Today I pissed on the back seat of the car...

[AhComeOnNow]

I've read a few threads that say 'why do people keep asking where you're going to go to the toilet?' Well... I'll tell you why.. it's because it's a very very important issue with the current lock down rules.

I've not name-changed so I can't be accused of being a piss troll.

I set off today to see my mum. A 1hr drive. I've done it once before and the last time I went with the strategy of being dehydrated. It worked but caused a huge headache.

However, this time, we wanted to meet for longer than just a quick walk: a picnic was planned. So, with my birth injuries plus my diet coke addiction, I formulated a plan: 3 nappies double bagged to make a 'travel potty'.

I felt confident. Liberated even. I drank my coke with zero trepidation. On my return journey I pulled into a secluded layby and retired to the back seat to make use of the 'travel potty'. As I finished, on looking down, I was just in time to see the huge puddle soak down into the seat.

I fear that the bit-of-a-rub with a wet wipe may not have done the trick. Tomorrow, I need to come up with an excuse to go out in the car so that I can sprinkle bi-carb and drive around with all windows open before my husband finds out and files this under 'unreasonable behaviour' in the divorce proceedings.

WIBU to piss in the car!? Has anyone else resorted to such barbaric ways during these unprecedented times?

Use cat litter to soak up the pee. It works a,treat.

I'm not in the UK and am now wondering ... ignoring the idea that OP could not have found a single bush to hide behind on a 1-hr drive, have they closed all the public toilets in the UK? Where do people wash their hands?

You can just use a medium to large plastic bag with no holes in it.

What’s wrong with a kid’s potty?

Gross. You could have used a bush if it was a secluded layby .

ravenmum, all public toilets were closed for lock down, except in supermarkets. We can't wash our hands as shop etc. It's to discourage people being out.

But because so many people are going to the toilet outside, they are thinking of opening the toilets again.

@ThighThighofthigh

I peed in a car park once OP I was incredibly desperate and thought I could drive to a loo. I lifted my leg to get in the car and the dam broke. As soon as I started I couldn't stop so I stood and had a very enormous pee in a busy car park.

I kept my face completely normal and gazed into the middle distance so people wouldn't believe what they all were seeing.

A pro at free-pissing here!

The 'normal face' is avery important factor, so that people cannot understand or make sense of what they are actually seeing.

Then you just leave and pretend that they just hallucinated the incident.

all public toilets were closed for lock down, except in supermarkets.

There are about six the small seaside town I am in and none have been shut at any point.

Try a cat cat deodorising spray then some of the ideas on here in future for mobile toileting and possibly www.tena.co.uk/women/products/ for smaller leaks.

Honestly, I can't believe how unkind people on here are.
Actually yes I can, been here over ten years now and it's actually got worse.

When necessary (I drive a lot for work) I open both car doors on whichever side is facing away from potentially viewers to provide a screen and squat in between, leaning back on the car, same way you'd do behind a good size tree if you had one handy.

I wouldn't trust my aim into a bag in the car.

I'm heavily pregnant. I peed in front of my husband in a lay by between the doors
of the car the other day. (Open back door and front door and stand in the middle). No need to piss in the car. No one would have seen even if they had come by.

If you do have to pee outdoors make sure you are not at the wrong end of a slope, so it runs away from you rather than pools around your feet. Been caught like that, not recently though.

Did you know that the late great George Bernard Shaw was a great proponent of women's toilets? He put much effort into explaining that without dedicated public conveniences for women, women were and are restricted to a radius of their home in a way beyond the effect on men of an equivalent lack.

That's so interesting! I've been reading a lot this year about the tangled web of women's absence from public life in the 19th century, and I do remember thinking absence of toilets was my first and most urgent thought, but it never seemed to come up strangely enough. I also think about this every time I go to one of the only London West End theatres, they frequently only have about three tiny cubicles for a several-hundred-seat venue, I cant imagine how it was considered adequate. I suppose that when people couldn't drink water on the go, they just didn't drink for hours on end; women would have been unlikely to go to pubs etc. beforehand, and men pee a lot more quickly.

Anyway, my issue with everyone suggesting SheWees is, they may be more convenient, but they're not exactly more discreet are they? She'd still have to find a bush to pee behind? I've always thought the issue is only very slightly to do with people seeing your arse and hugely to do with the taboo of peeing in public?

*A pro at free-pissing here!

The 'normal face' is avery important factor, so that people cannot understand or make sense of what they are actually seeing.

Then you just leave and pretend that they just hallucinated the incident.*

@DanglyTasselsOfThigh I need to know more about this! I move heaven and earth to find a completely invisible peeing spot to avoid being seen squatting, are you talking of peeing standing up, in a park or something? I've sometimes considered it...

But because so many people are going to the toilet outside, they are thinking of opening the toilets again.
Might be a good idea
Bit of a shambles over there, huh!

@DanglyTasselsOfThigh I need to know more about this! I move heaven and earth to find a completely invisible peeing spot to avoid being seen squatting, are you talking of peeing standing up, in a park or something? I've sometimes considered it...

I think women actually did this in the days of long full skirts and no knickers. There is a Welsh saying which translates as lifting your petticoat after you’ve pissed.

OP, if peeing in your car is going to be a regular occurrence (and you don't want to squat behind a bush), why not invest in some of these?

www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B07PJV95X7/ref=twister_B07PGQCTSK?psc=1&_encoding=UTF8&tag=mumsnetforu03-21

Designed to hold liquid, large volume, easier to pee into than a bottle.

I keeps shewee in the car and a large empty bottle. I also have a small throw to put over my lap. I haven’t tested it yet.

I really have anxiety about this. I've not had any birth injuries or bladder problems but the thought of having to wear a nappy makes me anxious, I'd sooner go in a lay by then in my car

QuimReaper Thigh is the expert on this, but she has trained us well.

You can pee anywhere you like, in public for sure, as long as you keep your face normal during the piss, no matter how long it goes on for.

People will be so confused by this that they will imagine themselves delusional and you have saved yourself a whole bunch of time finding a toilet! It's a clear win!

You need to use something solid, not a plastic bag. Nappies won't absorb an adult's large wee quickly enough (if at all). Something like a bucket or wide necked container that you can either empty onto the grass, or put a lid on. Or better still find a bush to wee behind (wear a skirt not trousers to keep your bum covered, just in case).

Also avoid any drinks with caffeine, and have a wee early on, before you get desperate and can't control the flow.

Oh op I'm sorry you have a birth injury but honestly next time just use your mum's loo. The 'meet outdoors' thing is to prevent people congregating indoors where risk of spread is high. In your situation where continence is an issue I don't think anyone would condemn you for running upstairs to the bathroom, washing hands thoroughly then leaving the house again.
None of us should need to wee on the back seat of our cars.

I may be a prude but I can't understand why you would share this with people on the internet, anonymous or not.
It's rank.
If anyone posted their DH had pissed all over the back seat of the car people on here would be shouting LTB before the seat had time to dry

It's just not nice.
Do you have kids? I really hope you get the car cleaned properly before letting them sit in the back. And bicarb won't cut it as it's soaked in now.

You either go in a bush or if none is available, you open car doors and pee in the spave between, where you are hidden from view. No-one pisses in the backseat of their car.