To ask if you regret getting a dog?

[Saladmakesmesad]

The plan has always been to get a dog when the kids weren't little anymore, and they're not little anymore. I grew up with dogs and know all the usual things people say (adopt don't shop, dogs are for life, don't get one during coronavirus, research the breed, all dogs are different, get insurance, don't leave it home alone for ages etc). I'm not trying to be dismissive I'm saying I've researched it a lot and am absolutely not rushing into anything at all. I want a dog very, very much and have done for years, but that doesn't mean I don't realise what a big undertaking it is.

But... when I talk to dog owners, they seem to be quite negative. Several told me recently that if they could go back, they wouldn't get their dog, as much as they love them. Another said once her dog dies, she won't be replacing her. Another said her dog recently died and life is much easier now, as sad as she is.

So, overall and even acknowledging that you love them, do you regret getting a dog? If so, why?

YABU: I do NOT regret getting my dog.
YANBU: I DO regret getting my dog.

No regrets. Would get more if I could afford the insurance for them.

I never regretted getting our lab x, had her from 5 weeks old and she died this April aged 12. She was so good natured and brought us all so much joy , she really was no trouble. I actually can't imagine having another dog because I think I will compare another to her.

I love my dog, he is company and love and my fitness trainer. I wouldn’t get rid of him EVER!
But he can be a pain. Owning a dog ties you down. Particularly if you won’t leave them alone all day or put them in kennels. If I want to be out without him for more than 4 hours he has to go to family for the day or the dog sitter.

I work full time from home in a rural location and DD and I holiday in a caravan but there are some things that are tough with a dog, particularly in the summer when he can’t be left in a hot car or caravan. No swimming pools on holiday (can’t leave the dog in the caravan), no arcades (ditto), must be eat out or takeaway food, got to walk the dog twice a day, must be dog friendly beaches, hard to use motorway service loos (can’t send a 9 year old alone but can’t take the dog in or leave him in a hot car)..... it’s surprising how tough it is sometimes but he’s keeps my feet warm as I type and I love him!

No regrets here. However this is now my second dog (first one passed away in 2017) and I would say that I’m “institutionalised”

Also I’m lucky with support my parents can always take care of my dog if we go away or even if we go out for an evening, which makes a huge difference.

Our first dog we found harder - she was actually the easier dog but at the time we were younger and didn’t always enjoy having to always rush home from work etc. It is life changing to have a dog and you need to be prepared.

I would say that when Ddog was young I joined borrowmydoggy and as a result there is a wonderful young woman who looks after him when we go away. She - and her partner and now his and her family- have got to know him, so he's totally spoiled when he's with them, and means no worries or extra costs for holidays. Mind you I always leave them a pub meal voucher, some wine and bring back presents- I once added it up and it was roughly the same price as letting him stay with the dog walker . Mind you dog walker loves him too, so that's another option for going away.

I’ve had my pup just over a year now and he can be hard work. He’s doing a stubborn refusing to be recalled thing at the moment where I call him and he sits down and just looks at me 🙄. He knows exactly what he should be doing.

My house is messy where he chews things. It’s muddy where he likes digging up the garden. He occasionally marks in the house which we are working on (this has happened less through lockdown as he’s with a person all day now). He is noisy and hates the dog we have at the back.

So yes, at times it’s exasperating and
I wish I could have a quiet, tidy home and not a furry version of a toddler.

But... he makes me laugh, gives me cuddles and livens the house up. As he gets older and calms down I can see the dog he will be when he grows out of his teen phase and I am happy with him.

I also timed getting a dog so that he should reach the end of his life as I’m reaching my 60’s which means I can evaluate then as I get older whether I should get another or not depending on how capable I still am for walks etc but I suspect he’ll be the last dog I get as a puppy.

We had huge buyer's remorse after getting Ddog (rescue) and came within a whisker of returning her, even though I'm very much in the 'dog is for life' camp and have had dogs before. She was just a foul smelling, incontinent dervish who literally held us prisoner for the first few weeks. She attached to me like a limpet and couldn't even tolerate being in a room with DH/DS if I wasn't there. And if I moved around the house too much she'd get stressed and wee on the floor.

It did take several months for us to all relax and get used to her, but now she's the member of the family that I least often regret She still spends all her time staring at me in utter wonderment, but I quite like it. She has absolutely saved us during lockdown - DS has been coming out for 2 hour dog walks daily and has transformed into a very fit, happy outdoorsy kid. She makes us laugh every day.

