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AIBU?

Has your child played with another child?

155 replies

Thecovidblues · 24/05/2020 17:48

Just curious, noticed a lot of people from kids schools on their friends drives and in one case, walking with a friend and parents.

So have you let your child play with another child from another household?

I’m tempted tbh. Kids are suffering massively. We have been so strict since the start but feel like taking them to see one friend won’t hurt and the benefits to their mental health will outweigh the risks? But unsure.

YABU - No I would not/have not let my kid see another child
YANBU - yes I have/I would

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Kaykay066 · 25/05/2020 09:20

Nope. No kids around here except mine so unable to play with anyone but their brothers. Which is wearing thin. I wouldn’t take them to play anywhere either park equipment is shut so there’s no point. Youngest couldn’t care less and 10 old very fed up and missing school and friends a lot.

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Chrisinthemorning · 25/05/2020 09:03

We saw the little girl next door down at the park, it was a coincidence but they had a run around together. He’s chatted to her over the wall and they are planning a water gun fight when the weather’s nice.
That’s all but he’s an only and really struggling so we are going to see his best friend for an hour outside sometime this week.

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Sipperskipper · 25/05/2020 08:09

My DD is 3, and really missing all her friends / cousins. The other day we bumped into our neighbour / friend & daughter (also 3) in the street whilst out scooting. We all went for a walk / scoot together and it was lovely. DD (and her friend!) were so happy to see each other and chat away.

It seems ridiculous that they can both be back at preschool next week, but can’t scoot around the block together at a sensible distance.

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midnightstar66 · 25/05/2020 08:07

Yes I've started letting them play with the few other kids in the cul de sac. We've all been staying home and following the rules - no one is going out. DD1 is massively social and was getting down. We remind them continuously to keep more than 2m distance (it's probably slipped sometimes but they are generally very good) dd2 was pretty much refusing to go outside and complained during any exercise- she'd noticeably started to put on weight too, now she's out running around they are playing totally non contact things like hide and seek, older ones doing hockey practice keeping well apart - they are being quite inventive about how to play at a distance. Dd2 was playing schools with her bf from their respective gardens (not fenced) with the small road separating them.

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Egg · 25/05/2020 07:28

Sorry yes @OverZoomed and @nanbread. I did mean for children old enough to be unsupervised.

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stuckindoors77 · 25/05/2020 07:25

Yes the boy from next door, they played basket ball in the front drive last week. Outdoors, social distanced, no sharing of equipment. I considered it meeting one other person for exercise. If he's going back to school in the near future I'd rather he played with one other child under my supervision first so I can see that he's doing it safely.

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nanbread · 25/05/2020 07:17

This is 'ok', I believe. In the changes/relaxation recently added when it was announced you could see one other person.

@Oblomov20 sadly it's not ok, an adult is allowed to meet another single adult and presumably a child old enough to go out by themselves can meet another child alone, but the rules are that it's not ok for an adult to facilitate the socially distanced meeting of two children. It's bloody ridiculous. Especially for lone parents who are as isolated as ever and more so than everyone else.

Also you can meet in the park, but meeting in your front garden is against the rules.

Really confused. Anyone is allowed to meet up with one other person at a time outside of their own household. Why wouldn’t you let your children do this (if they want to and can be trusted to be sensible)?

Well I wouldn't let my children do this as they're too young to go out by themselves. So it only really applies to children 9+ (depending where you live etc)

Many people also wouldn't allow it because they don't agree with the relaxing of the rules at this time.

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Drama123 · 25/05/2020 07:08

Only online!
Bit off thread, but I was amazed at how well children manage to play online, hide and seek etc.

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Henlie · 25/05/2020 07:04

Today we’re going round to sit in the garden of DD’s school friend and his family. We live in the countryside with lots of room to socially distance. DD and her school friend (age 5) will both be going back to school on 1 June and will be in the same bubble anyway - and mixing fairly freely with each other.

She’s not seen any other children in person. But kept in contact with class mates via daily Zoom calls.

Im pleased that the younger ones are going back to school next week, I think it’s much needed in the age 4-6 age range.

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Oblomov20 · 25/05/2020 07:03

Yes. Twice. In the last week. Ds2 was invited to go on a bike ride with his very close friend, and his dad. He is older and quite responsible.

Social distancing adhered to. 2 m apart.

This is 'ok', I believe. In the changes/relaxation recently added when it was announced you could see one other person.
Or rather this sits 'ok' with me and Dh.

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Blackbear19 · 25/05/2020 07:01

Twice they've had a 5 minute race around on bikes when we happened to have met neighbour kids in the street. Certainly nothing planned or anything longer.

My 9 year old was really struggling at one point Sad. Before lockdown he didn't have any form of social communication with his own friends. And I suspect that's not that uncommon for that age group.

