What can I do to get to sleep?

[DipseeDaisey]

Please can anyone help? I just can't seem to either get to sleep, or have quality sleep if I do manage to drop off. I go to bed exhausted, then, ping...wide awake staring at the ceiling for hours. If I do manage to drop off, when I wake it feels like I've not slept, like I'm not relaxing and switching off.Its been going on for months now. Anyone have any tips as to what I can do to sleep please...at this stage I will try anything.

I use a CBD spray which helps loads. I usually get 7-8hrs sleep with it, but even if I only sleep a few hours I wake up feeling refreshed, which I never did before.

I used to hate waking knowing I'd have to force myself through the day in zombie mode with no end in sight.

I also have a back-up stash of zopiclone and nytol. I only use them very occasionally but it does help psychologically to know they're there just in case.

I think it comes down to identifying what's keeping you awake. For me it's normally because I'm struggling to switch my brain off from work.

When I'm really struggling I use a nice lavender pillow spray and have the "Rain Rain" app on my phone playing me the sounds of ocean waves crashing. I then lie back and imagine myself sitting on the balcony of a cruise ship in the sun. I never nap in the day time, but the only time I ever have is in exactly that position - honestly one of the best sleeps I've ever had lol!

Unfortunately it works best for me when I'm just going to bed rather than waking up in the night. That one I still struggle with.

Alternatively, if I can't use the app because I'm sharing a bed I'll create a little fantasy land in my head that effectively becomes a distraction from the work/life battles running around in my head.

Have you tried taking magnesium suppliment. I originally started taking it to help my leg cramps but then realised that it was also helping me sleep better.

I found it worked pretty quickly aswell

omg, I tried 5 minutes of that Latte woman. Had to turn it up very loud to hear what she was saying. Scratchy whisperer. she sounded like offspring of Donald Duck & Elmer Fudd who smoked 50/day for 30 years. Super creepy.

So I tried lavender spary on my pillow, had a horlicks before bed, never went on my phone for an hour before bed, tried the alphabet game, still wide awake at 2.30am. I am so tired I could cry. I don't know how much longer I can go on for . I'm reluctant to take tablets as don't want to get reliant on them, and apps bother me as I don't want to disturb family. All the alphabet game did was wind me up as I couldn't for the life of me think of a fruit beginning with H... I couldn't think of one for E either but I cheated and came up with Easy peel oranges lol

With the alphabet game, if I can't think of something I go through the alphabet with the second letter (so if it's a fruit beginning with E I try Ea.... Eb.... Ec.... Ed...) & then if I get to the end of the alphabet again (Ez...) & can't think f one then I give up and go onto the next letter (F.....).

This means I'm not ever lying there feeling frustrated, my brain is always going through the alphabet. You really need to take your emotions out of it for it to work.

Good luck!

@charmingb.I think that's the biggest problem. I go over every decision I have ever made and think if life would be different/easier if I made different decisions. And over and over things go.
I don't even have a bad life, compared to some anyway. I just wish it was a little better.
I'm not working at the moment which doesn't help, another thing that goes round and round in my head. If I did something different, I would definitely still have a job.

OP I have had sudden mid night waking insomnia for 18 months now. I completely share your pain. Only anyone who has suffered insomnia has a clue what you are going through and I know its crippling, emotionally, mentally and physically. It can cause you to feel so low, so tired, so desperate...I have been there and basically still am.

I've been on a sleep programme at hospital- didn't work for me sadly.
I'm now addicted to Zopiclone, so you are doing the right thing by holding off. Amazed at the ease some posters on here say they get regular/lifelong supplies as my GP is very very reluctant to hand them out, he makes every appointment so anxiety ridden for me. The NHS finally need to invest far more funding/research/options into insomnia as it can lead to overdosing on tablets or suicide. Its really really serious.

