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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask, what is your 'vaguely achievable' dream life?

122 replies

RedTravellingSocks · 09/06/2020 18:01

Not the crazy fantasy one you need to win the lottery to have. The one that is a bit more realistic, more or less, maybe, kinda, perhaps one day, with a bit of luck Grin

Mine would be:

  • live in a house with a view of the sea, and a dining kitchen, grow herbs and veg in the garden and have a wildflower patch with loads of bees and butterflies
  • keep chickens
  • have a dog that I can take on long walks
  • work in a bookshop, preferably a small independent one (that also sold cake)
  • train as a yoga teacher on the side and maybe teach a bit as well
  • take every summer off and travel, as cheaply as possible, for a minimum of 2 months (someone would have to look after the dog and chickens I guess!)
OP posts:
Swiftsseason · 09/06/2020 19:26

I'd never want a large house even if I won't lottery it would never be large.
I would like a house that's safe, large enough for visitors but also with parking and that never ever gets impacted by noisy neighbours etc. Drive for 4 cars.

Just a bit more money for more exciting over seas holidays

vampirethriller · 09/06/2020 19:28

I would like to have a holiday every year, a car, to get out of my council flat, and to have a garden.

itssquidstella · 09/06/2020 19:28

I want to do my yoga teacher training.

Original poster
RedTravellingSocks · 09/06/2020 19:29

MoltoAgitato, I did actually work in a bookshop with a cafe for years, but then I had to get a proper job Grin

It was great, I couldn't believe I got paid to do it. It was by far my favourite job (although I also used to be a restaurant reviewer and I wouldn't mind going back to that either, tbh...)

OP posts:
IsAnybodyListening · 09/06/2020 19:32

Oh. I have thought about this lot's OP over the last few months!

I would like to long term foster. Unfortunately it is a hard no from Dp :(

However, I have looked into providing a home and support for young parents and their baby. So with a bigger house and an extra bathroom, I think I would like to do that at some point.

Work a job that is school hours, preferably counselling or therapy, and use my degree. Also with all the school holidays I would like to take my teen and young adult dc's on backpacking holidays yearly for a month a time.

Learn Spanish. Everyone in my family is fluent but me.

Keep Bee's, and make enough honey that it subsidies my income.

Stop smoking!

Be brave enough to get my wisdom teeth out, and get a brace at the grand age of 38!

speakout · 09/06/2020 19:36

RedTravellingSocks

No cold water.

I have a lovely life.

Original poster
RedTravellingSocks · 09/06/2020 19:36

IsAnybodyListening - I got a brace in my mid-30s (proper train-tracks and elastics, the full works). It was a really good decision and did loads for my confidence. It also involved having 4 teeth removed which I was terrified about, but it was fine in the end. Find an orthodontist you really trust, and go for it.

OP posts:
BeatrixPottersAlterEgo · 09/06/2020 19:38

A job that I enjoy, which makes full use of my education and abilities, even if it isn't any better paid than the current one

speakout · 09/06/2020 19:41

I live in a large house surrounded by ancient forest. A great relationship with my OH, fantastic kids.
I run a small creative business, I earn more money than I need. I spend time walking by the river gradening, photography, cooking, daily yoga.
No cold water.

EnigmaticIcelandShopper · 09/06/2020 19:44

Be able to own, fund and have space for a Tumble Dryer

Echobelly · 09/06/2020 19:45
  • Loft conversion so we can have a proper home office and not have clothes drying in our bedroom every night in winter/wet weather, and we can have windows where the light can be blocked properly so DH doesn't complain all summer about waking early, plus another bathroom
  • Giant shed in our tiny garden demolished and much smaller one put in so we have a nice patio instead (DH now working on this)
  • Nicer kitchen - our one is about 3 years old but TBH I don't like it that much, it's OK, but I'm looking forward to when we can replace it!
  • I inherited money from my grandfather last year so am paying off mortgage with it every month (still in penalty period for paying off early) so had just achieved my dream of starting to be able to afford opera and theatre tickets and then.... Coronavirus! If my DH's contract doesn't get continued I'm probably going to have to use the money to keep us afloat for a a while, so may not have as much spare by the time things are reopened. I almost had a feeling something was coming to stop me enjoying the money....!
longtimecomin · 09/06/2020 19:46

