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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to be upset for loosing my job over this?

97 replies

Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 02:13

After being unemployed for a couple of years due to chronic illness and then going to university as a mature student, I got a temporary job as an English language teacher (to cover someone who was unwell). At the interview, the lady was looking over my CV and suddenly said something like "Oh! Whoever looked at your application didn't look at it properly. We wanted someone with more experience than this, but it's too late now." For context, I had a teaching certificate from about 4 years prior and one year's part time experience.
Anyway, she gave me the job which was four hours a day for one week, with the possibility of more cover work in the future. The first few days went well, but then something went wrong. I was using lesson plans and materials made by the teacher I was covering for and I hadn't noticed that an exercise was missing from their worksheets. Some of the students noticed and started to look worried and confused. I realized what had happened and told them not to worry, to move on to the next exercise. There still seemed to be confusion so I went around the room and checked each student understood and got them to move on. I didn't think anything more of it, but the next day my boss came up to me and said a large group of students had complained about my teaching after that class, saying that they didn't understand what was going on, I had confused them and provided them with a worksheet that had a missing item. She asked me if I had given them the worksheets and not told them what to do. I said no, I explained everything, I just didn't notice that mistake at first. She didn't seem convinced and said "Well, it's partly not your fault." After that she randomly turned up in the middle of my lesson to observe me, which I guess was fine. After I had completed the week, she said she didn't think I was suitable to continue, and maybe I could contact them again when I had more experience.
I don't have much of an issue with her not wanting to keep me on (although it's a bit annoying that everyone wants you to be experienced, but then won't provide you with said experience), but I felt extremely anxious and guilty that a gang of the students had complained about me. Most of the lesson they were texting on their phones or just sitting staring into space not doing their work. They are paying a lot of money for that course, so I could understand with me being an inexperienced teacher they didn't feel like they were getting their money's worth, but they didn't seem interested or motivated during the lesson anyway.
This has completely knocked my confidence. I'm sure it seems pathetic and like I'm being too sensitive. When I told my friend about she said "meh, forget about it." It was a huge deal for me to work there, if only for a week. I am still dealing with a chronic illness and have really low self confidence. I had such a positive experience with a different group of students at the start of the week and it just keeps going around in my head that I was a terrible teacher. I don't know how to stop feeling awful over this experience and scared to work again.

OP posts:
redcarbluecar · 20/05/2020 04:48

You were new to the job and needed time, support and encouragement. Your boss should have given you that, not snippy comments about your experience and (effectively) pushing you out when things weren’t perfect in the first week. Students do sometimes complain about new teachers, because change unsettles them, and this needs to be handled in a way that reassures the students without undermining the teacher. If you were seriously underperforming over a longer period of time that’s different, but you needed far more of a chance here.
What I’m saying is that I think you’re well out of this job. I hope you find something better in the future, which will enable you to build up your skills and confidence. Don’t give up.

OneNewName · 20/05/2020 05:22

You're teaching English and can't spell?!

@patstpie You are criticising someone's spelling and you appear not to be able to punctuate.

OP Flowers

Seaweed42 · 20/05/2020 05:46

Think of it this way, 'my aim is to help students, not to be perfect'. It was what it was - an inexperienced teacher doing her first classes. Cut yourself some slack. Mistakes help us learn. Persistence rather than perfection. Persist, persist, persist. Don't listen to your self doubt. Do what you wanted your students to do -to take a flexible approach, roll with some blips, and move on with the work. Can you shadow someone or assist another teacher as a volunteer for a while? Any kind of volunteer work with groups will help you gain confidence too while looking for work. Best of luck.

Goatinthegarden · 20/05/2020 06:10

Unfortunately not the case. I once taught in a school where kids would see a new teacher and do all in their power to be awful. Someone in my form even told me "We're going to get rid of the new one just as we did with all the previous ones, we gie them two weeks", followed by a very cruel laughing from the class. School could not fill a few posts long term because people, and while some not great, some were actually pretty good teachers, kept on leaving after a few weeks.
Unfortunately it's not true that if you're great as a teacher children will just somehow magically engage. Sometimes they are just disengaged from education full stop, and oyu can bend over backwards and get no results.

That is quite often the nature of kids, I remember giving supply teachers a hard time and I was a ‘good’ child. Change is hard for them and they don’t have a relationship with, or interest In, a new teacher that has just walked in. I’ve seen dreadful, unreachable classes be turned around by an effective teacher.

The best thing I ever did as a teacher was realise that if the kids are not engaged then it is because I haven’t got it right. If you blame them for being disengaged, then you will never get them back. It’s definitely easier with some groups than others, but there is always a way to get them focused and interested.

You can’t be sensitive though OP, if you are to survive as a teacher you have to develop a thick skin.

