To think a UK size 16-18 is not curvy but fat?

[GymGirl23]

Yes I know some will probably flame me for using the word fat but I'm concerned about some family members. The Mum is 5ft 4" with 3 daughters aged betwen 18 and 22 who are all a similar height. She and the eldest both take medication for High BP and the other 2 daughters are also heading that way.

The Mum said a while ago that it was 'great' they could swap clothes as they're all now a size 16-18! What bugs me is they are totally clueless about health topics and diet and the Mum has fed the girls crap diets all of their lives high in salt, fat and sugar. Even when they cook at home it's high in fat and sugar with huge portions! The worst part is she buries her head in the sand saying they're luckily not a fat family but are all just curvy girls and that it runs in the family along with High BP! The fact is they are all FAT and it's self inflicted and unfair on themselves. The girls are huge now with double chins and have no waists but hey they take great care with makeup, tan, hair and nails so that makes it OK then? Why can't they see what they're doing to themselves? My Mum says I shouldn't offer them advice as they get very offended if anyone ever suggested they were even slightly overweight but I would like to help them as I know alot about nutrition and keeping fit.

Are people who are that size truly happy with how they look and feel and do they believe they're not fat but have curves instead?

[Happygirl79]

We must not shame others because they are overweight
We don't know their personal problems
Adults must own their own issues and deal with them as they see fit

[MrsKypp]

@AMemeByAnyOtherName

Also OP please take better care with your grammar. I'm not grammar shaming, it just makes it harder to get by in the world with poor grammatical skills.

Was OP's grammar that poor? I don't think so; I actually thought it was fine.

Maybe just splitting some of the text into more paragraphs would have made it easier to read, and a couple of commas here and there.

What was so bad in your opinion?

[NoMoreReluctantCustodians]

OP still hasn't come back to say that although she is appalled by her relatives fatness, that she is also horrified by people spending a lot of time in the sun therefore not being healthy. I mean if shes so terribly concerned about other peoples health, surely the the risk of skin cancer must also be a dreadful worry for her.

Or maybe she just doesn't like fat people

[Rubyupbeat]

I am a 16. I am also 6ft, I am not one bit fat.

[Sonichu]

Of course out of all the posts on this thread the only one OP chooses to address is the one talking about their grammar.

[slinkysaluki]

Rubyupbeat you mean you dont have rolls ? Shocking i mean how can you be a 16 and not have rolls

[Northernsoulgirl45]

Yabu
My weight has yo yoed over the years. My lowest was 8 stone and my highest 16 stone.
Recently I got down to 11 stone and I felt fantastic. I was eating healthily and exercising lots.
Than I had some personal problems and I gained again.
My point is that for me to look after myself and eat healthily I need to feel good about myself.
So judgy fat shaming looks or words don't help.
Although even at 16 stone I still was walkong lots.

[Lollypop4]

Im a size 16, 5ft 5 & I consider myself very fat.
I hate parents who are so casual in saying "it runs in the family".
There are several families in my street who are all over weight and my neighbours are very ,very ,very overweight- Its upsetting to see how large the 3 children are...they are fed fast food daily and often have arrived to school eating crisps biscuits and lucozade ...but the mother insists its the family genes!

[EKGEMS]

Gymgirl23 You should dial back on the anabolic steroids there chickadee you're being insufferable

[Isthisnothing]

Hi OP,

I think obesity is so out of hand these days, people don't know what fat looks like anymore.

Yes of course they are fat. So what though? I don't believe you are concerned for their health.

Also, to the previous 6ft poster who is a 16 and 'not one bit fat' I'm sorry but how are you not at least a little bit fat. You could still look amazing but a size 16 is not slim even at your height.

I'm fat at the moment. I'm 5,7 and just hanging onto a size fourteen. I don't like it and trying to address it.

[Hillocrew]

OP could you be any more judgmental and condenscending?

What other people eat and how they live their lives is none of your damn business.

Fact.

[Lovely1a2b3c]

Honestly this does read as 'They're all fatty fatties and I want to tell them they're fat'.

They will all be aware that at a size 18 they are fat. They might also have several of the genes that are linked to obesity; which affect their appetite, satiety and basal metabolic rate.

If the women's daughters are young adults and they have high blood pressure there may be another genetic condition, such as hyperlipidemia, which might have affected them irrespective of weight. (High blood pressure at size 18, under the age of 30 is rare).