Our present dog can be a royal pain in the arse. He is bad with other dogs and we can't let him off the lead .

However, we give him 2 long walks a day, he is delightfully affectionate and playful with us (family of 5), and he spends all his day with a family member as usually someone home.

And no, I have no regrets.

[previous dog was brilliant with other dogs, and all people, and was always walked off the lead - but this one was a rescue and we had to adapt to him. That's being a dog-owner]

No, no regrets here - ours is 2.5 now.

The first 12-18 months were hard though and I was in tears a fair bit! But it's so worth it now he's grown.

I have plenty of friends and family with dogs who would be happy to have mine for the day or while I'm away. She's saved my sanity plenty of times. I wish I could afford a second dog.

I've had a dog for the last 12 years and I can't imagine my life without one. The mini house guard, constant cuddles, playmate for DD far outweighs the inconvenience of making sure the furry child has care when we aren't here.

Although to be honest we tend to holiday somewhere we can take her, we love France and she's just as much a member of the family as the non furry ones and to be honest FAR better behaved than DD.

Not me, but I visited my parents the other day, and they really regret getting their (current) dog. They've had dogs for 30+ years, so they know what they're doing but their current dog is particularly hard work. It seems like she has all the symptoms of hyperkinesis (dog ADHD). So it's not so much that they're regretting getting a dog, but they do regret getting this particular one.

I did not want to get one, but agreed due to DH and the children wanting one.
I will be honest in that it has been a great decision for us all. To be fair he was easy to train and is quite chilled. I have enjoyed walking more and he is good company.

It's been the opposite for me. My oh was the one very keen to get a dog. I had my reservations. My kids -not his- had finally reach the point of being independent and being able to do what I want when I want was a great I really valued. At the same time, I always loved dogs so part of me was interested. We talked a lot about, for 2 years really and he assured me that he would be fully involved, would do his bit with walking, entertaining etc...

We got our dog and surprise surprise, he hasn't changed his life at all. Mine has been a complete upheaval! Some days I do feel a bit resentful and feel under pressure especially as our doggy is very clingy and demanding but...I'd never expected to fall so in love with him.

I feed, it's almost akeen to how I felt with my kids when they were babies but he is definitely so much easier. We (or should I say I) was very lucky as he slept alone through the night from the first day we got him. He is an easy puppy overall.

Some days I do go to bed knackered and do feel that getting him has added some element of stress and restrictions in my life. Do I regret my OH insisting on getting a dog? God no! Every morning I get up rushing to him and feeling completely contented with all the fuss and affection he gives me. I miss him if I'm away from him only an hour! The reality is I'm back to a level of parenting, but wouldn't change it.

I've had dogs all my adult life. Never regretted any of them, although I have (like parents do of children) moments of deep 'why the hell am I putting myself through this' feelings.

Previous dogs never really gave me a moment's worry unless they were dragging rubbish bins through the house or digging up the just planted garden, but the current terrier - Patterdale - is more worrisome than any of my children were. Plus I can't go away at the drop of a hat because nobody else wants to deal with her many and varied ways of trying to kill herself/everybody else/all other pets.

But she's my baby and I adore her and I live alone, so lockdown would have been ten times harder without her furry little face trying to guilt me into yet another bloody walk (honestly, we've done six miles already, will you shut up and go to sleep now?)

No don't regret and he is part of our family. He is hard work sometimes with his constant chewing but he is kind, loving and a wonderful pet and DC adore him too.

No, not at all, I love her. It's a bit awkward arranging days out that she can either come on or stay with someone else and she's allergic to everything, including dog food so she's on a raw diet which has been tricky with no market open to get the meat she usually has.
But she's my buddy and she's funny, clever and loving. I wouldn't change her for any money.

I did once have a dog I regretted taking on due to her personality and aggressive behaviour. I kept and loved her until she died but she was more hard work and stress than fun.

Since then I’ve carefully picked dogs that would fit my family and lifestyle and I’ve loved having them all, to the point I now have 3

We’re off to meet our new puppy in 20 minutes! It’s been months and months of going backwards and forwards but we’re so happy with our decision.

I’m unbelievably nervous and I feel like I’m about to have a baby 🤣

@BroomHandledMouser aw lovely what breed are you getting ?

