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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be so upset they have got another dog.

113 replies

Afternooninthepark · 12/05/2020 09:17

I know this is out of my control and really nothing to do with me but I am so angry and upset.
My Dh’s sister and her partner have been together for 12 years. During that time they have had 6 dogs and only kept one long term. First, they had two Yorkies but got rid after a few months as they were too yappy, then came a small mixed breed pup but they got rid of her after a year as she pulled over one of the kids when he was walking her, next came a pug which they kept until he died at 8, then a cockerpoo pup but got rid at 4 months as he was too hyper and that upset the pug!, then last year (after the pug died) they got a Weimaraner pup but she went after 6 months as she was getting too big ffs!!
I’m a real dog lover and it absolutely boils my blood every time they get a new dog without any thought and I’m even more incandescent when they rehome them and don’t give it a second thought.
Dh told me yesterday they have just gone and got another puppy last week.
I am bloody fuming.

OP posts:
Raella50 · 12/05/2020 09:46

You didn’t say they were abusing the animals though, you said they were rehoming them. Are we suggesting we condemn people who rehome animals even if they always treat them well in their care and then find them a loving bit more suitable home? I don’t agree with them continuing to adopt more dogs but I think the posters calling them scum sound horrible too. I don’t think it’s any of your business unless there are concerns over the dogs welfare, in which case call the RSPCA. Being upset over it is an odd reaction.

SpillTheTeaa · 12/05/2020 09:47

YANBU people really need to do their research on dogs before they purchase them rather than 'that looks cute'

Thymelord · 12/05/2020 09:50

I think it is everyone's business to be concerned about the welfare of animals. People who fecklessly buy pets (from irresponsible breeders who then go on to breed more) and then flog them off on facebook and gumtree and preloved once they are bored of them, should absolutely be judged and called out.

The RSPCA are notoriously useless. Independent rescues and animal charities are underfunded. If people didn't make it their business to care about these animals then they'd suffer and it would go unnoticed. So actually, you couldn't be more wrong and it just looks as though you are trying to virtue signal by calling people horrible. Animals have no voice. Some of us have chosen to BE their voice.

Lynda07 · 12/05/2020 09:51

Your sister in law and brother in law are totally irresponsible. Why on earth don't they take some advice before getting an animal so they know what to expect. I feel very sorry for their ex dogs and hope they found good homes in the end.

Ravenclawgirl · 12/05/2020 09:51

Oh no. That is disgraceful.

darrenlacey · 12/05/2020 09:52

I'd honestly refuse to have anything to do with them ever again. Utter bastards.

Littlemeadow123 · 12/05/2020 09:53

This behaviour annoys me so much, and I am in support of all dog owners should having licences. Each time you get a new dog, you have to agree to a background check.

dottiedodah · 12/05/2020 09:54

I just despair of these kinds of people TBH! Have they not learnt by now that they are not "dog people"! As for getting shot of a dog because they got "too big" WTAF! Surely anyone getting a WH would know they aint exactly the size of a poodle when fully grown! I would find it hard not to say anything ,but it seems it falls on deaf ears anyway.Surely their DC must be upset .Do you think they bow to pressure from their DC who are probably begging for a new pet? Reminds me of how some feckless people seem to have multiple partners /children and then cannot cope!

TheRealSlamShady · 12/05/2020 09:54

Things like this really piss me off and one of my SIL is like this.

I love dogs, grown up with them and it breaks my heart I can't have one or two but my and H work full time and it's not fair
Some people are just selfish

RedRed9 · 12/05/2020 09:55

Being upset over it is an odd reaction.
It really isn’t. I think your reaction is the oddest @Raella50 do you really think it’s acceptable to treat a pet as a disposable item?

There was a documentary a while back about rescue centres and in part of it they filmed the dogs being left. The dogs looked for/expected their owners to come back for months. It was heartbreaking.

CaptainButtock · 12/05/2020 09:56

Idiots.
What, exactly, do they do with all their 'cast-offs'?

