New neighbours extension plans

[Greenfingeredsue]

Hi all

My current neighbour has died. Now probate is completed her house is being sold.

Her son has prospective buyers. He has mentioned in passing to me that they want to extend the property out the back. I am wondering wtf they can’t just buy a house that meets their needs?

The gardens are quite big so there’s plenty of room for them to do this. However, we don’t want them to.

We need a new shed, so my husband has suggested we build a new one with a greenhouse on their side right as near to the boundary as we can, next to the house.

We’ll do this once contracts have been exchanged so we don’’t scupper the sale, plus they would have to get planning permission.

My only concern is that the new neighbours could force us to dismantle them so the builders can work?

Hahaha that’s so bizarre. I’ll never understand people like this. Very, very odd.

We’re hoping to move soon anyway so hope to finally be shot of them. I won’t be weeping buckets when we do leave.

We have neighbours like this too, can sympathise @piglet89, we've been to hell and back including my husband being falsely arrested by a policeman friend of our narcissistic neighbour, it's all coming out in the wash now, but it's so spiteful. @Greenfingeredsue wouldn't you rather have a friendly mutually helpful and respect relationship with your new neighbour? They might help you out one day in return?

OMG @Hiddentext you win! That’s horrific!!!

Our lovely neighbours did some noisy work (having warned us beforehand)l we were happy to put up with it but what got me was that it wasn’t continuous noise that one could learn to tune out but a few minutes loud noise - drilling etc - then a break of a few minutes. So you relaxed then the noise started again and you tensed up again! (This is fairly light hearted btw)

We have had a lot of problems with our neighbours who moved in late last year , mainly around inconsiderate parking , noise and total flouting of lockdown so I was really tempted to object to their plans to substantially extend their house but decided against it ( as did other neighbours )
Last night we all received bottles of wine and chocolates! Couldn’t believe it as they don’t really engage .
Work started this morning and yes it is noisy but it won’t be forever !
Maybe have a rethink OP? Life can be hard enough without unnecessary angst .

@piglet89 and it's not even an extension in our case, it's over erecting a fence and arguing over a few cm's of land.

Of course if OP wasn’t so sour, she’d realise that the best way to deal with this would be to allow access for scaffolding in a contract that stipulates hours / methods of construction. The only way she’ll get any say in how this extension is built is by trading access for scaffolding. But hey! Shed! It’s really biting off nose to spite face and I fear negotiations with her wouldn’t exactly be straightforward

That’s really unbelievable.

@Greenfingeredsue have you ever had assertiveness training? I ask because your and your H are leaping to worst case scenarios, and looking for external reasons to turn down requests that nobody has made yet.

If you feel powerless to calmly assert your boundaries or advocate for your needs, this can manifest in our-of-proportion reactions to quite normal things - think hiding behind your sofa for half an hour because you didn't want to tell a relation it wouldn't be convenient to see them and they turned up and waited for you...

But if this is all and only about not wanting the noise of some building work next door, then you may need to win the Euromillions so you can buy a detached house and then many other houses round it as a buffer.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3955094-horrible-new-neighbour-trying-to-thwart-our-extension-plans

The neighbour the other side doesn’t want the extension either. She told me that the seller has had the same conversation with her.The surveyor has said that a tree on that side could cause an issue if its roots have grown too close to the boundary.

She says no way is she having it cut down.

Oh, suddenly there is another objecting neighbour!

What are the chances?!

Why do you care so much that someone builds an extension? You sound like a nightmare. You don't own the house. Just sit down Sue and enjoy a cuppa. It makes everything better.

If you don't give them side access the builders will just carry everything through the house or crane it over. They do this all the time!
It won't stop the extension happening which seems to be your aim.

The tree won't stop the extension, they will have to dig much deeper foundations, and that will remove the roots on their side and probably kill the tree anyway...

@Greenfingeredsue you’re deranged.

I’m out: it’s frustrating enough dealing with the batshit neighbours I have IRL.

Can’t wait for the new owners thread in a few months. Neighbours being twats about us having a perfectly legal extension done in our own home!

Op, you sound awful.

Wow, just why would you behave like this?

Do you have some deep hatred for people having a lovely lives and being excited about a new house and extension plans.

I just wish I could warn them that they are moving in next to the most potentially spiteful poster I've ever read.

Please really dig deep there must be a nice bone somewhere in your body, and stop this stupid and childish attitude, have some compassion and just help your neighbours to enable them to have smooth build, the sooner you hel them the faster it's done.

@SpillTheTeaa Your post reminded me of the 'Sue, you're shouting at tea' tweet that was famous back in February. They could be the same person judging by the bizarre attitude.

Surely if a tree is so close to where they might build that it could be an issue, surely it will be an issue for the actual house too.

My dad is second last on a long line of terraced houses and when the new neighbours moved into the end house, to apologise for the noise they were making doing up the house they moved the boundary so my dad now has a bigger garden without it looking awkward at either side. (All legal work has been sorted but my dad will buy that house if they ever sell it anyway) They also fixed part of my dads roof and they’ve became really good friends! So I would be nice as it will benefit everyone

OP / Sue. Please, please, please could you put yourself forward to some kind of behavioural experiment where psychologists can study your inability to take on board literally hundreds of people's rational argument but will not flicker in your resolve that you are right and will be entrenched in your opinion.

We could call it the 'SUES' e.g. This patient has a really bad case of the SUES