I love my dog, no regrets whatsoever. He’s a rescue, but he is also the sweetest, easiest dog, and partner and I wfh a lot (even before corona) so he gets lots of company. He’ll happily be left for 4-5hours (not that we do often) and it we’re going away we take him to parents or have a friend dog sit him. Or take him with us - he so easy that he’ll happily sit in a pub, go on a walk, stay in a b&b etc. He’s brilliant, and I wouldn’t be without him. That said, even though i grew up with dogs the first few months were a bit of a shock - it’s different when it’s YOUR dog, not parents, and it did take him several months to settle in, which were hard. But he’s fab. Just do your research on breed, and go for something that suits your life and needs well.

@pumpkinpie01 a black lab!

Never, ever. Best thing to happen to us.

However, we put hours and hours and months and months of training into her from day 1. We picked her up at lunchtime as an 8 week old puppy and by 7pm that evening we’d taught her to ‘sit and ‘lay down’ that pretty much was illustrative of how the next 6 months were. (We bought her to be a working fun dog though so she was always going to have to be obedient) God the hours we spent on recall training, getting her to walk to heel, sit and wait. And that’s without any of the retrieve training. But honestly, after a year she was better trained than the majority of dogs are in their whole life. We crate trained her too from that first night we had her home and if we went out we’d pop her in her crate so we never had the chewing that people talk about. We got rid of the crate entirely when she was just over a year old and she’s never chewed anything, ever.

She is just an absolute joy and my best friend. She’s not a needy dog, we made sure to leave her for periods alone when she was a puppy (so we started off by going out for 2 hours, then increased it to 4 etc) and she’s absolutely fine to be left for 6-7 hours now if needed, though that hardly ever happens as I WFH and often go out with my friends and then DH goes out with his separately and days out with DH is pretty much always out to the beach or somewhere for a nice walk and then a pup lunch/ dinner so we just take her and find dog friendly pubs. (Plenty round here) if we go out on nights out we tend to leave about 7pm and we’re always back by 1 in the morning and she’s absolutely fine left that long so long as she’s had a good walk and her dinner beforehand. We have an amazing home boarding place near us that she goes to when we go on holiday and we get daily photos of her on her walks and having fun.

So I guess what I’m saying is, to us she’s not much of an inconvenience or tie. We don’t have children though and I often think that’s key. I know so many people with young kids who get a dog and they just don’t have ten time to put into the dog’s training, or to walk it enough and then they end up with a naughty, boisterous dog who drives them crazy and they re-home it or resent it for its whole life.

Dogs are amazing, but you NEED to put the training in and don’t give up if it doesn’t go to plan straight away. Also, if you want an obedient dog, go for a working breed. If you want small then a cocker spaniel could be good for you. For gods sake don’t go getting a French bulldog or something, they’re notoriously hard to train. Working breeds are generally easier (obviously there are exceptions) as they have that inherent want to please and work for you bred into them.

I have very recently lost my beloved dog after more than 14 years. I don't regret having him at all, but I don't think we will be getting another.

There is no denying that it's hard work, especially for the first two years if you get your dog as a pup. I haven't any experience of taking on an older dog - that may be easier, or more likely, the difficult period may be shorter.

If you are lucky, as we were, to get a healthy dog, once he has settled into adulthood there is what I would call a long 'golden period' where you and your dog have adjusted to one another, your dog is trained and well-behaved and he is simply and wonderfully a member of your family.

Finally, things may be more difficult again when he is old and his health starts to fail - toileting accidents, visits to the vet - and then the ultimate trauma of his death.

But however well your dog behaves there is no denying that they put restrictions on your life. Trips to non-dog friendly places (e.g. most zoos and theme parks, and most indoor attractions) either require a dog-sitter or to be kept very short; similar for events such as weddings. A dog becomes another worry during difficult family events such as illness or bereavement as his needs must still be met.

Taking your dog on holiday is a joy, but as they can't normally be left alone in your accommodation, you must be out in all weathers or in your holiday accommodation - no taking advantage of the rain to visit a museum or stately home unless you can find a dog-friendly one. There are odd things, like where we took our dog on holiday there was a swimming pool you could book, but my husband and I could never use it because it didn't allow lone swimmers and it didn't allow dogs.

Finally there is no getting over how generally messy dogs are - they bring in dirt, they shed, some toileting accidents are inevitable in the lifetime of a dog. You have to find your own compromise between lowering your standards and upping your cleaning.

We miss our little chap dreadfully and without him we feel lost; at every point in his routine, letting him in and out, walking him, feeding him, we are reminded of our loss. But we are older now and entering a phase of our lives where, over the lifetime of a dog, we are likely to have to face changes, so we have decided that it would be kinder to ourselves in the long run not to take on another.