Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Filmed in my own home

48 replies

Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:22

So ..Saturday night is party night here .
We have a couple of drinks and play music from our youth while texting friends about tunes .
DP was looking back through texts from last week to get a song for BF to guess ,I noticed a photo of me from last week of me asleep on the sofa and DP commenting to friend that I was passed out 😡
I feel so violated that he has photographed me relaxing at home and shared it 😢
Opinions please .

OP posts:
Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:24

Forgot to say ....I challenged him and he said it's not a photo it's a video ...so angry and disappointed .

OP posts:
Smellbellina · 20/06/2020 22:25

Sounds messy

frazzledasarock · 20/06/2020 22:28

Why did he film you sleeping. How long is the film?

That’s a seriously strange thing to do

Shoxfordian · 20/06/2020 22:29

Seems like he was trying to embarass you or laugh at you. Not nice

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:30

About 2 minutes ,it's not about the filming it's the fact he shared it with other people ..

OP posts:
Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:30

Shoxfordian
Thank you

OP posts:
Didntwanttochangemyname · 20/06/2020 22:31

Does he have any respect for you when you guys are sober? It certainly sounds like he has none when you are drunk.

Shoxfordian · 20/06/2020 22:32

Has he done this before? I would encourage you to check that he hasn't shared any other intimate photos or videos, if you have ever sent any

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:35

We weren't drunk ...2 drinks each
He has had type 2 diabetes ( recently diagnosed ) so have been walking 10 miles with him each Saturday (and 5 miles daily as well as my stressful job )so was tired Hmm

OP posts:
LillianBland · 20/06/2020 22:36

That’s such an ignorant thing to do. I really wouldn’t be comfortable with someone taking a photo/video of me while I was asleep. I would feel mocked by my own DP, if he did that.

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:38

Thank you ....he has stormed off to bed saying I have a problem but when you know you know I guess 😢x

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 20/06/2020 22:39

I mean your problem is that he's a knob
Can you leave the relationship?

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:40

Time to gather up my self respect and move on I think x

OP posts:
Shoxfordian · 20/06/2020 22:42

You'll be alright
Much better without him Flowers

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:43

Am nothing if not resourceful and clever ...which is part of the problem .How dare he catch me when I am vulnerable /relaxed and share it ?

OP posts:
Euclid · 20/06/2020 22:44

That was a terrible thing to do and was very disrespectful of you.

Original poster
Teacupover5 · 20/06/2020 22:45

Thank you Shoxfordian ...you clearly understand where I am coming from .

OP posts:
PyongyangKipperbang · 20/06/2020 23:03

It depends on context. BF, his brother, brothers DP, another couple and me are all good friends and this exactly the sort of thing we would send each other. But I wouldnt be happy with him sending to anyone other than them.

So perhaps he did it thinking you would laugh it off with his mate as you would with one of yours. Bit of a judgement fail, but I wouldnt class it as really bad tbh.

HollowTalk · 20/06/2020 23:03

@Teacupover5

Time to gather up my self respect and move on I think x
Your problem is that you're with him. The minute you get rid you won't have a problem. What a twat this man is.
Jenasaurus · 20/06/2020 23:05

My ex did something similar to me (which is why he is an ex) I was on holiday at the end of week BBQ on the beach, had a few too many and fell asleep hanging off the hotel bed, he took a photo, said it was to shame me!

greensnail · 20/06/2020 23:09

My friends send me photos of their husbands fallen asleep on the sofa all the time. I wouldn't have a problem with my husband sharing a photo of me with friends or family, would probably find it funny as well. However, if I was upset by it I would expect him to apologise and not do it again. And I wouldn't be happy with him sharing it with people I didn't get on well with myself.

Sharpandshineyteeth · 20/06/2020 23:15

I always fall asleep on car journeys. Usually with my head back and mouth open. My friends have taken loads of photos of me and taken the piss. Sometimes it’s tedious but then I can see the funny side because I look like a right twat.

I wouldn’t break an otherwise good relationship over this. Just let him know you didn’t like it.

Colom · 20/06/2020 23:20

I'm quite amazed with these responses. I think it's a complete over reaction to dump someone for this? However if he knows you're the type to be upset about such things and did it anyway then YANBU.

Msmcc1212 · 20/06/2020 23:20

Bit drastic to suggest OP leaves him! With close friends my DH and me might do similar things. Not quite this but we do take the #%^ out of each other a lot. Def about context and if it was light hearted, if a bit misguided then it’s a lesson for him or if it’s a pattern of disrespect for you time to step back and reflect.

As a one off it’s not worth running for the hills about IMO.

ATomeOfOnesOwn · 20/06/2020 23:21

I wouldn’t break an otherwise good relationship over this
Of course you wouldn't. Nobody would. This thread is full of gfs. In fact all of MN is full of them lately.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.

Swipe left for the next trending thread