Reastie · 20/05/2020 06:20

Op it’s just a v unfortunate experience. Try not to be down on yourself and instead chalk it up to experience and don’t let it get you down. It doesn’t mean teaching will always be like that.

SecondaryBurnzzz · 20/05/2020 07:03

I fully sympathise OP, I did teacher training late in life and it was awful. I just wasn't up to it. You need to have absolute self-belief and exude confidence, have millions of resources ready and be prepared for everything - the toughest job I've ever had. It was far too much for me and I still haven't recovered from the experience, and have suffered from low self-esteem and anxiety ever since!
Can you teach English to professionals instead? Or offer conversation practice? If you can find a company that does this online you could work remotely with people all around the world from the comfort of your home.
Good luck, I'm sure you'll find something.

GinDaddyRedux · 20/05/2020 07:18

I don't mean to be critical but how are so many people in a position to instruct others in English and yet always spell "lose" as "loose" every time?

That would be grounds enough for me.

AJPTaylor · 20/05/2020 07:35

In reality the boss when they said they were looking for someone with more experience probably meant that they had no intention of keeping you but you were better than nothing!
You probably could have been perfect in that time and they would have found a reason to get rid of you.

TryingToBeBold · 20/05/2020 07:42

From someone who remembers secondary school well...
Supply teachers will get a hard time from the outset.
The work set is barely relevant and only fills in the time until the normal teacher gets back (because you don't know if you'll get the same supply teacher anyway).
Supply teacher lessons were a chance to push the boundaries,wind the teacher up. As harsh as it sound that's just what it was and the teacher was normally a pushover.

Chances are your inexperience would have showed either through confidence or presentation of the work and demeanor and unfortunately the students would have picked up on that to their advantage and use it as a doss lesson.. and itll be your fault because you're the teacher and were meant to be prepared

I mean no offence.. I remember secondary years well.

DivGirl · 20/05/2020 07:44

It sounds like she gave you the benefit of the doubt despite your lack of experience, and you just weren't up to the standard she was looking for. I don't think you can blame the kids for this.

It's unfortunate but if you want that kind of job (and I can't tell whether you really do or not) maybe you should look at some shadowing, and doing some tutoring in the meantime. You could also try some drama/improv workshops to work on your engagement and crowd control.

Divebar · 20/05/2020 07:50

I’m not a teacher but I’m a trainer - there is definitely a degree of performance involved in standing at the front and holding the attention of people. You’ve also got to have tactics ready to deal with those being disruptive and on their phones etc - but maybe with a degree of humour.. Perhaps an online teaching job would work for you and you could work from home? My DD8 has just started with an online school who are offering 2 hour daily classes for groups of up to 15 students. They also offer one to one tutoring for children online. I think ordinarily they specialise in kids who are home schooled permanently but the teacher has been great and is keeping my DD engaged and getting her brain back in use. I’m thinking of adding some one to one for a language. It wouldn’t have been something I would have considered prior to CV.19

DoorKnobber · 20/05/2020 07:52

@MonaLisaDoesntSmile I currently work in a school were the students admittedly terrorise new staff... to ‘character build’ apparently!

AllIMissNowIsTheSea · 20/05/2020 08:02

I would just add that in your first week teaching fee paying students who don't have to be there, in a new setting, you'd usually be all singing, all dancing, with lots of very interactive activities planned. The head/ director of the school will have been expecting a bit of an interactive performance when she came to observe.

You need to show in your teaching that you understand different learning styles and how to engage students and keep them learning - games, multisensory input, something visual, something auditory, something kinasthetic, some repetition, some writing, some conversation, something requiring the students to stand up and move - even with social distancing in place. You need to show flexibility, creativity, ability to read the room and adapt and empathy for students - you need to twig instantly when they haven't understood and alter your communication to their level of English.

Handing out worksheets prepared by the teacher you're covering for won't get you hired in the crowded market of EFL teaching.

Sadly if you have low energy due to chronic illness it will be quite hard to get established as an EFL classroom teacher as you do need to be quite high energy to engage the group, especially if they are somewhat hostile or reluctant (there becasue their parents want them to be not because they do). 1:1 or small group tutoring may well suit you better as you say, because you can establish a quieter, more personal learning environment.

Good luck!

Roselilly36 · 20/05/2020 08:07

Well done you OP, and I genuinely mean that, I have a chronic illness too I know how draining it can be, so you rock being able to teach. Wishing you all the best for the future. Flowers

Porridgeoat · 20/05/2020 08:12

You just need a bit of experience and you can obtain that voluntarily. Contact a couple of local primary schools and ask if you can help with existing small reading groups or reading 1:1 and also school day trips .

Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:22

@GinDaddyRedux It's funny how people who are criticizing start their sentence with "I don't mean to criticize..." It's a fair enough point in this context, I get it, but firstly I explained to someone else I have a chronic illness which affects my concentration. I did not proof read my post because it's a waste of energy for me. It's just a post on the internet. Also when I was on my teaching course I was told it doesn't matter how your spelling/grammar is outside the lesson, you just need to know what you need to know for the lesson you're going to teach, then with experience you will improve anyway. I'm not a linguistics professor and I just made a typo that's it.

OP posts:
Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:24

@DivGirl Tbh it wasn't really a case of her generously giving me the benefit of the doubt, they needed someone to cover the next day and didn't have time to find and interview anyone else.

OP posts:
WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 20/05/2020 08:24

Oh and another who makes some nasty snide comment

Award goes to @Patsypie

WhentheRabbitsWentWild · 20/05/2020 08:26

Oh and another @GinDaddyRedux !

Nothing much to add but point out a distressed OPs spelling .
Get a Life.

Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:27

@AllIMissNowIsTheSea Yep. In fact when I was being observed on my course I was critiqued as being too "low energy". They must've assumed it was my personality but I'm pretty sure it's because I have actual low energy, because I'm not well. I think I'm clearly seeing that the classroom setting is not suitable for me.

OP posts:
Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:28

@WhentheRabbitsWentWild I'm really starting to feel like I trolled myself with that spelling mistake, lol.

OP posts:
Brefugee · 20/05/2020 08:29

is it EFL teaching or is it teaching english in a school?

Either way - I think you need to make sure you can put enough energy into lesson prep, especially as someone with little experience. When i was teaching EFL i realised pretty quickly that I'd have to invest a LOT of time to get started, but then as time went on you can use the same or similar materials/lesson plans so they don't require so much prep time.

It always seems supremely unfair that companies hiring (not just teachers) want 20 years experience but want to pay the salary of someone only just starting out. It's the way of the world, I'm afraid.

OP, if you really really love teaching enough to want to stick with it, and you're quite sensitive you probably need to look for the kind of set up that involves people who really want to learn who are therefore less invested in ousting a teacher (although then you have to be good or they do complain). Maybe one-to-one online? for Business people or something?

Good luck Flowers

Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:32

@TryingToBeBold Actually it's not a secondary school it's a language school. The students were on holiday from various countries and doing an English Language course. I think they were paying a lot to be there. They had various teachers, not sure if they even knew I wasn't a regular.

OP posts:
CuriousaboutSamphire · 20/05/2020 08:36

but I felt extremely anxious and guilty that a gang of the students had complained about me. Most of the lesson they were texting on their phones or just sitting staring into space not doing their work. They are paying a lot of money for that course, so I could understand with me being an inexperienced teacher they didn't feel like they were getting their money's worth, but they didn't seem interested or motivated during the lesson anyway.

That's the nature of students. They, like water, will take the path of least resistance when it comes to work. They can also be extremely well organised and militant when they perceive they have had something taken from them, their rights transgressed.

What you have to do is decide how you want to tackle it. It can be tackled. In many many different ways. I used to veer between a tired "Oh, put it away" to just stopping, standing and staring. It depended on the specific class, the students involved. I only once made the mistake of explaining myslef... they know full well why.

You need to show in your teaching that you understand different learning styles and how to engage students and keep them learning - games, multisensory input, something visual, something auditory, something kinasthetic, some repetition, some writing, some conversation, something requiring the students to stand up and move - even with social distancing in place. You need to show flexibility, creativity, ability to read the room and adapt and empathy for students - you need to twig instantly when they haven't understood and alter your communication to their level of English. Sadly all of that is true.. and necessary these days. Not that it shoudn't always be done, but you need to show it has been done and remember the students are used to having all the bells and whistles. And still retain the "Oh, stand in teacher, lets rip her to shreds" every generation of students has had.

First you have to decide if you actually want to persue teaching. I too have a chronic illness and managed to teach for a couple of decades. I left before it got too bad, probably should have left a few years earlier. So if you do go ahead do so with a clear idea of when/what your exit startegy would be.

Grab books like Paul Ginnis's Teachers Toolkit; Pimp Your Lesson, Teachin Backwards, Teaching Without Talking etc. You may, like me, fight the idea of them with every tooth and nail, but when you find the bits you like they really do help you engage students effectively.

And then find opportunities to increase your experience. Maybe try a few different settings. After 5 years out of the classroom I have decided that I could bear the thought of some formal teaching again, but have decided to teach adults in community settings.

Good luck finding your niche!

Mushu92 · 20/05/2020 08:36

@Brefugee It's EFL. I think you are right, I am not suited to big classroom settings. Also I don't think I have the energy to prepare as thoroughly as I need to. I started the day after the interview and showed up 1 hour before class started to try and prepare and get all the print outs etc. If I would have turned up any earlier I would have been too exhausted to teach. It's difficult to find any profession which is suitable for someone with an illness, to be honest.

OP posts:
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