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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Has your child played with another child?

155 replies

Thecovidblues · 24/05/2020 17:48

Just curious, noticed a lot of people from kids schools on their friends drives and in one case, walking with a friend and parents.

So have you let your child play with another child from another household?

I’m tempted tbh. Kids are suffering massively. We have been so strict since the start but feel like taking them to see one friend won’t hurt and the benefits to their mental health will outweigh the risks? But unsure.

YABU - No I would not/have not let my kid see another child
YANBU - yes I have/I would

OP posts:
Michaelschofield · 24/05/2020 18:48

Yes I have. Mental health is important too

Lynda07 · 24/05/2020 18:49

I think it would OK if your gardens are adjoining and you have low fences, they can climb over or put over. As long as the other children's parents are taking the same precautions as you, there won't be any virus to spread. The same would apply if you have friends or family who have been self isolating, you could drive to them and the children play together. I don't see what harm could be done in either case.

rainylake · 24/05/2020 18:54

No, and it is turning my previously sociable 5 year old into a recluse. She won't join in the lovely class discos or scavenger hunts that our class rep has been kindly organising because she finds interacting on a screen too hard. Some friends came past the door on a bike ride and waved from the street and wanted to say hi but she found it too upsetting to stand and talk from the doorstep so went back inside again. A friend asked if we could try a socially distanced walk with her daughter (one of her best friends) and she got really excited but when I explained they would need to keep some distance she just said "there is no point being a friend if you can't be close". I'm quite worried about her socialization and wellbeing after this as she would rather have no contact with other children than the weirdness of social distancing.

I thought I was being a responsible parent trying to do my bit to stick to the rules, but after the PM's press conference this evening I now feel like I have damaged my child's mental health for nothing.

Givemeyourbunsandyourbiscuits · 24/05/2020 18:54

Yes, by accident. DS3 bumped into a friend on a walk and they ran around playing together, they were both so happy. Risk assessed the situation and allowed them to play and it did wonders for my sons mood. Wouldn’t do it again as felt awful afterwards but more about people’s judgment rather than the risk to health which was so minimal.

BabyStone · 24/05/2020 18:54

My ds is 7, with special needs. He's had a socially distanced painting "playdate" with a neighbour. Us on the pathway and child and parent in their front garden. We also have dp's dd (4) come to stay when her mum has work. I'm not sending him back to school in June and we won't be mixing with anyone else

Lynda07 · 24/05/2020 18:54

reluctantbrit Sun 24-May-20 18:47:24
DD is nearly 13 and will meet one friend in the park this week, afternoon picnic with social distancing. The girls are old enough to follow rules and I will sit even further away to keep an eye on it.

After 10 weeks of not seeing anyone and only out for a walk DD is starting to get so anxious of being out, she needs some kind of normality and meeting a friend for a chat in the park is more than ok in my books.
...
That sounds like a very good idea, I hope the weather stays fine and you all enjoy yourselves - you as much as the girls. I might even do something similar myself in a week or so (if I can pluck up the courage to go outside).

Problems might arise when people let their children run around in the street or in public spaces with other children, and presumably some parents, whom they don't know, and get too close. Most people wouldn't do that though.

MarkRuffaloCrumble · 24/05/2020 18:56

Mine are teens. Eldest hasn’t seen his GF except to drop off her easter egg on the doorstep Sad

Youngest hasn’t seen anyone and isn’t too fussed!

Middle one took a garden chair to his friend’s house and sat outside his window for a chat! They then went for a walk, but being boys, were happy to keep their distance!

Saltycinnamon · 24/05/2020 19:08

We’ve ‘bumped into’ a friend & her DD in the park a couple of times in the last week or so. We’ve had a chat at a distance & the kids ran around together but kept apart brilliantly. They’re 8/9. Both only children & needed it.

Sarahandco · 24/05/2020 19:09

My daughter has seen her cousin for the first time today and I think that it has been really beneficial to both children.

BlusteryLake · 24/05/2020 19:10

I thought one person was allowed to meet with one person from another household outdoors now? I let one of my boys go out on a dog walk with one of his friends yesterday. I think that is allowed.