Working a three day week Grin

Pigletspal · 09/06/2020 19:47

My house dreams are similar to yours OP, 4 bedroom house, view of the sea to the front, hills to the back.
Bay windows, high ceilings, patio doors, willow tree, pond with frogs, wild flowers and butterflies. 2 dogs, a cat and chickens.
Career wise I’d be working part time in my current role, part time volunteering for a charity. I’d have one long haul exotic holiday a year each winter and a UK break each summer. That would be bliss.

handbagsatdawn33 · 09/06/2020 19:50

I aspired to a place in Spain near the sea.
But the reality is a nightmare.

yearinyearout · 09/06/2020 19:52

Mine would also be to live by the sea, for DH to retire from his current job that he hates and do something he enjoys, and maybe get some income from an air bnb pod in the garden or an annex.

We could actually afford to do this, but various other family circumstances make it difficult at the moment. Maybe in a couple of years!

SpeedofaSloth · 09/06/2020 19:53

Pay off the mortgage and get a part time job.

Poetryinaction · 09/06/2020 19:54

Live on my own.
I hope I will.
I have a husband and 3 kids though, but hope it's achievable in my life one day.

FilthyforFirth · 09/06/2020 19:55

Learn to play the piano and own a baby grand. I have constant visions of me doing christmas carols whilst the family gather round to sing.

Will defo get lessons in the next few years but current space is an issue for the baby grand...

BeatrixPottersAlterEgo · 09/06/2020 19:55

To all those posters wanting to grow herbs and veg, that's one thing you can more than likely do now, even if you have only a small yard. Look into vertical planting. You can get patio sized fruit trees. Most things will grow in a pot. Potatoes will grow in a bag for life filled with compost. You can grow herbs and chillis on your kitchen window sill. I've grown courgettes and tomatoes in the bathroom. Go for it!

shortsaint · 09/06/2020 20:02

Nice thread in grim times.

I would like to have paid off the mortgage, move to a not particularly large house with a nice view, perhaps with an outbuilding we could convert for visitors, with a boot room for a dog. Easy access to a beach would be a bonus.

Part time work.

Couple of weekends away on a city break each year, plus nice annual holiday. Health and contentment. That's all 😉

BeatrixPottersAlterEgo · 09/06/2020 20:07

Christ, I'm living a combination of some of your dream lives.

Cottage by the sea (terrace though) big garden with veg, cat, three day week. Drive a knackered car and wear a combination of raggy jumpers and/or pretty dresses depending on whether I'm a 12 or a 14 that day. Dirt under my nails

I'm bloody skint though, haven't been out of the UK in years, and often berate myself for wasting my potential and missing out on building a proper career

TheSunIsStillShining · 09/06/2020 20:11
  1. Own a caravan home and go wherever I want.
Husband hates the idea, finances don't let it happen and DS just looked at me quizzically :)
  1. to knit something as per the pattern is written. In 20 years this has not happened. I either have ideas and change, or just mess it up.
  1. have an msc in psychology (just enrolled, so in 2 years this could be reality)
ChilliCheese123 · 09/06/2020 20:11

Own a camper van and go on exciting trips through Europe in it whenever we can or just somewhere random nearby whenever we feel like
Have a nice house with a little bit of land for maybe a goat or two or an alpaca, lots of cats and a big dog. The house will have a nice kitchen.
My children be happy and outdoorsy and go to a good school but also be able to provide enriching activities outside school
Have a big fire pit and pizza oven and a hot tub
Dp to have a nice shiny pick-up

Starting with doing our small house with yard up to a decent standard and getting a single dog and a decent tent to go on trips round the UK in. That’s our goal by the end of the year.

Ducklingfarm · 09/06/2020 20:12

4 bedroom house, would love to foster so 1 bedroom for each of my children one for me and dh and one foster children, would also like a bit of a small holding chickens goats couple of sheep and some ducks, preferably not too far from the coast and my own business which I have quite a few ideas of but not got the money to start or see us through the first few months, we keep talking about moving/extending and could achieve the 4 bedrooms here but the cost would mean we would probably be losing money if we were to sell, and were not close to the coast at all so perhaps not yet this may well all have to wait until my children finish school so only another 15 years 😂

Frokni · 09/06/2020 20:12

Mortgage free
Flexible schooling for 2 kids
Novel published
Live in a cottage with a massive plot (
1-3 acres)

Good thread, OP