To ask if I am mixed race?

[800caloriesofwine]

Such a strange question but here goes... I have had limited contact with my bio dad. I did a dna test and it came back I was about 70/30 white to black British.
I have always classed myself as white British, I can only speak from a white British point of view. However racism is everywhere at the moment. My FIL just sent me a particularly vile meme about black people, and I just sent back 'you know I'm mixed race right?' without thinking.
Now I feel like a fraud. I am barely mixed race. I have had none of the experiences (positive or negative) of being part of another culture. Am I lying to him and myself? Am I mixed race?
My dad is definitely not white passing. However I am. My mum and stepdad are so white and we look like a family.

It shouldn't matter if you're mixed raced or not when you were replying to him. It was racist what he said and you were using the excuse that you are mixed race back to him. Maybe you should have said - you know that's racist. You don't have to explain your race to him or anyone.

The positive side to letting him know you also have black heritage is that it may open his eyes a bit.

For me part of being mixed race is recognising the privilege that I hold whilst at the same time knowing that I will be othered i'll never fit in. Hard to explain but I know that feeling when people show their true feelings towards black people not realising your heritage. You wonder how they think that way, you feel hurt and scared, and wonder if this is a majority opinion.

I am barely mixed race

As your dad is BAME, I'd say you're mixed race. But you're the one who decides how much you identify as mixed race.

Nope just the one race - human.

Regardless of what you are or are not, your FIL is a racist arse hole and should be labelled as such.

I would cut all contact with the FIL.

As a pp said, you should be offended regardless. Not just because you may or may not be mixed race...as that infers you'd be okay with it if you weren't mixed race.

When ppl are okay with such things because it applies to them, it simply continues and that's why we have the kind of world we do today.

I called someone out recently, because he was offensive towards Chinese people, I'm black and his language was unacceptable.

Meghan Markle also looks white

No she doesn't. She very clearly looks biracial.

Lol, literally was just having this discussion the other day. My biological father was Algerian - but does north African count as a mixed bit? And I look white...

Weirdly, DS5 who is 75 white/25 Algerian looks totally north African!

@SandyY2K

Meghan Markle also looks white

No she doesn't. She very clearly looks biracial.

She does. The straightened hair is what puts people off, I think.

Actually, considering her mother is not really dark-skinned, she (MM) is quite dark.

Doesn't matter that you pass as white you are biologically mixed race and any kids you have could well be darker skinned than you.

In the states the 'one drop rule' was applied liberally there are generations of families who were forced to identify and were identified as black, regardless.

" pass" is horrible. Does anybody " pass"as black.

DH is mixed race (his mother is Japanese). Is that enough for the DC to be mixed race? (I tend to chicken out and tick ‘prefer not to say’ when answering the ethnicity question on their behalf).

I'm a strong believer of self identity...do probably best to let them decide. Usually when ticking those boxes it is 'Ethnicity'

Yes I would say you are however if you have children I wouldn’t class them as mixed.

What's a purity spiral?

It doesn't matter what race any of your family are.

Your FIL is racist, that is what matters and how you deal with it.

My brother married a lady with a mixed race child, she a very English rose, the ex husband black Caribbean. My dad is racist 'for jokes', the fear I felt when they said they were staying for days after my dn was born was horrendous. I can't imagine the fear my brother felt. I spoke to my mum and dad several times a day on the run up to their wedding and dn being born to keep his fucking mouth shut and educate himself. I hope to fuck it's giving my dad a sharp kick in the balls. Ironically my db runs a charity for a very oppressed N.K ahem country and dad couldn't be more proud of him.

That kid is my niece, couldn't give a shiny shit what colour she is or not. She is ours, mine, I love her and will do whatever I can do as a Scottish white woman to help her.

It's utterly repulsive that we need to feel that for our loved ones, I can't imagine living that fear as my life. I just couldn't.

@800caloriesofwine you are mixed race. You may not have grown up with thinking like this but it’s a fact that you are.
I am mixed race, currently pregnant - father of child is white. My child will be mixed race. They will be 3/4 white and 1/4 black but they certainly are not white. Even if they appear to be Caucasian, baby’s ethnicity will be the same as your - mixed race.

Also - your FIL is an idiot.

Also - whoever said Megan Markle could pass for white?!! Are you blind? She’s mixed race, there is no way on earth she could pass for white!

@OffToSingapore

I am sorry if I misunderstand but why are you telling OP ‘as long as you don’t insert yourself to BLM’.

Many people become more aware of their roots and appreciate them as they grow older.

thats N.K ahem... No one caught on anyway right...

I am 50:50 white:Eastern Asian. My dc are 75:25.They totally identify as biracial.

You are mixed race no matter what your upbringing is or whether you look white. No one can dictate how you should feel about it or see yourself. It’s simply facts.