Squaffle · 24/05/2020 19:17

No, and DD is an only child so I have really felt for her. It’s the main reason she’ll be going back to nursery as I can’t bear the thought of her not socialising from March-September or beyond. She’s desperate to see her friends and her cousin.

We’ll be having a playdate this week with a close friend and her DD (same age and also an only child) as they have missed eachother so much and we want to prepare them both for going back.

I’m now at the point where for us the benefits outweigh the risks IMO.

myself2020 · 24/05/2020 19:20

Depends how you define playing. My son and his friend weeded a church parking lot together. They were racing each othed and talking, but were way more than 2 meters apart (they did opposite sides of a long parking lot, so about 3.5 car lengths apart). they had tons of fun

Fuckfuckfuckshit · 24/05/2020 19:22

No and I can’t wait until they can

UnderTheBus · 24/05/2020 19:26

Mine played with another little girl for about 5 minutes the other day, they know each other from preschool She stopped to look at our guinea pigs which were in our front garden and I let my daughter show her the guinea pigs and some of the flowers in our garden.

I was hoping to send my daughter back to preschool on the first, and this little girl was going back too. The preschool has decided not to open yet so I think I will contact the mum and see if she wants to do a little play date in the garden sometime after the 1st June.
If they had returned to preschool as allowed, they would be playing with 6-8 other children. This way they will only be playing with 1. Logically less risk.

Jimdandy · 24/05/2020 19:32

Yes. All my neighbours kids and mine are playing out on the front and around the estate.

I figure we are safer now than when I was still at work the day of lockdown where my work did absolutely nothing (did not implement the WFH rota, distance desks or do anything or when I was at the water park the day before!!

bloodywhitecat · 24/05/2020 20:13

Not yet but I am about to. You see 'my' toddler is our foster child and this week we are transitioning them to their forever home with their new family so we are meeting that family this week and the children WILL play together while us adults remain a respectful distance from each other.

olivehater · 24/05/2020 20:17

When they have seen there friends in the local woods I haven’t separated them. I met my friends only child for a walk and scoot along the prom with one of mine. She was struggling with being an only child and having no playmates. I don’t feel guilty. Our kids have sacrificed enough for long enough . Time to put them first.

ArlenesWoodburningStove · 24/05/2020 20:20

Yes, but we are in NI.

Fluffybutter · 24/05/2020 20:21

Nope

Chilver · 24/05/2020 20:26

Yes, but outdoors and socially distanced the entire time. Once in the park, once on our driveway, once in our (big) back garden. No touching, 2m apart at all times.

We interpreted the one person from another household to apply to children too.

Chilver · 24/05/2020 20:27

Both children are only children and us parents being very strict with our families' contact (all wfh) risk sonwe felt the low risk with worth it.

AntiHop · 24/05/2020 20:28

No. I have a 5 year old dd who is an only child.

We've had a few conversations at the end of the garden path with her friends. Her friends and her have been exchanging things like cards they've made for each other so we've dropped round and knocked on their door to say hello, and her friends have done the same.

We've bumped into her friends when outside, and had a socially distant chat.

RedHelenB · 24/05/2020 20:33

Teenage son went for a run and a kickabout with a friend today. Washed his hands as soon as he came in. He's been so happy and laidback today, I think I've underestimated how thus lockdown has been affecting him.

bunnyplops · 24/05/2020 20:34

Not another child but we did meet grandparents (young & healthy) for a walk yesterday, social distancing 2 metres apart throughout and my 3 year old hasn't stopped smiling since.

Keeps telling me how happy he is and cried actual tears of joy in the car on the way home, which he's never done before and made me realise just how much it has affected him.

It must be so confusing and upsetting for many children.

VoteForPayton · 24/05/2020 20:49

We share a garden with the house next door and she has two kids the same age as ours; we realised a couple of weeks in that trying to keep them apart was not tenable so we made our own little bubble. Good thing as a few weeks ago she broke her arm playing with her daughters and I had to sit with her and get her ready to go to the hospital. My husband is the one going out to the grocery store, me and the kids are staying at home or going to the park so the risk feels pretty low. She's on immunosuppressants, I should add, so we didn't go into it lightly.