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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be so, so angry (sorry, another Dominic Cummings thread)

111 replies

ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 00:00

I'm so sorry...this has been done to death and my post is quite long. But the latest development just makes me furious all over again.

An amendment today to the Health Protection Regulations mean that relatives are no longer 'childcare': www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/coronavirus-laws-dominic-cummings-lockdown-childcare-relatives-a9542381.html

Therefore, if you are are worried you will be unable to care for your children due to illness, it is no longer legal (if it ever was) to travel to seek help from family as Cummings did.

I must admit, I thought the (very small) silver lining to the whole sorry affair was that it apparently would be ok for my husband and I to call in relatives to help with our toddler should we become seriously ill...Before this, we had assumed that we would have to soldier on and, if hospitalised/too ill to cope, call social services. However, the Government has now changed the law to clarify that family are no longer allowed.

I could cope with this on the basis of the greater good/preventing transmission, were it not for statements by the PM/senior Conservatives defending (and practically praising) Cummings for his actions.

To remind you of a few:

  • Boris - Cummings acted 'responsibly and legally and with integrity' and followed 'the instinct of every father and every parent'.
  • Gove - 'What's clear is that he didn't break the law, he didn't break the rules, he sought to protect his family'.
  • Shapps - 'In moments of crisis, we seek to have our family around us' and 'I think it was a straightforward arrangement which meant they stayed in the same place and prevented the possibility of the child not having support around him'.

However, none of us are permitted to act in this 'responsible' and wholly commendable way, since family childcare is now excluded. Of course the new law cannot be applied retrospectively to Cummings, who continues scot-free. So for ordinary people, the message is:

"Do as we say, not as we do, otherwise we'll arrest you. Your children don't matter like ours do and don't require the same protection and support."

I don't normally get this wound up about politics but they should all be deeply, deeply ashamed. Bunch of weasels. I hope their words come back to choke them.

Please remember when the election comes. It's a long time away.

OP posts:
Time2change2 · 02/06/2020 00:06

I agree- in what world is this ok? They have just closed the loophole so others don’t follow what he did. How can anyone defend them!?

RoosterPie · 02/06/2020 00:09

Absolutely fucking outrageous

ssd · 02/06/2020 00:10

Am not surprised in the slightest.

StoneofDestiny · 02/06/2020 00:12

Not surprised are you?

ssd · 02/06/2020 00:14

There's another thread going on right now where the op is quoting from the Sun and backing 'Boris', like he's some sort of friendly uncle.
I'll give him this, he's done a real number on the thickos who read the Sun and other such crap.. And voted leave and Conservative in their droves..

ohfourfoxache · 02/06/2020 00:16

I’m sorry, but if my sister and BIL were dreadfully unwell/hospitalised, I would be saying fuck the law and would be taking care of my nephews. No WAY would they be with social services.

The whole Scummings thing has made me rather militant Blush

infuriatedatthisshitshow · 02/06/2020 00:16

This is absolutely outrageous and disgusting! I do not understand how people are still defending Boris and saying bullshit like "he's trying his best".
Why isn't this law change front page given that only the week before the PM was declaring that a parent taking a child to a relative was the responsible and instinctive reaction?!!
I haven't even got kids but the very nerve of the current government and their actions over the past few months is truest boiling my blood!

ohfourfoxache · 02/06/2020 00:18

I can’t wait to see how it’s going to be implemented..... I suspect that there will be some resistance

Original poster
ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 00:19

I'll give him this, he's done a real number on the thickos who read the Sun and other such crap.. And voted leave and Conservative in their droves..

It's the contempt. They must have such contempt for all of us (ordinary people). It's sickening. There's no other explanation for this behaviour.

OP posts:
PorpentiaScamander · 02/06/2020 00:20

So if social services remove your child from you, they will try and place them with family (assuming there is no reason not to)

But if I'm too sick to care for my children I'm not allowed to send them to family, but have to give them over to social services.

