwoooshtheyweregone That's brilliant! poor Mum must've been exhausted and I guess it is logical in a roundabout way

I checked my PFB was breathing when asleep several times a night after he stopped waking me up through the night (so 12 months onwards) .. Did it with PSB too who woke me up multiple times a night until she was 18 months. Swear I slept through hurricanes and wouldn't have woken if a brass band marched through my bedroom when I had Baby3!!! Everyone got full nights of sleep then!

To be fair, I still check on PFB , PSB and DC3 twice a night and as soon as I wake up at 5-6am even though PFB is nearly 18 and PSB!16, just to make sure they're still breathing and their duvet hasn't fallen off, switch left fans off, don't want them to be cold/ risk an electrics fire... (🤣🤨🤪). As I creek open the door at 12-1am (I will have gone to bed hours before) I get 'Yes Muuumm, still alive, love you' said sleepily back to me 😆🤣🤣

Sterilised everything to the point of insanity that I refused to let anyone but me or DP enter the kitchen DD is now 2 and her favourite hobby is Dirt including but not limited too eating it, putting it up her nose and in her ears

I used to warm cold baby wipes on my tummy before using them on pfb's backside.

There was a story on mn once about someone deliberately putting No More Tears shampoo in their eyes to check if it would hurt their babies eyes.

I used to bathe my PFB and massage her with olive oil for 30 minutes every night to get her to sleep through. She almost always weed everywhere. It didn't work at all and was a ridiculously unsustainable routine.

Second child got a feed, the same old pj's and was lucky to get a bath twice a week before being chucked in her cot.