Men in teaching

[LegallyBlue]

My husband used to be a recording studio engineer but decided to become a teacher when we had children because the hours were much more family friendly. He trained as a secondary school Physics teacher but he's just about to start a new role as a primary school science teacher in a private primary school. It made more sense for us because it means a huge fee reduction for our own children and he's also getting some senior leadership responsibilities so it pays well.
Since telling people he's going to be teaching in a primary school, I've had a few comments from people. Comments like "don't you think it's weird he wants to spend all day around children?" and "I wouldn't trust him alone with the kids so much now you know what he's really like". Basically implying my husband is a paedophile.
It literally never even crossed my mind and I'm really shocked. I might expect this attitude from some old fashioned elderly people but some of these people are young and liberal friends of ours. Am I missing something here?

[Greylife]

That’s awful Op, you need to confront them.
We need more Male teachers.

[PumpkinP]

Never heard this, there's quite a few male teachers at my kids school. I prefer them to have a male teacher actually.

[PurpleDaisies]

I prefer them to have a male teacher actually.

Why? There are crap make teachers just the same as crap female teachers. How does them being in possession of a penis mean they’re going to be any good?

[cologne4711]

I think we need more male teachers in primary school, not fewer

I agree.

I also think some younger women have some very silly views about men. I remember a hairdresser saying to me she would remove her daughter from her nursery if they had male carers because she didn't want a male carer changing her nappy. But it's ok for a female carer to change a boy's nappy?

Yes we have a major problem globally with male violence and sexual crime, but we also need more men in early and primary years education to break down prejudice and to establish role models.

[Ylvamoon]

If that is the first thought that comes into your friends mind, then you have surrounded yourself with a bunch of perverts.

[enyemaka]

Well, men are a greater risk to small children. It doesn't mean I don't support male teachers but the plain fact is that they are a greater risk.

Thank you @Chartsandgraphs for putting up an example post of the ignorance these men face. Primary schools need more male teachers and these stupid stereotypes that all men are sexually attracted to / abusive to children is appalling.

[Outnumbered99]

My daughters primary school has 50:50 Male/Female teaching staff. a wonderful mix of teaching styles and ages and a very happy school. I've thankfully never heard this opinion and would have had to call it out!

One of my sons is showing an interest in teaching and I would be horrified that people think this!

[022828MAN]

@enyemaka

Well, men are a greater risk to small children. It doesn't mean I don't support male teachers but the plain fact is that they are a greater risk.

Thank you *@Chartsandgraphs* for putting up an example post of the ignorance these men face. Primary schools need more male teachers and these stupid stereotypes that all men are sexually attracted to / abusive to children is appalling.

*@Chartsandgraphs* isn't wrong. Men ARE more of a risk to children, that's not ignorance.

[PumpkinP]

Why? There are crap make teachers just the same as crap female teachers. How does them being in possession of a penis mean they’re going to be any good?

I'm not saying female teachers are crap, the male teachers they've had have been good but my children's father is absent and I have no other male role models for them so I think it's good for them to have a male role model,since I've been told that that is actually important.

[1forAll74]

You mentioned elderly people who might frown on this, but Its the reverse really, Its the younger people who have issues with all sorts of things these days. I would think it's good for your Husband to go into teaching , if he has the aptitude to deal with children of all types.

[Rosebel]

Wow! My children always got on better with the male teachers at primary school. I think you need new friends who aren't so ridiculous and judgemental. Have they never heard of men teaching before?

[MinorArcana]

I guess your younger friends aren’t as liberal as they think they are.

As for the bit about elderly people and them often retaining views from their own youth - remember that male primary teachers are not a new, modern phenomenon.
There’s been men teaching in primary schools since schools were built, even if there’s more female teachers in most schools.
I think it’s likely that many elderly people will have been taught by at least one male primary school teacher, or have had one teaching their own children.
And these elderly people will be more used to the idea that men can teach in primary schools and less likely to be viewing a male primary school teacher as a freakishly rare thing.

[lafillette]

We need more male primary teachers to balance things up for the kids, especially the boys. When my sons were at primary school they had 3 male teachers, although one of them was the head and one was the deputy head. Only 2 of the 3 did full-time teaching (the head didn't but did a bit). My kids loved 2 of them but not the third - which is just part of life at school. However I still think a balance of male and female teachers should be the aim.

