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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Keeping children at home until September

611 replies

Witchcraftandhokum · 10/05/2020 11:50

I work in a school and I'm seeing and hearing a lot of this both on here and in the contact I have with parents. I am worried about how we will manage social distancing and whether we will have PPE if the schools open soon, but I do appreciate the need for kids to be in school, particularly Year 6 and 10.

I also don't know how it will work if a lot of parents chose not send their kids back until September. I wonder just how many parents will do this?

So...
YABU - My kids won't be back until September.
YANBU - My kids will go back as soon as the schools open.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
angstridden2 · 10/05/2020 17:51

one and twenty
How do you manage to work ft (from home?) and homeschool four children even if two are older.... is their father around to help. Genuinely interested to know how you do it.... not sure I could!

ineedaholidaynow · 10/05/2020 17:52

Surely a cost of home ed is the loss of all or part of a salary. A cost doesn't actually have to mean paying for something, it can mean the loss of income, in this scenario.

Bollss · 10/05/2020 17:54

Surely a cost of home ed is the loss of all or part of a salary. A cost doesn't actually have to mean paying for something, it can mean the loss of income, in this scenario

Yeah not dissimilar to us who work and want schools to open so we don't lose any income? Us who got galled hysterical by that poster?

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:05

How is home ed expensive

because even if you don't include the cost of online tutors or general resources - even things like twinkl are not free usually, the cost of groups is prohibitive. I am sure you can keep your children at home with you, but I couldn't imagine depriving them of a social life, sports and hobbies. All the home ed groups here seem to be really pricey.

Plus the fact that me properly home schooling would mean the complete loss of my salary. I can't afford that.

Bollss · 10/05/2020 18:06

Do you not realise how massively hypocritical you're being? It's laughable.

Drivingdownthe101 · 10/05/2020 18:07

Plus the fact that me properly home schooling would mean the complete loss of my salary. I can't afford that

Which is why some others really need their children to go back to school.

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:11

angstridden2
screens Grin I also chose my working hours, so I kept regular hours for the kids. If I had to work 9 to 5, we would be doing schooling after 5 - which is the time reserved for homework usually, so not that big a leap anyway.

I do bits during the day, and most of my work in the evening.

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:16

TrustTheGeneGenie
what's hypocritical? My kids health and well being is a lot more important than school work. They are not going to lose out on their future because they have a break from school, give me a break.

There's strictly no benefit for them to go back to school in negative condition.

Yes, it would make my life easier, I'd love nothing more than going to have my hair done, go to the gym or have a facial. That's not what the school is for though, is it. I am not talking about convenience, I am talking about what is best for the children.

A long term decision about homeschooling has nothing to do with school closure during the pandemic, which affects absolutely everybody. Let's not pretend it's the same.

angstridden2 · 10/05/2020 18:19

Your honesty re screen time is refreshing.... I think people are beating themselves up at the FB mums running a business empire whilst ensuring their compliant children work without complaint and happily entertain themselves with craft activities!!

Bollss · 10/05/2020 18:21

You don't want schools to open because of kids mental health. Doesn't matter about those suffering from being at home.

Also those who are bothered about their financial situation changing because schools aren't opening are "hysterical" but you definitely couldn't home school because it would effect you financially.

So basically as long as you're ok fuck everyone else, and their kids.

DamnYankee · 10/05/2020 18:23

YANBU. My kids can't wait to go back in August. (US)

According to the CDC, studentz wearing masks would largely be to protect me, statistically speaking.

I am in favor of parents sending their children to school with masks if they wish, with the understanding that I can't police that, nor can I keep up with yet another personal belonging. (The water bottles, alone, oy vey!)

I am ok with the risk.

I am on board with ramping up hand-washing and disinfecting the classroom more often - down to the doorknob and pencil sharpener. Even ok with taking their temps. I will be sending students who come to school with a couch to the office double-quick!

LittleBearPad · 10/05/2020 18:23

I am sure you can keep your children at home with you, but I couldn't imagine depriving them of a social life, sports and hobbies.

No, that would be sad wouldn’t it... Hmm

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:24

TrustTheGeneGenie
no need to twist my words and taking them out of context.
You should re-read the poster I was actually replying to, who was hysterical about children losing out their entire childhood and so on.

Context is everything.

And no, I don't believe that forcing the children in schools and imposing social distancing and new rules that will completely alter their usual school days is of any benefit to the kids.

Secondary schools are one thing. They are old enough to get it. Younger ones? absolutely not workable and realistic.

