To ask the best compliment vs worst insult from DC

[PepperPott]

My DS is nearly 3, so he’s just starting to get elements of personality and I’m finding it hilarious.

Compliment - Eva Mendes in Hitch on TV - points at TV that mummy looks like that mummy points at me

Insult - whilst prodding my face You’re head is like an egg (I’m sure the insults will get worse soon.

What’s yours?

I said ' I love you!' To him and he thought about it and said 'I prefer the toilet'

I’m quite reassured by these - I don’t have children but taught reception and would often hear some strange things (in all fairness usually about their parents) but one child called me stupid and I remember thinking have her parents said that about me and she’s repeating it?

😕

Apologies for lack of punctuation.

Ds1 aged 2 and a bit, after the birth of his younger brother which he was NOT happy about and blamed me for:

"I love daddy much more than I love you". I pretended I hadn't heard because my eyes were welling up so he said it again even louder! I had to leave the room to cry...

Same DS aged 3:

"You're the right mummy for me". The little love is 12 now and is now much closer to me than his df.

DS told me that he had “sucked the pretty out of me when he was born” accurate!

I think my favourite was him saying to me “Granny is much older than you but you look like the same age”.

My charming 6 year old announced Mummy your skin in really really really really prickly.
Said round the table with one of my husband's friends came for dinner.

Best compliment certainly wasn't meant to be one. I hadn't told my then 3 year old DS I was going out, so when I appeared dolled up, he angrily shouted 'why are you beautiful ' at me, made my night. My DD likes to remind me regularly that I had her late, by constantly asking why I'm so much older than her friends mums!

Ds said once. "I love you so much, mummy. You're the best mummy in the world. You have lovely wobbly bits."

Although he once did a kids club, and at the end he said he wanted to be "just like Andy" his leader. I thought that was so sweet, then he continued... "he's got such lovely hairy arms and legs."

Mum your big fat bum is in the way ( size 12 wtf)

Mum you look like a princess

Apparently my son loves me for my big meaty hands!!! And my marshmallows tummy...tbf we were having bbq at the time!!

One of my nieces, when she was about 5 or 6 -

Auntie Tappering your boobies are much bigger than Mummy's...

...but Mummy's tummy is much smaller than yours and hers isn't all squishy.

My sister was roaring her head off at the look on my face

I asked my 13 year old daughter (several years ago now) if I looked ok dressed up for a night out with work colleagues. She said “you look ...........average” 😩have to say she’s 24 now and lovely but the teenage years were brutal to my self esteem.

From a dd, then about 2 1/2, after I’d had my hair cut from long to short, ‘Oh, you look nice, Mummy! Like a lady!’

From a much older dd many years later, ‘You’re beginning to sound just like Granny!’

(I did take heed!)

DS (3) hold up a magnetic D and asking what it is. I tell him is the letter D, and he replies

"No you foolish outh, it's a semi circle"

My son said today:

"You are the worst mother ever. Worser than everyone elses Mother. IN THE WORLD"

My crime? Asking him to eat his dinner at the table and not sat in the middle of the kitchen floor.

"I noticed your witchy chin" What do you say to that?! I'm crying with laughter xx

When DD(8) was little she would always get excited when Gigglebiz was on because 'mummy's on TV!' ...it was Gail Force...aka Justin Fletcher dressed as a woman. To be fair I did have shit hair at the time.

These are hilarious!

DS creeping into our bed for a snuggle said sleepily” you smell nice mummy. Just like a doughnut”

I would take it as a compliment if anyone said I smelt like a doughnut 😆

'Mam, you've got a nose like a witch'

Thanks... Thanks a bunch. 🙍‍♀️

DD was sad that she can't see her friends & i was agreeing when she looked a bit confused and said 'but you don't have any friend's i do, I promise!

Not my child but I have PCOS and facial hair issues and my friends son, At cubs, announced very loudly that he likes to stroke my beard.

When DS2 was small he used to say "mummy I love you more than a stinging nettle". I have no idea if that's a lot or a tiny bit,hes never shown any affection for stinging nettles.
Then when he was a bit older he used to say "promise me you'll never lose weight mummy. I just don't think you'll be as beautiful if you were skinny"

Hes 13 now and him and his brother (15) mostly tell me I look like a potato (I should point out its said in an affectionate way, it's pretty much their pet name for me).