[zoemum2006]

I was really lucky. In my primary school I was taught for 4 years by men (year 2, 4, 5&6 - 5&6 were same man).

They were utterly brilliant. I think it's bizarre that your friends think this

There aren't normally as many men in teaching because it doesn't pay as well as other careers - not that they aren't suited to it.

[summerfruitsrainbow]

*and "I wouldn't trust him alone with the kids so much now you know what he's really like".
*
What do they mean by this OP? Now you know what he's like?

Has he ever given anyone a reason to think this way? Just a strange comment to make

[LagunaBubbles]

Well, men are a greater risk to small children. It doesn't mean I don't support male teachers but the plain fact is that they are a greater risk

[Aroundtheworldin80moves]

The best early years teacher I've experienced in my DDs schools was male. It was a dedicated, hard working man with a real flair for the younger children.

Also as a Cub leader I work with a range of leaders for the various age groups, both male and female. The male leaders especially get the 'stigma'... But the truth is we all do it because we like the 'job'. Working with children can be very rewarding. DHs motivation is 'paying back' the benefit he got from Scouts as a boy. H

[TheMandalorian]

That is a bit sad of them.
My son would absolutely love a male teacher.
Do they say the same about male headteachers?
I would challenge them.

[CustardySergeant]

" I didn't say only elderly people have outdated views. I said I would be more likely to expect outdated views from elderly people for the obvious reason that people often retain views from their own youth beyond a time that society has moved on. It's a fact. Stop trying to be offended."

Regarding the elderly and "views from their own youth", the thing you seem not to realise is that when we elderly people were at primary school ourselves, over 60 years ago, there were plenty of male teachers and so they would in no way seem to be unusual -or even worse - "suspect" to us.
So we didn't have those views from our own youth at all. That's not "trying to be offended" it's simple fact. The attitude of the people who said those things to you is to do with stupidity, ignorance and unfounded paranoia.

[yikesanotherbooboo]

I really don't think this is likely to be an older persons view ; quite the reverse . When I was a child a lot of primary school teachers were men and it wasn't so many years since married women tended to stop work . Male teachers were absolutely usual and considered important to provide male and female role models. It was during the 1980s and 90s that the numbers dropped and teaching became more of a female heavy profession. The public became used to junior school teachers in particular being women and so male teachers started to be 'other' or 'odd'.
This is compounded by increased awareness of how common paedophilia is and a move away from the attitude that it takes a village to raise a child.
Children are much more at risk of abuse in the home than out of it and this needs to be remembered . The
Men in general are not to be feared.
I'm sorry that this attitude prevails . It is really wrong and our children need male role models and indeed a range of role models to relate to and learn from.

[Buttonsorbows]

Your friends are weird, really weird.

[CustardySergeant]

Sorry, I see that while I was typing my post above (slowly as I was interrupted by my husband talking to me about something else) MinorArcana has made the same points as I did.

[Zhampagne]

"I wouldn't trust him alone with the kids so much now you know what he's really like".

What on earth did they mean by this?

[SirSamuelVimesBlackboardMonito]

Men as a class are more likely to be a risk to children. That is a fact and it is something that cannot be argued with.

It doesn't mean that this man is a risk to children. Most men are not. But some men are and it's significantly more men than women.

Safeguarding principles are to assume anyone could be a risk and put structures in place to ensure that opportunities don't arise for any adult to harm a child. That's the end of it.

OP, I am shocked that people you know (so, friends, family?) have said that his motivation to teach is based on some kind of nefarious desire. That's shocking. What on earth did you say in return??

I used to be a secondary teacher. Worked with a lovely guy who taught Chemistry. He was really good so always got the GCSE and A-level teaching but actually much preferred teaching KS3. This is the exact opposite to me, so we were having a chat about it, and he told me he originally had applied for a primary pgce. He was asked all sorts of dodgy questions at interview, basically implying that he must have an unhealthy interest in children. He walked out of the interview, apparently, and applied elsewhere for secondary because he didn't want to have people thinking that about him throughout his career. He still regretted not being able to teach primary. It was really sad.

[Queenunikitty]

They’re jealous because your kids are in private school and are now getting a discount too! I suspect that’s where the negativity comes from. People get really odd when they think your kids have an ‘unfair’ advantage.