Does that mean if I'm sick and give them to social services, social services will send them to my family? Hmm

If so what a colossal waste of time and money!

ssd · 02/06/2020 00:24

Yep, utter contempt, meanwhile someone in a shit working class area in the North of England calls him Boris and thinks they are being patriotic backing him. You couldn't make it up.

And him and his cronies are coining it in just now.

Original poster
ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 00:24

@PorpentiaScamander

That's my understand of what would happen. I can't see social services paying for a placement when there are family carers available. Neither can I see there being a lot of foster carers being willing to look after potentially infected children. So it would be fine for social services to hand over your children to your family, but not for you to take them yourself Hmm.

OP posts:
Babymamamama · 02/06/2020 00:27

This is crazy. How on earth do they think overworked local authorities would be able to find temporary foster placements if both parents became ill? Is that what is envisaged if you can't ask relatives to help out in a crisis.

WelcomeToTheNorth · 02/06/2020 00:30

There is absolutely no way in hell I’d be handing my kids to social services in this situation. I’d be giving them to family. How would they even know?

FliesandPies · 02/06/2020 00:30

Dreadful - and it seems to have gone completely under the radar, this is the first i've heard of it.

Original poster
ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 00:31

@Babymamamama

I had thought (prior to the Cummings debacle) that you just had to try your best to get through it, but clearly at the point when both parents are in hospital/on a ventilator, someone else is going to have to take care of the children (in my case, a very boisterous two year old). And if it isn't relatives, it would presumably have to be social services.

OP posts:
PorpentiaScamander · 02/06/2020 00:33

Its fucking madness, but nothing surprises me with this government.

is it too late to change DS1s name because of Dominic Cummins and Raab

Original poster
ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 00:33

@FliesandPies

Dreadful - and it seems to have gone completely under the radar, this is the first i've heard of it.

Only the Independent seems to be running it so far. That's one of the reasons I posted it. To be heard. At the risk of being annoying, I think it's important that we all understand that our political overlords think we are complete idiots.

OP posts:
AKissAndASmile · 02/06/2020 00:38

What the hell are they on about? Lockdown is over, isn't it? Surely nobody would go along with this. It's frightening all these laws they're rushing through with no consultation. Has the fact we're out of the EU helped them with this?

Thedogscollar · 02/06/2020 00:50

This government is beyond contemptAngry The whole Scummings saga has completely wrecked LD. BJ is a joke of a PM.
I can't bloody wait for the next GE to get them out.

mumoftwodc · 02/06/2020 01:01

I must be really dumb but I just can't understand why they would have done this? Is it payback from Cummings? Why out more pressure on social services? Or surely this makes the case that Cummings was in the wrong even stronger?

HeIenaDove · 02/06/2020 01:06

What a gaslighting hypocritical abusive Government we have. Hypocritical isnt even a strong enough word.

NoSquirrels · 02/06/2020 01:11

You know there's a big social media movement for #BlackOutTuesday in support of #BlackLivesMatters which means A LOT of social media accounts will not be saying anything at all tomorrow...

Original poster
ItHappenedOneDay · 02/06/2020 01:19

Found a definition of gaslighting online...It really does come quite close:

"A form of psychological abuse where the victim is presented with false information, making them doubt their own memory, perception and ultimately their sanity. A classic example is to switch something around that you know they will notice, but then deny knowing anything about it, and then explain that they "must be imagining things" when they challenge these changes."

"Nothing to see here, people. No breach of the rules, just a caring father and supportive family...Oh, but you must know that YOU visiting YOUR family for childcare purposes is illegal. That will be £100, please (and if you challenge us in court, you risk a criminal record so, ha ha, pay up and no recourse...!).

How have we sleepwalked to this point?

OP posts:
Sarahbeans · 02/06/2020 01:21

I am fuming about this. The government has just slipped this one in quietly. So typical of this government. It really does make me fear for our democracy. But why isn't this all over the news? It really ought to be. No one really seems to be holding the government to account.