[Hillocrew]

@lemonmaid

[squeekums]

Sorry to break it to you but slim people are entitled to their valid opinions just as much as obese people

My slim, size 6, opinion, your the problem
Your attitude of "slim is best, my opinion is right so they should listen, even if im a bitch about it" is the problem.
You dont wanna address that the problem is your attitude and still just blame them for being fat.
You only respond to a poster to pick apart their grammar, like what, you think your some master of all, better at everything in life? Cos it sure comes across that way,, the smugness is oozing from your posts.

I get the full ex smoker vibe off you, the kind who talks down to smokers, they "i did it, you must too" brigade they are unbearable to be around

[WhatIsLife20]

Gymgirl, what a name 😂. I needed this tonight. Well you can't be a gym girl because none have been open for almost 3 months! Don't nicknames expire once the reason for them haven't been in use for 6 weeks as a rule?

[Aclh13]

I am a size 16 after having high loads of steroids due to lung failure amongst other health issues, you have no idea what someone is going through, both physical and mental. You are judging someone else yet you are there with them all the time, you don't know environmental/financial implications ect. Your ignorance is appalling, they are actually an average size for a female body shape and its disappointing as a fellow woman you are not portraying body positivity and positive reinforcement as a way to encourage what you deem 'a healthier lifestyle'.

[RabbityMcRabbit]

Oh seriously get to fuck OP, you're not "concerned" you just want to appear superior to them.

[dreamingdream]

Call it curvy, call it fat, just be happy and support body positivity.

[GinDaddyRedux]

Here's the thing about these weight threads that seems to always end in the same stalemate:

There's an important need for those like the OP's "Mum & daughters" in the subject thread, to have body positivity. They need to be able to wake up in the morning and love themselves. This is key.

However at what point (and this is a genuine question!) does body positivity become full denial of health risks? The OP is clearly getting a flaming for their "concern" and perhaps this is to be expected, but when does someone who is overweight or obese, get to that realisation without help?

I think that the food industry, the availability of convenience food, the culture of emotional eating, and the thing that's never mentioned on these threads (excessive alcohol consumption, a bottle of wine every other night)....these all make it very tough for people to remain within the BMI scale or any other calibration of body health.

Therefore as a result, if people are going to be "stuck" at a weight, it's important to love oneself regardless.

It's just curious to me that does this kind of laudable and important self-love have an ultimate price somewhere along the line? Or should we as a society stop pushing for everyone to be within an 6-14 scale of dress sizes, and just recalibrate our thinking completely around bodies?

[EmeraldShamrock]

@Lollypop4 I agree around obese DC it is very cruel. If an adult wants to over eat unhealthy food fine it is their choice. A few of the young preteen and younger boys have boobs and rolls clearly visible under their T-shirt.

[AMemeByAnyOtherName]

@GinDaddyRedux how on earth have you come to the conclusion that OP is getting a flaming for her 'concern'?

She has been nothing but patronising, conceited and insulting throughout the entire thread.

If the OP was simply worried about the health risks associated with being overweight or being a large dress size, that would have been very clear in the language used.

Insinuating that 'fat people shouldn't wear make up or nice clothes', calling people 'fat' for disagreeing, suggesting that one poster is wrong because 'obesity is clouding her judgement' - what more do you need to see to realise this is just bordering on abusive. If your partner told you that your weight was clouding your judgement or you should put down that dress at the shop because you're too big to deserve it, that would be a subject for a whole other thread and I'm sure you know what the advice would be there.

A subject like this could be a topic for a very healthy and eye opening debate. Sadly this particular poster hasn't presented anyone with that opportunity, instead making it all about herself and hoping that posters will ignore the malicious statements made so that she will see more people agreeing with her. This has been set up to fail from the start.

[Gwenhwyfar]

" Or should we as a society stop pushing for everyone to be within an 6-14 scale of dress sizes, and just recalibrate our thinking completely around bodies?"

Should we stop encouraging people to stop smoking then?
I thought there had been a slight drop in child obesity, so maybe change is possible.

[dobbyssoc]

@GinDaddyRedux However at what point (and this is a genuine question!) does body positivity become full denial of health risks? The OP is clearly getting a flaming for their "concern" and perhaps this is to be expected, but when does someone who is overweight or obese, get to that realisation without help?

OP has stated that one of the people she is 'concerned' about is in the process of being diagnosed with diabetes if this is true then the GP and dietician will be best placed to advise. Not OP who sounds awful.

Did you read her OP fully. The whole if your fat what's the point in wearing makeup and nice clothes because you don't deserve it.