Bollss · 10/05/2020 18:25

Fairly certain I got called hysterical too for worrying about losing my job and my home but ok.

Surely you can appreciate that if schools open you have the choice to send them? And those of us who need to send them will and it might you know prevent us losing our homes?

LittleBearPad · 10/05/2020 18:27

I don’t think any one has said they are missing their entire childhoods?

One you are the poster who appears hysterical. You certainly use hyperbole a lot.

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:27

we all have an opinion, but as already happened when the schools closed down to start with, what you or I think doesn't matter anyway. What is due to happen will happen, it's already planned!

These threads will be amusing to read in a few years...

Bollss · 10/05/2020 18:30

I don't think they will be amusing when we are starting to realise the effect this has had on our children. On our lives.

I think it will actually be quite sad.

OneandTwenty · 10/05/2020 18:32

LittleBearPad

let me quote...

children at breaking point
the state locking our children away for six months
huge crisis that is happening to our kids right now. Some are scared of flying things, some have stopped eating altogether, others too scared to leave their room, or go out.
and that is just the healthy kids

They will have fully entrenched psychological problems after so long out of school
I am furious on their behalf, they are being forced to sacrifice their childhoods, education, friendships, mental health, physical health for something that will not harm them

But hey, if you want to say I am the hysterical one because I have another opinion, go for it. Smile

Whatnametomorrow10 · 10/05/2020 18:37

I keep reading these - what is the difference between say June and September? The virus isn’t going anywhere? You can catch it the same now as you would do in September?

The only difference after seeing the behaviour of people shopping today some might get it before September. I was the only twat social distancing and family of 3 adults coughing and touching everything meaning no one else could use the aisle as social distancing around them was very tricky!

I do think we need to look into opening schools soon - slowly cautiously and with the option of children not attending if there parents don’t wish. Maybe it’s because both husband and I work FT and currently feeling emotional as we feel we are failing our children with homeschooling. Without really knowing if either of us will have a job with the financial long term impact .

It’s been a crappy day and I reading these comments not getting why the argument is! I get it my 76 MIL doesn’t want to get public transport for the near future and will probably look to avoid large social gatherings until a vaccine - that I get. Then I see my 10 year old slowly becoming more inward and closed down from a confident young person .

Sorry it was long feeling a little emotional today!

Bollss · 10/05/2020 18:40

None of that is hysterical imo.

dramallam4 · 10/05/2020 18:53

@OneandTwenty I don't understand why you think home ed is expensive, of course, home ed curriculums will be and actually imho are only there to get money out families that are new to home ed and are very off-putting. DD was home ed for years did her GCSEs at home and we got one of the home ed kits when she first left school it was barely used and she did far better with a couple of textbooks brought secondhand it will only ever be as expensive as you let it be

Rosebel · 10/05/2020 18:58

Some children are scared of returning to school though and not because of the virus. Obviously I'm concerned about my daughter going back and beginning to self harm again and obviously others are not worried about that because their children don't react that way.
Children returning to school are going to be in for a shock. I can't see sports being allowed or clubs reopening. If they return part time they won't be with their friends anyway or may not be. There is a possibility teachers will be in PPE and children may have masks on. Do you actually think your children are going to be better off with that?
Waiting until September gives us a chance to look at other countries, see what works and what doesn't. The measures might still need to be put in place but maybe not so strictly.
Also if children are only going part time how many parents will be able to go back to work anyway?

IndecentFeminist · 10/05/2020 18:59

Sorry, when you said earlier that you looked online and saw it cost a lot and asked who would pay for it, I assumed you'd looked at virtual schools etc @OneandTwenty

Summertime2 · 10/05/2020 19:06

@crustycrab

These statistics (no need for the quote marks btw) which are in fact official data, support the point that was made that incredibly few younger people without pre-existing conditions are at risk of dying from Covid.

And this is not daily mail shit as you called, it it is NHS England data.

Personally, I find factual information that allows me to understand my risk useful even if it doesn't reflect my individual experience.

Much better to understand reality than be made fearful by the experience of one person.

ABucketOfShells · 10/05/2020 19:18

I’ve just watched BJ, who has said reception, year 1& year 6 will be the first to back! Instant thought he was having a laugh, no chance. The youngest primary school children having so go to school in distressing and confusing circumstances. Absolutely no chance. I’ll pull my children out and reapply if I need too once there’s a vaccine or there’s enough immunity for it to not be so dangerous.

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