To think my new neighbour has over reacted...

[monotata]

I managed to get into my new house a couple of weeks ago. Took a lot to get in with lockdown etc but managed it - had viewed it before lockdown.

It’s a detached house but there’s a shared bit of grass at the front between the houses. Anyway, a couple of days after we moved in, I got the lawnmower out and cut front garden and moved over to the shared grass. As I was cutting it, I noticed the neighbour staring out the window at me.

I Smiled and waved and kind of signalled to him to open the window as I was going to ask him if he wanted me to cut the grass on his side.

Lo and behold the window opens and he screams out the window

“DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH MY GRASS. I HAVE JUST SCARIFIED IT. DO YOU HEAR ME? WELL DO YOU?!

I’m laughing writing this because he was like a man possessed and I nearly took a fit of the giggles.

My husband had been in the garage and he came out to see what was going on.

I said to the neighbour “no worries, I leave it alone...” Later on we were out the back having a glass of wine and I could hear him speaking to someone perhaps on the phone about the upstart neighbour trying to cut his “recently scarified” grass and how rude I was 😕

Now when I leave the house he glares Out the window and if he’s out the back he humphs about when I go out to hang the washing out.

He is going to be the neighbour from hell, isn’t he?

squirtle the alibaba gnomes are disturbing. Just the thing for this situation.

I'd of asked him to stop shouting as he was scarifying me.

If its genuinely shared grass then you could perhaps have discussed maintenance with him before getting stuck in,though it doesn't sound like the end of the world.
If you were actually going to mow his grass without asking if he wanted it done then you were absolutely BU.
And he may be a crotchety bloke but that doesn't make him wrong!

You scarify the grass in the Spring as rule, usually kind of raking it over, to make a better growth.. The neighbour is an angry rude type of person,but precious about his lawn. It might have been more becoming of him. to scarify your lawn as well, so they would both look nice together.

I hope you are not planning an extension.

Please tell me, have they recently put up a shed with a greenhouse attached, close to the boundary?

i need to do some scarifying i think, my grass is vanished.

He is a bad neighbour and you will get nowhere with him so I would minimise all contact. People like this are naturally unpleasant and you cannot change their behaviour. I used to be like you until the neighbour from hell moved in next door. I tried and tried and tried and did so much for them helping them with gardening and listening to their problems. Typically they play the victim. Just avoid them apart from the odd hi.

Kill him with kindness and love, he might be like the grumpy old guy in UP! Ask his advice on your lawn - he would probably love it, if that doesn't work nothing will. I've lost it with lockdown - done well up to now, but ranging from peaceful coexistence to I don't want to see another person again - so maybe my advice isn't the best.

Had he scarified the shared lawn as well

While I do not think for one minuet you need to apologies ( he does ) I think next time you see him it may be a idea to say something like
Hi I am monotata , nobody has told me about the fixed rules of the grass can you explain them
hopfuly he will reply with there are no fixed rules but this is what I have been doing . . . . .

you can then work out something between you , it would be horrid living next to someone and hating them for what might only be a misunderstanding .
However if he is rude / nasty / condescending then give it to him with both barrels ! and buy this

www.amazon.co.uk/Great-Ideas-Garden-Picket-Panels/dp/B00CH271CO/ref=sr_1_13?hvlocphy=9046634&hvnetw=g&keywords=mini+white+picket+fence&hvadid=259044421612&qid=1593650310&dchild=1&gclid=Cj0KCQjw6PD3BRDPARIsAN8pHuE0B_j6YU91VTtUvsUk45q1aeo1lB0W2VL3XPj3H0qNb8RHxg_K-DMaAu_jEALw_wcB&hydadcr=12103_1727120&hvdev=c&hvqmt=e&tag=mumsnetforu03-21&hvtargid=kwd-311480853542&adgrpid=52382527159&hvrand=5064877913761972811&sr=8-13

to mark the boarder and feed your grass with all the best food money can but so it grows thicker and lusher than his

Um my DH would not be happy if you cut out front lawn.