I cut up my 7.5 pills each night am on 3.75 combined with a 10mg of Mirtazapine- its non addictive so I get this on prescription. Maybe try getting the Mirtazapine first and see if that works, as its a very mild anti depressant that has sleep inducing qualities if taken at lower dose.
I am going to TTC baby no 2 in July so the anxiety of trying to taper of my zopiclone as not recommended in pregnancy is very very stressful for me. I am going to try and implement the hospital sleep programme that I just couldn't stick to before in that:
if you toss turn for over 20-30 mins remove yourself from the bedroom and go read a book/listen to music in another room for 30 mins. Then go back to bed and try to sleep. I couldn't do it! I was so chronically tired when waking the thought of removing myself from my warm dark cocoon of bed and going downstairs was too big an ordeal. But I've no choice of I want to come off the tablets.

[quote DipseeDaisey]@charmingb.I think that's the biggest problem. I go over every decision I have ever made and think if life would be different/easier if I made different decisions. And over and over things go.
I don't even have a bad life, compared to some anyway. I just wish it was a little better.
I'm not working at the moment which doesn't help, another thing that goes round and round in my head. If I did something different, I would definitely still have a job. [/quote]
It's so tough when your mind just won't give up. I've been awake at 4.45am for 2 days running now and have been unable to get back to sleep. I'm currently running on fumes, tea and the hope that as I'm so tired I'll get a decent night's sleep eventually!

The ocean waves app really helps me drift off to begin with, but I can't deal with putting it back on in the middle of the night as it means touching my phone screen.

Another tip I've learned over the years is to not have a visible clock. I currently use my mobile as my alarm clock but don't touch it in the night. I find if I know what the time is it stresses me out more... "OMG it's 3am - I've only got another 3 hours before I get up - I must get some sleep...", "OMG, now it's 3.30am - I'm going to be so tired tomorrow", etc.

If I don't know what the time is, I don't know how much sleep I've had, nor do I know how much more time is left. It's not as easy at the moment as the lighter mornings give you a better indication of the time, but at least if it's dark when I wake up I know I have plenty of sleep time left available!

If you're not working at the moment could it also be that your body isn't tired enough at bedtime? Maybe try a long walk if you can or some yoga?

I heard something about children's bedtime routines that explained that if a child goes past their usual bedtime their body has a natural reaction to release a load of adrenaline (or something like that!) that gives them an extra boost of energy to counteract the fact that they're not able to go to sleep yet. I can't see why the same can't apply to grownups too. I know I can go from being shattered at about 8pm then wide awake at midnight. Maybe try going to bed half hour/an hour earlier?

@CharmingB I do go for a long walk every day as I have a dog, a minimum of an hour a day. I'm exhausted all day long, I go bed feeling tired, my eyes are stinging I'm that tired, by the time I'm in bed ready for sleep, I just can't drop off. Ggrrrr....

Well.... Nothing worked and I'm here staring at the ceiling again.
I know, I know... I shouldn't be on my phone but I'm bored.

@SerPants

I use a CBD spray which helps loads. I usually get 7-8hrs sleep with it, but even if I only sleep a few hours I wake up feeling refreshed, which I never did before.

I used to hate waking knowing I'd have to force myself through the day in zombie mode with no end in sight.

I also have a back-up stash of zopiclone and nytol. I only use them very occasionally but it does help psychologically to know they're there just in case.

Hi @SerPants, can you recommend any particular CBD spray?

Hi @DipseeDaisey, sat here on the net too (PC) worrying about how much sleep I'll get... Sorry you are going through it too.

Try the Sleep With Me podcast. It's odd, but works for me. I just have it on quietly under my pillow and it's distracting enough to stop my mind whirring, but dull enough to send me to sleep. I can never sleep in silence because I just can't stop thinking.

I had severe insomnia. All 3 kinds ( struggle getting to sleep, waking up a lot and waking before I need to), I did cbt sleep therapy at my gp surgery (one of the gps had studied it) it did help, ask your gp if they do it

@73kittycat73 I use this one www.thecbdcenter.co.uk/love-cbd---800mg-cbd-entourage-oil-spray-126-p.asp. DH has been using various forms for severe pain for years and is an old hand at it, this is one he reckons is good quality for a reasonable price. You can get cheaper but it can be variable quality. I take the max. recommended dosage and it lasts just over a month.

It can take a week or two to build up in your system so you may not get the best results immediately. A bit expensive but for me it has definitely been worth every penny to sleep at well night and have physical and mental energy in the day! The lack of sleep played havoc with my mental health as well, which has also been vastly improved as a result.

