Am I a party pooper?

[notlyndasnell]

I don't mean to be a party pooper, but I cannot celebrate today, when tens of millions of people died as a result of WWII. I will remember those who died fighting and those who died at home. Those who didn't want war but only wanted to live their lives, go to work, raise their families, enjoy the company of friends - and who had that taken away from them.
As a mother of sons I am thankful - every day!- that we live in peaceful times and they don't have to go and fight some senseless war.
Most of my generation grew up in homes where the memories and trauma of two world wars were present and tangible in lots of ways. There was underlying fear that another war might happen, but also hope that it wouldn't. I learned not to take peace for granted: to be prepared for the worst and grateful for every year that went by without another conflict. And I learned to challenge those in power because we were taught at school what might happen if a nation unquestioningly trusted or followed their leaders instead of holding them to account.
So I won't be baking colourful cupcakes, putting up bunting or joining in the singalongs. I need a day of quiet contemplation and gratitude: for democracy and free speech, for peace and prosperity.
AIBU?

I am here on my own and cannot hear a street party although DS went for a walk earlier and said he could hear lots of them and people are out in neighbouring streets.

OH will have no choice as he is at work - in the Royal Navy

I’ve helped decorate the village and have poppies in my windows but I’ve not joined in all day. Luckily my neighbours are away from home but I can hear music in the village.
I’ve not joined in because I’ve been close to tears for a few weeks now and this would all set me off again . I do not need to hear Vera Lynn or anyone else singing we’ll meet again.
Thank goodness for Netflix and Prime and my garden.

@Boogiewoogietoo

^what they said...

Firstly, those who actually lived through the war saw fit to celebrate VE Day. They actually lost those they loved and suffered the trauma and struggles. In those circumstances it seems rather attention seeking to insist on quiet contemplation on this day. Secondly, I fear that the memory of the War and lessons learned would be lost for future generations if a big deal isn’t made of VE Day, Armistice day etc. I want my DC to learn about the War and this is a great way of doing it

The older people I know who lived through the war & who celebrated VE Day on the day & since, want to remember the END of the war in Europe. They want to celebrate today. They remember those whose lives were taken - they're able to hold both thoughts today

You do you, but quit the underlying criticism of those who choose to celebrate THE END if something so awful

I think YABU. We're celebrating a victory over Fascism.

I say this as someone who always has mixed feelings about VE Day as most of my relations who fought, were evacuated, died etc were in Asia. Hell on earth was nowhere near over for my grandmother, stuck in a civilian internment camp with people dying around her on an almost daily basis.

Hopefully we'll never need to rely on you lot in the future.

The flags everywhere for 'Victory in Europe' day make me feel so sad. We've left Europe and are being governed by careless selfish bastards.

So sit with your miserable face and leave others to celebrate 🤷🏻‍♀️Not really sure what the point of your post is? You don’t need mumsnet permission to not be cheerful and join in with fun you know

@joystir59, you make a very good point. And the loudest voices are absolutely those who voted for it.

You are both BU and NBU OP.
I agree with you absolutely but I also feel that others can 'celebrate' as they wish albeit i hope they do it quietly. If one imagines celebrating the liberation of Auschwitz for instance, it wouldn't be with bunting, brass bands and cake. Likewise so it should be with war.

I live in mainland Europe and it's a far more sombre affair.

Do you understand what VE Day is? It’s literally celebrating the end of the war. The fact that the war ended and that people wouldn’t have to fight and die in it any more. Surely that’s worth celebrating? I’d understand it if it was celebrating the start of the war but you’re literally being miserable about people being happy the war ended?

I don’t begrudge people celebrating but please remember it wasn’t the end of the war for everyone.

In my house we celebrate/are grateful for VJ day as that is where my relatives fought. This time 75 yrs ago they had a further 2 years to go....

However I think as a country it is good to celebrate and also fine to not bother.

@Alonelonelyloner

Yes well when you put it like that is seems inappropriate - sorry that did make me laugh 😂

Firstly, those who actually lived through the war saw fit to celebrate VE Day Some of them did, my father didn't, he was on an aircraft carrier in the Pacific, his younger brother (teenager at the time) didn't as he was serving on a submarine. I don't my granny did as she would have been worried about them. Some didn't celebrate as their loved ones were in Japanese POW camps.

AristotleAteMyHamster apologies you’re right, I misspoke. I was meaning that it was the end of the war in Europe and for many it meant that their loved ones would be coming home and not be put in danger again. I should have acknowledged the continuing fight in other parts of the world.

VE Day celebrates liberation from fascism OP.
So you are perfectly at liberty to spend it as you see fit.
It will have no impact, positive or negative, on any body else.

“ We're celebrating a victory over Fascism. ”

Seems the wrong time to celebrate this, given the current regime.

I've hung the EU flag out of the bedroom window.

Also VE Day is not usually celebrated so widely - it’s because it’s the 75th anniversary this year and the bank holiday was moved especially. I suspect as well this year the common themes of being separated from loved ones is resonating with many.

Next year it’ll go back to just sending the kids to school in red, white and blue and everyone pretty much ignoring the day.

@OneandTwenty
I didn’t call it shameful, as clearly stated at the bottom Of my post, of you had bothered to read that far. (Clearly not)
Those were the words of my patients NOT mine.

Sat raising a g&t. No decorations here, lost my job just before lockdown, so spending severely pruned, not willing to waste printer ink either. I’m saving my flour to make Dd a birthday cake at the end of the month as I’ve not been able to get any for 2 weeks.
We’ve got dd’s 8’ pool out and been in the garden planting up hanging baskets.
My parents who are isolating, easy as they live in the sticks, have got their best china out and had a beautiful afternoon tea with a glass of fizz.
Dsis has enjoyed tea and scones in her front garden.

ChickenFight my mum did too! No better time to remind ourselves...

I think a lot of the coverage/hype has been quite sickly and nauseating and actually detracts from the day

Usual media circus

It's all very well draping ours home in bunting and patting oursleves on the back for being on the winning side of a war in which most of us played no part.

The better way to spend today is to ask hard questions about the present. Stopping the march of the Alt-Right (and affiliated far-Right networks) before they tear our world apart again is time better spent.

Honouring the heroes of the 1940s isn't something we ought to do once a year, or when the Daily Mail want to sell a few papers. We ought to do it every day by identifying and standing up to the modern-day equivalents of those terrible times.

The above post is from Scientist from the EU. They have articulated what I am feeling about today. 25 years ago, I happily joined in with celebrations in central London. It was wonderful, it felt like Europe was a peaceful, prosperous place working together for the greater good.

I now feel that we have made ourselves less peaceful, less forward-thinking, less considerate and tolerant.

And it seems like the veterans who are so emotional, WHO WOULD NEVER WANT THE SAME TO HAPPEN AGAIN, all voted remain.

VE day just makes me realise how lucky we are.......because there are people around the world who have only ever known war and conflict.

And the UK has had a hand in a hell of a lot of it.