Chillipeanuts · 12/05/2020 09:56

I had an acquaintance who rehomed two expensive, pedigree dogs because they shed hair on her carpet.
Immediately replaced them with a pair of short haired, toy breed dogs.
No longer an acquaintance.

Pinkblueberry · 12/05/2020 09:57

YANBU. It’s such a fucking childish attitude to have - ‘I want this and I want it now’ with no real thought given to the poor animal.

Harakeke · 12/05/2020 09:57

They sound awful. And what are they teaching their children about pet ownership?

Roselilly36 · 12/05/2020 10:00

Appalling, that would really upset me too, I wouldn’t be able to keep my opinion to myself either.

Waspnest · 12/05/2020 10:00

I'd be fuming as well. What has your DH said to them? Personally I'd be tempted to make a snide comment along the lines of 'well there's no point in us meeting it ever as I doubt you'll keep it for long will you?' Are they generally dickheads?

Some people just don't think things through (no excuses though), I have a friend with an only child who seems to think that having a dog or cat would be good for her child. She adopted 2 rescue cats with serious issues and just couldn't cope with them so they went back. Then she got a puppy and struggled to train it so gave it back to the breeder. I think it's only now that she accepts that she has neither the time or energy to put into looking after animals.

millerjane · 12/05/2020 10:05

I DESPISE people like this. My dog was awful for the first 18 months but with the right training and discipline he is now wonderful and the apple of my eye. They are living creatures and should never be disposed of.

BovaryX · 12/05/2020 10:07

These people are not fit to look after a stuffed toy. Treating animals like a plastic accessory is squalid behaviour. It's a damn shame there is nothing to stop the clowns who do this and the cruelty they bankroll.

Raella50 · 12/05/2020 10:07

@RedRed9 no of course not! I love dogs and actually think the ownership license idea is a good one. Some people take on dogs and just don’t realise what they’re getting themselves into. As irresponsible as that is, it’s not always in the best interest of the dog to stay in these families. Sometimes rehoming dogs is the best option for all. I strongly disagree with buying multiple dogs int be way they have done but I also disagree with calling people scum and disowning my family members because I don’t agree with them. Although if they had been abusing the dogs then that would be a different issue.

JasonPollack · 12/05/2020 10:09

That's so sad.

Toilenstripes · 12/05/2020 10:09

I have a family member like this. Over the years I’ve had to disengage for this and other reasons, but it’s heartbreaking to see.

stophuggingme · 12/05/2020 10:09

@Raella50 do you have or have you have owned a dog?

If so you would know that they form deep social and emotional bonds with people
To be re- for no reason other than they get too big is definitely abusive and very distressing to an animal that has built their world around this person

Zaphodsotherhead · 12/05/2020 10:10

I've got a Patterdale and she's the most yappy, high needs, unsociable, all round difficult dog I've ever owned.

I love every hair on her whiskery face and I tell her so every day (whilst kissing her).

Dogs are not toys. A dog truly should be for life, unless there is some fundamental reason why you need to return it. And if that's the case dont keep getting bloody new ones!

Is there any chance that it's one of their kids who's behind this? The only person I knew who did this sort of thing, it was her very difficult teenage daughter who would plead for a dog (otherwise she threatened to run away from home), get a dog, neglect the dog, dog was basically unwanted by everyone else so rehomed and then the cycle would start again...

BlingLoving · 12/05/2020 10:11

The absolute best thing about our NDN moving out was we no longer had to watch the parade of dogs they would adopt, then promptly have to rehome. It was always because the dog was too yappy or too aggressive or whatever and they never accepted that perhaps it was because they never walked the dog, the dog wasn't allowed inside and although they had a large garden, they'd fenced off most of it so that the dog wouldn't mess up the grass so they had to live just in the paved bit which was constantly in shade. It was awful. We would often be on verge of calling RSPC when they'd rehome the dog.

So no, YANBU OP. I feel your pain.

Raella50 · 12/05/2020 10:13

Yes we have a dog! He’s been with us six years and we love him very much! Yes it’s a stupid reason to rehome but would we prefer the animal to be forced to stay in that scenario? To be unloved/ ignored/ to have its owners constantly frustrated at it? It sounds like a very sad situation.

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