To ask for your weirdest / most vivid dream. (Gross trigger warning for mine!!)

[IchWill]

Had a mad dream last night, got me sharing my oddest dream on Facebook tonight to friends. So I want to hear yours. Anything spooky / prophetic welcome too.

I have really detailed and bizarre dreams, my DP is often gobsmacked by the odd shit I wake up remembering.

The weirdest dream I ever had... I was working in some seedy two-bob knocking shop. Like you'd see on The Bill, or something. A self contained flat with paint peeling from the walls.

Anyway, my next client came in, and I casually said to him (without turning around) "Wash your knob in the sink, there's a love." (I remember, I got this line from a old Lily Savage stand-up quote).

In a nasal twang he replied to me, "Don't you know who I am?"

I span round to see "Boycey" from Only Fools and Horses. "MARLEEEENE!"

I made him wash his knob in the sink still.

He wanted a blow job. After he washed it I knelt down to prepare to get ready for action.

Thank FUCK that I woke up at this point. 🤢🤮😂

Yes, I know. I'm obviously very weird.

I have a recurring anxiety dream that the last 20 years of my life since I left secondary school have been one long summer holiday and I'm seriously late and need to get in for a Maths lesson. Most of the dream is spent trying to find my school uniform and figuring out how to get to the bus on time. It's horrible.

Oh and I also had a dream once that I went into labour and gave birth to a cat in marks and Spencer's lingerie department

Some of these have me laughing out loud.

I used to have the neglected pets dream quite often. I would arrive home at the farm (I now live in a city) to find all the horses I ever owned in a paddock getting super fat and with long overgrown hooves. I wake up from that one feeling very low.

Another recurring one I had as a child was that my Mum was driving my two brothers and I somewhere and we were in the back seats. Suddenly Mum vanishes and I have to jump into the front and drive the car. At this point my dream would all be in shades of blue. Finally after a very stressful time steering a car with no knowledge of how to drive, I pull up outside a shop, my Mum walks out and hops back into the car and drives off with us. At this point everything goes back to colour. I suspect that dream was related to my deep underlying sense of responsibility for my younger brothers because I actually had an idyllic childhood and have not had the dream again as an adult.

I particularly enjoy the merging of dreams with reality eg. In one dream recently there was a really annoying beeping sound in the car and I asked my Mum what it was. She replied "it's probably your alarm clock" and when I woke up, sure enough my alarm clock was beeping.