Would you hate to attend a Zoom hen party?

[Coffeeandteach]

Less of an AIBU and more what do you think?

My hen party, that I planned myself, was meant to be next weekend. Today, a friend asked if I want a hen party on Zoom. I appreciate the sentiment but is it a bit shit for all involved? They don't all know each other and it has the potential to be really awkward. I've been told I should be more open minded but all I can think about is how much everyone else will hate it and I'll just end up feeling even shitter.

YANBU- I would hate to attend
YABU- I would attend

I wouldn’t attend it would be really awkward.

You'd definitely need games, not just sitting and chatting. I've done zoom drinks with 8 people, we're all good friends but it's still weird so with strangers I'd find that awkward.

It really depends on the people. 2 weekends ago I had a 'house party' similar to zoom with some mum friends. It started at 7 and I finally dragged myself to bed at 3 am . I wasnt sure how it would go but the time flew and the wine flowed.....

Nightmare, hideous?!
There's some right drama llamas on MN.
Obviously it won't be the same as all being in person, but I'd "go" to it.
That way I'd still be with my friend on what would have been my hen night.
Could all get some drinks in, maybe do something interactive like a quiz or some games so it's not just chatting.

been her not my hen night

I’d join if i was your friend but I probably wouldn’t enjoy it. We have Friday drinks with my team of 10 and that is very much a case of everyone either speaking over each other or waiting their turn to speak, it’s not really conducive for any amount of time.

One of my friends is really struggling with lockdown so we’ve been doing quite a few online things like a virtual bottomless brunch, quizzes and wine tasting but to be completely honest I always get the feeling that people are desperate to leave as soon as they can. I also find it odd to then at the end of the call just be drunk in my house!

Yes I would. You'll need an ice breaker of two though!!

Alternatively have a few, each with fewer attendees and ones that know each other.

Oh and if you’re doing it off your phone I highly recommend a little tripod to hold it in the perfect position so you can sit in your garden or similar.

It wouldn't be my first choice but for a friend I'd do it rather than them miss out on their hen do. Enough wine, good friends etc and it'll be fun one way or another even if not as good as the original.

My hen do was supposed to be tomorrow. I thought about this but decided against it (might have a zoom party with a couple of my closest friends, but not everyone who was invited to the hen do).

We're thinking of having a zoom non wedding party for family though, to raise a toast to the wedding that never was.

For tomorrow, I'm getting a takeaway and opening a bottle of prosecco. Rock n roll.

Went to one last week and it was great! We had a quiz and then ended up chatting into the night. People left at different times, no stress. It was probably more fun and a lot less hassle than a traditional one. Go for it!

I think if you had a small group and reworked the plans it could work? I'd be tempted to do some mini "catch ups" via zoom with small groups who all know each other (only if you want to), and then have a low key party when things are more alive again later.

You could do a murder quiz - dress up as characters share a meal drink with cheeses or tea party?

Definitely do multiple parties. I got married 20 years ago and had two hen nights, one where I lived with my uni friends and one in my home with old school friends (and my Mum, Aunt and best friend's Mum who were the wild outrageous ones!).

Zoom is a bit unnatural but it's still nice to get together. My extended family had one a couple of weeks ago and it was great, DH and I reckoned it was 3 years since we'd all been together so that was really nice. On the other hand DH's family are having them regularly and while I enjoyed our Easter lunch together and think it's fine for DH to have daily video calls with his Mum (she lives alone in a different city) I'm not looking forward to the quiz. I am excessively competitive though.

I would absolutely attend a friend's hen party zoom and if someone is willing to do the work to organise games that's great. I'm not too zoomed out though, we use zoom for work but usually do screen sharing rather than videos so it's quite the novelty to have a video call and see my workmates.

I would hate to attend a zoom party. I would hate to attend a hen party. I would definitely hate to attend a zoom hen party.

Can you restructure it so you do a few smaller groups who mostly know each other?

I do catch ups with friends and wine, it's nice, we have a laugh. Keep it light, have some structure and it'll be nice.

However when is the wedding?

I have been to zoom parties with people I only know from a festival and meeting ups since then, and we all went to a Karaoke party run by lady in America and attended by people all over the world, had a fab time.

There are good games that work well on zoom as ice breakers and once everyone has had a few drinks it flows much better.

And no queues for the loos or the bar, no costs of taxis and hotels and drinks are much cheaper too. Make sure you have all your fave. Drinks, nice glasses, ice, straws etc.

Be clear that you will still have a proper night out once we are released and relax and enjoy an evening with your fave people.