It's a bloody thing of beauty. Our neighbours lawn is full of moss etc because they never scarify, they cut it too short when its dry and needs the length to hold moisture, and leave it too long other times.

I would also be careful about cutting a shared area without checking. There may already be a contractor paid to do it from estate fees who is likely to maintain it properly, you will piss if neighbours if you butcher it.

Sorry OP this thread has really made me laugh. Maybe it’s the way you write. Maybe it’s the scarifying (sp?) jokes

Oh to live in a world without neighbours! What a prat.

Found the perfect gnome for you to plonk just over the edge of the border between your lawn and your neighbours :)

I live in a similar house and when we all moved In my new neighbour who loves her garden did the same. I used to feel really guilty & I’ve often offered to return the favour but she waits until I go to work and gets her mower out, 9 years later she’s still insistent that she loves doing it & I return the favour by pruning the larger bushes as I can get a better shape 😀, he’s being precious, he’ll hopefully get over himself!

@NoIDontWatchLoveIsland I didn’t cut his lawn. I cut an area of grass I own and asked him if he wanted me to cut the other side of it that he owns.

If he’s “scarified” my grass then hell mend him because I’ll cut what I own.

@Figuredasmuch hahaha to be fair I have laughed at the ridiculousness of it all.

Also, to the person who asked how I managed to hear him. Even though it’s a detached house our gardens are right next to each other. I think he must’ve either been standing at his back door or shouting to someone one phone with the window open...which would not be an unreasonable assumption to make.

Maybe he meant you to hear? He does sound the type of person who gets obsessive about a thing, and that thing is the grassed area. My sister has a patch of grass between her garden boundary and her neighbour's garden. Her neighbour maintains HIS side and ignores the other half, which I find bizarre We have a roadside verge outside my and my NDN's houses and I look after that, but I cut the whole thing, not just half. It looks strange otherwise (and my NDN originally was elderly and couldn't manage, so she was grateful that I'd done all of it). It just seems petty too, like "I'm not doing the bit outside YOUR house!"

To be truthful, your NDN doesn't actually sound knowledgeable about lawn care, but he thinks he does, and will sound it to you. He might use this feeling to feel superior to you. I think if my NDN was like this I would try to avoid engaging with him about the grass and just remain cheery but distant. He was very rude in how he spoke to you, so unnecessary!

Scarifying is a bit like plucking/brushing a moulting dog, you're getting rid of all the loose dead bits that prevent light, water and air getting to the grass. It does tend to look a bit scruffy after it's been done, but it's not like you can't walk on it or cut it afterwards, unless you've just put grass seed down or something. (In which case you'd bellow, "I'VE JUST PUT GRASS SEED ON THERE!" I suppose...) Are there gardens as well, or is it just lawned area?

I saw this on Twitter and immediately came in search of this thread 😂

🤣🤣🤣 that’s what the grass looks like.

It’s the same idea but with detached houses. We have our front lawn and then drive way and then this strip of grass down the middle.

The title deeds of the house showed clearly that we own our half and the neighbour owns the other.

I think trying to be neighbourly has backfired 🙈

What an absolute twat. I'd love someone to do my bit of grass.

That’s brilliant @monotata 😂

My mum used to enjoy dibbing the grass, I wonder if thats the same as scarifying, she spent hours kneeling on her gardening cushion plucking bits out of the grass by hand. The garden was over 100ft so quite a feat

@Jenasaurus nope your mum would be aerating it if she is putting holes in it but it isn't really effective unless you go deep. I suspect she did as a relaxation technique.

Maybe he just panicked? We had our lawn scarified because it was covered in moss and weeds and quite spongy. It was quite expensive and we were told to leave it for a while before cutting it.
Perhaps he is anxious and just likes to keep to himself.
Yes it was rude but it doesn't necessarily mean he is going to be a neighbour from hell.