No caffeine after 11am

No screens 2 hours before bed and DO NOT take your phone / iPad etc into the bedroom with you. Buy an alarm if you usually use your phone as an alarm.

I read my Kindle (with a backlight) to help me fall asleep. A familiar book may be best for you.

Consider taking Herbal Nytol for a couple of weeks to get into a routine.

I struggle to fall asleep and can often lie awake for hours. What works for me is noise-cancelling headphones and an audiobook or something from the bbc sounds app. At the moment I’m listening to Emma, I tend to stick to the classics as the language and slow place is soothing. There are some brilliant documentaries though and music too. I’m very rarely awake after half an hour, but even if I am it stops me getting frustrated because I can just enjoy what I’m listening to. The noise cancelling headphones make a massive difference as you can have the volume of the audiobook really low and still not hear any other noises

I had this recently and did the following, after weeks of no sleep I finally broke the cycle, problem is I’m not sure which helped or didn’t and now too scared to change 🤣
It’s been 4 weeks now and ... I cut out all alcohol, all pure sugar, all chocolate, all caffeine (no Diet Coke in 4 weeks now...) i allow myself one coffee in the morning, I spray lavender, I drink horlicks, I bought new bedding, I have fan on for white noise, I take night calms.
Good luck!

Any external stimuli will inhibit your ability to sleep, so I suggest using an eye mask and earplugs. & when you're struggling to sleep then keep your eyes closed and try to focus on something boring to distract yourself from any anxiety-causing thoughts.

DO NOT open your eyes - letting any light in will tell your brain to inhibit melatonin (the chemical which sends you to sleep).

I had CBT therapy that worked quite well from the hospital. I wasn't to go to bed until midnight and had to have my alarm on at 5 at first. You can only go to bed if you're really starting to drop off once midnight comes round. If you stay awake in bed for a while, you have to get up and do something relaxing until you start to feel sleepy again. No napping, no caffeine. No looking at the clock at night if you're lying awake. The CBT also gave techniques for switching off the intrusive thoughts.

It was hellish for the first week but so much better afterwards. I keep my alarm on for 6 a.m. every day still (a couple of years later), because if I try to "sleep in", all that happens is it messes with my sleep schedule. I cannot have naps either.

Some of the other things suggested help a bit, like magnesium, lavender. Has this always been a problem for you? My sleep is also massively affected by hormonal birth control.

I agree with Campervan69 who recommended melatonin. They have really helped me. They don't knock you out - it's a gradual build up in your body - but definitely worth a try and I have saved Campervan69's link as that's a really good price.

Other things that have worked for me that have already been mentioned are never ever looking at the clock and making sure I don't go past my natural bedtime.

I think in your position I would try and get a small number of sleeping tabs from your GP just to break the cycle then start taking melatonin at the same time so hopefully when you stop the sleeping tablets the melatonin will have kicked in. Insomnia is horrible and I really feel your pain.

5HTP supplements
Read read read
Orgasm

What did help was just accepting it. I now get up, have half a cup Of tea then go back to bed.

Agree with this. Lying awake is the worst - especially when you look at the clock and count down the hours of possible sleep you have left. I often get up and do some work, or read a book downstairs. I often find I am sleepy again in half an hour or so. Chronic insomnia is crippling - I went through a stage where I didn't get more than 20-40 minutes a night. It was horrendous. I would eventually fall asleep, and then wake up half an hour later, wide awake. Things that helped (sometimes): meltonin combined with nytol, binaural beats (there are free tracks on youtube), listening to audiobook at very low volume.

Use melatonin tablets for a few nights until you fall into the habit of falling asleep and improving your quality of sleep. Make sure you don't use it after 11pm as it won't work. You can probably get some through your gp as this sleep issue will affect your mental health and well-being and most importantly your immune. My friend got some for me from the US as it's available there over the counter and it works wonders. I use it when I fall out of the habit or if there's a big event on the next day and I can't sleep due to anxiety or excitement. You wake up in the morning as if you've had a spa weekend and nicely rested.