The first 8 weeks I struggled to keep my own head above water. I didn't have head space to sort much out for him beyond a couple of calls with my friends kids. He's since had a few zoom calls with his own pals which has helped enormously and he now has Xbox which hopefully will give him a proper communication channel.

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CovidicusRex · 25/05/2020 07:00

Yes. We’ve provided care to another child in our house. I allowed our children to play with him during that time.

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OverZoomed · 25/05/2020 07:00

Egg - because they’re too young to meet up by themselves? Because it’s not possible to meet without an adult helping them cross a tricky road with them, or driving them? I personally think that the next step in easing lockdown should be allowing two families to meet in a socially distanced way outside. That way, the youngest kids who most need to play (but need adult supervision to be safe outside and to socially distance) can meet up. It would do wonders for their mental health.

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Wondergirl100 · 25/05/2020 06:59

@fluffybutter It's been ten weeks now of children not playing with friends and yes parents are making decisions based on risk analysis - there are many, many scientists (I could link if you want more detalis) who say children are completely safe from transmission outdoors.

What is more - we are all very safe outdoors - the risk of transmission is negligible - children are almost completely safe from Covid (they are more at risk from being hit by cars) - so - allowing them to play and helping their mental health is a low risk activity that is very good for them. Let them run in the park - they will absolutely not get Covid.

Covid transmits in cramped indoor settings or very crowded large events - there have been many studies of the viral transmission that show this.

I believe the govt should have allowed this already - but they don't think about children sadly.

Meanwhile in London where I live the tubes and building sites are packed but children are supposed to stay locked up.

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TooSadToSay · 25/05/2020 06:58

We just bumped into friends in the park so they played for 5 mins or so, mostly distanced but I wasn't keenly enforcing or anything. We've been really trying to stick to the rules.

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Florrieboo · 25/05/2020 06:57

My kids must be incredibly resilient (which I am glad of) because they really are not suffering from not seeing their friends, yes they miss them and look forward to seeing them again but none of the 3 of them are struggling or upset. They know this is not done lightly. I don't think it will have any long term effects on them, in fact for most children they will go back to "normal" as soon as restrictions lift because everyone will have been in the same boat, at least the ones who have been following guidelines.

As for people worrying about toddlers and development, I wouldn't worry, as long as they are having play time with caregivers they will probably be developing just as well if not better than if they were spending time with peers.

All that said we are in Australia and my daughter is returning to school tomorrow anyway.

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BeforeIPutOnMyMakeup · 25/05/2020 06:49

@Fluffybutter yes. If the PMs senior advisor can make up excuses for travelling over 250 for childcare, posters on here can make up excuses to protect the mental health of their children.

My toddler keeps hearing other children and getting upset. The other children, some of whom I know, are also visibly upset they can't play with others they see.

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Egg · 25/05/2020 06:46

Really confused. Anyone is allowed to meet up with one other person at a time outside of their own household. Why wouldn’t you let your children do this (if they want to and can be trusted to be sensible)?

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Cliffdonville · 25/05/2020 06:43

No, my DD hasn't seen another child since 6th March. I'm really worried about her, she misses playing so much.

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Parkmama · 25/05/2020 06:38

Not any organised play dates but we have seen their friends from school in the park by chance and in that scenario have chatted from afar observing social distancing. DDD1 is 8 and has been invited to meet friends from school (with us chaperoning of course) but we have said no as we aren't ready yet. DD2 is 5 and we feel it's not fair for one to meet friends and not the other, they very much need to be treated the same at this time. We've also said no because we haven't seen any family at all and just think it's easier to stick to one rule rather than confuse them by saying we can meet this person but we can't see that person etc. We're of the mindset that once the R starts to reduce a bit more and guidance relaxes further eg. we can meet in larger groups outside the house, that's when we will relax a bit more too.

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Fluffybutter · 25/05/2020 06:38

Yes bunch of 5 Year 1 school friends met up for a run in the park 2 days ago.
Is this it now then ?
People just doing what they feel like ,regardless?

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Youneverknowwhatyourgonnaget · 25/05/2020 06:37

Since you was allowed to see one person my dd 13 has met her cousin for walks about 3 times and honestly she is like a completely different person. I’m so pleased she was definitely struggling I walked in and found her crying at one point she was so unhappy. She still won’t meet up with friends which I really want her to do but think it’s been that long the damage has been done.They are the least at risk yet suffering the most I worry so much for their mental health. We have to get them back to school and back to their lives!!

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Itstheprinciple · 25/05/2020 06:25

My DD13 met one friend socially distanced for the first time yesterday in the park.

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DollyParton2 · 25/05/2020 06:22

Yes bunch of 5 Year 1 school friends met up for a run in the park 2 days ago.

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SpaceDance · 25/05/2020 06:09

What are the rules now? I wasn't aware that we were allowed to mix yet.

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